George learned a valuable lesson about cocaine and cooking. He also learned to never chop his fuckin' fingers off. Cause it hurts. 

That's the last time I cook for cannibals.

The pain was so unbearable, that Frank decided to shoot himself. But all he could find was a nail gun. He shot nails into his skull repeatedly, praying for death's merciful steel to strike him down, but the nails wouldn't quite go deep enough. So then he hooked lamp cord up to the nails and plugged it into an electric socket, but that only caused his eyeballs to explode and smoke to pour from his ears. Blindly stumbling around, he stepped on a rollerskate that someone had left on the floor, and he tumbled downstairs into the basement where he had absent-mindedly left a buzzsaw running. The buzzsaw cut off his legs but he eventually managed to crawl outside where a hungry pit bull promptly bit off his testicles.

Its better than what he accidentally cut up last week.

thats so fake where's the blood there would be blood duh

That's not how you make lady fingers!