Massengil launched its biggest ad campaign yet.

"Hey look!  It's Robin Williams' career!"

Bob never ended up buying the elephant.

Sure there was lots of room in the trunk but the rear of the animal smelled like it was burning oil or something...

"I'm still not convinced I like one of the presidential candidates.  Let's try putting my head up my own ass. That works for most of the country."

The most popular prank at the zoo is still teaching the newbie how to "feed" the fabled tnahpele.

That picture was after he got promoted.  He started out with rhinos:

(the rest of the series is here, you sick zoologic fucks) 

the Animal Liberation Front teaches Richard Gere that payback's a sonuvabich

Worst scavenger hunt ever.

impacted crap satchel extractor

Dave thought getting eaten by the rampaging elephant was bad, but then...

"When will I ever get my turn?" thought Ahmed the frustrated  head-up-the-elephant's-ass-sticker-upper apprentice...

"You have to work up to this," said the man from within the elephant's colon; "if you want to get to this level you must put on the furry gloves and start as an elephant clitorus massager and advance up the ladder."

Chich in bar:  So, what do you do?

Guy who smells like elephant shit:  I'm in showbusiness.

For many a fetish elephant, hamsters were just way too small.

"well there's your problem"