Forum archives » General Discussion » I Got My Hair Cut With A Nine Iron

matclarke
April 2, 2007 11:01 AM

Fuck me in the goat ass, after breaking up with my girlfriend who cut my hair for the past five years I ventured out to a new salon to have my lettuce trimmed. This is the result after a night of drinking to ease the pain...

This close up shows the true caliber of the work...

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UnknownEric
April 2, 2007 11:13 AM

GAH!  Was your hair cut by Stevie Wonder?

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boorite
April 2, 2007 11:42 AM

Holy Mother of God.

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not_Scyess
April 2, 2007 12:09 PM

Good thing no one hates you enough to put a picture of that on the Internet.

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gabe_billings
April 2, 2007 12:18 PM

Wait... Is that the job the salon did, or is that what the other bar patrons did with a dull knife after you passed out on the floor?

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matclarke
April 2, 2007 12:54 PM

This is about the worst that i've looked...ever...in my entire life...but I can't stop laughing at it...

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DarkwingDuck
April 2, 2007 12:56 PM

I personally think you look quite sporting.

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BigFrank105
April 2, 2007 1:30 PM

I want to lick it.

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matclarke
April 2, 2007 2:37 PM

I will be auctioning off the rights to shave my head here...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=180103299933

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BigFrank105
April 2, 2007 3:07 PM

I'll give you three bucks and a back massage.

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jes_lawson
April 2, 2007 3:35 PM

I shaved my own head once. While drunk. It looked as if I was suffering from acute radiation poisoning. Tough break, man.

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ivytheplant
April 2, 2007 6:36 PM

I'd totally bid on that, but I'd probably just end up making a wrong turn.

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crackpanther
April 3, 2007 6:12 AM

I have been shaving my head biweekly since 1996 and only stopped about six months ago because my wife kept calling me a skinhead, to which I replied she better keep her spic mouth shut if she doesn't want a knuckle sandwich for breakfast everyday.

 

Your auction coincidentally ends on her birthday. If you'll come to New Orleans I'll win the auction and let her shave your head as her present, from me.

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gabe_billings
April 3, 2007 7:58 AM

I've also been shaving my head since the late 90s, and I haven't quit. The only thing my wife makes fun of is when I shave my beard too. It only happened once, on Halloween when I went as Mr. Clean. "Don't ever do that again," she said. It looked awful.

I'll pay you $5 if I get to shave your balls, too.

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ivytheplant
April 3, 2007 9:05 AM

I'll bid on the video.

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matclarke
April 3, 2007 6:52 PM

Hair today, gone tomorrow...

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mandingo
April 3, 2007 11:57 PM

i always joke and call matclarke 'pussy magnet' but he's now been demoted to 'handjob magnet.' (if he wouldn't have shaved it, it would have been 'kiss on the cheek and a handshake goodnight magnet')

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matclarke
April 6, 2007 2:58 PM

Bald Head. Tough Guy Sunglasses. Obligatory Myspace Driving Pic.

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gabe_billings
April 6, 2007 3:28 PM

I can't begin to tell you how much better the new cut looks. If you looked like you did in that first pic, I wouldn't even stop to piss on you if you were on fire.

Now I'd gladly stop and take a dump on you if you were on fire.

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matclarke
April 6, 2007 4:37 PM

Thanks in advance for the excrement.

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BigFrank105
April 6, 2007 4:45 PM

quote:

matclarke wrote:

Bald Head. Tough Guy Sunglasses. Obligatory Myspace Driving Pic.


So where's your obligatory "black and white shot of you wearing black eyeliner and looking away from the camera" myspace pic?

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not_Scyess
April 6, 2007 4:48 PM

I think those sunglasses are better described as "giant hunks of translucent plastic that fit around grandpa's nearly-as-enormous prescription glasses" sunglasses.

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matclarke
April 6, 2007 7:18 PM

"giant hunks of translucent plastic that fit around grandpa's nearly-as-enormous prescription glasses"

All the cool kids are doing it. Or so I read in US magazine.

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