So check this out. My girlfriend tells me that I have no ambition. I told her that's not true. I told her that I want to become a Samurai. I want to be a high-ranking Samurai in the navy of the pharaoh of Canada. The Pharaoh is an immortal vampire type thing whose tomb is guarded by fierce penguins and undead pirates. If you go down into his tomb and awaken him from his 1,000 year sleep he will grant you one wish before he destroys the world. That's when I get to become a Samurai.
So I tell my girlfriend all this and she just kind of backs away slowly and then jumps out a window. I haven't seen her since. All I can figure is that the bitch must be a lesbian.