Forum archives » General Discussion » Dem bones

ivytheplant
September 4, 2007 10:41 AM

Anyone got some human remains and/or arrowheads we can have? Someone decided it would be a good idea to put another apartment building practically touching ours (what's the point of windows?). I'm watching the surveyor stake it out now. We figured if we could bury some artifacts, it might slow construction down for a couple months. By the time there's sufficient study to realize it's all fake (Uwyo has a hardon for halting construction due to archaeology), winter will hit and the crew will have to pack it up for a season. That way, we might get some sleep for the next two months. And go to the bathroom in peace.

I guess this place really was too good to be true.

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The_young_scot
September 4, 2007 11:28 AM

I've got a boner, if that helps.

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ivytheplant
September 4, 2007 11:36 AM

I knew that surveyor looked familiar.

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The_young_scot
September 4, 2007 12:22 PM

I'm here to lay down some pipe

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HCRoyall
September 4, 2007 12:53 PM

quote:

ivytheplant wrote:

Anyone got some human remains and/or arrowheads we can have?


If I had brought more money on my honeymoon I could have bought some pirate-y crap for you to bury. THAT would have thrown them for a loop.

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not_Scyess
September 4, 2007 1:09 PM

If you put the human remains in the window facing the new building, that might discourage anyone from moving in if they do build it.

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boorite
September 4, 2007 4:33 PM

I hope the new building is close enough to reach from our window with an extension ladder so we can play Mt. Everest Crevasse Crosser with the neighbors.

 

First player to fall gets a free ride to the hospital.

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biped
September 4, 2007 9:37 PM

I checked my human remains jar, but it was empty.  Those pesky kids--it seems no shelf is too high for them.

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crackpanther
September 5, 2007 5:47 AM

One time I was playing in my grandfather's woods in Alabama and found someone's femur, but I wasn't allowed to keep it for you :<

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not_Scyess
September 5, 2007 7:02 AM

quote:

boorite wrote:

First player to fall gets a free ride to the hospital.


Those rides aren't free unless your med insurance is MUCH better than mine.

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boorite
September 5, 2007 11:30 AM

quote:

not_Scyess wrote:
quote:

boorite wrote:

First player to fall gets a free ride to the hospital.


Those rides aren't free unless your med insurance is MUCH better than mine.


I mean in the back of my pickup.

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biped
September 5, 2007 2:20 PM

"Them pickups sure make bumpy am'blances, mmm-hmm."

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Injokester
September 5, 2007 9:01 PM

I helped a friend's brother in law tear down some walls between 2 shops he'd bought to turn into a restaurant. When we lifted up the old floorboards we found a human jawbone and the metal components of an antique gun. I'm sure there was more, but he didn't want to slow up construction so he just left it there.

A better story comes courtesy of my friend Gavin, whose father was an orthopedic surgeon. After he completed his doctorate they allowed him to keep an actual human skeleton for use in his practise. After a time he found he didn't need it anymore, so he put it in a cardboard box and stored it in his family's games cupboard.

When Gavin was a teenager he and his brother found the box, and started having sword fights with the shin bones. They started getting their friends over for tournaments and everything, and the winners got to keep a bone. After they tired of that they strapped a femur to the grill of Gavin's mate's ute, where it's been ever since.

Of course their dad eventually caught them, and rather than dispose of the body correctly (and have to explain the chips, dents and missing pieces), he just put what was left in a hessian sack and left it up in the roof.

5 years and 2 new owners later the police knocked on the door of their new house.

Gavin now lives here in Tasmania, when he moved down he bought a house and discovered it has a small room down the back of the basement. The room has a lock on the outside of the door, holes in the walls that appear to have been smashed with a rock- these lead to small tunnels that appear to be dug out by hand, and rough steel bars bolted over the windows on the inside (very obviously not done by a builder). In the room he found half a backgammon set with no dice. There were no other contents.

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boloboffin
September 5, 2007 9:07 PM

John Wesley Hardin was such an anti-social bastard that he shot a man for snoring too loud.

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ivytheplant
September 5, 2007 9:26 PM

You mean John Wesley HardON! Ahahahaha!

Christ, I've been around boorite too long.

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boorite
September 6, 2007 2:31 PM

quote:

Injokester wrote:

I helped a friend's brother in law tear down some walls between 2 shops he'd bought to turn into a restaurant. When we lifted up the old floorboards we found a human jawbone and the metal components of an antique gun. I'm sure there was more, but he didn't want to slow up construction so he just left it there.


So I guess the question is, how haunted is this restaurant?

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UnknownEric
September 7, 2007 6:27 AM

quote:

ivytheplant wrote:

You mean John Wesley HardON! Ahahahaha!


That was Dylan's album just after "Blonde Licking Blonde" and just before "Nashville Pantyline" right?

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