this is Flea's great-great-grandfather, Bed Bug

I have come to forcibly place my shoe upon posteriors and to masticate flavored gum of arabic, and my stores of flavored gum of arabic have become depleted.

Female dogs are not feces but garden implements and magic.

                      Uncle Sam Wants You!

To mince about and occasionally order some militiamen to their deaths.

"I thought MY penis was small!"

Apparently, the "pull my finger" gag has been around for centuries...

"Bitch-eth, mine 'Pimp hand' shall be verily upside-your head."

Surprisingly chipper for a man whose middle finger was replaced with an uncircumcised penis.

I have passion in my pantaloons and I have no fear in letting you witness it

I HAVE LARGE LEVELS OF SEXUAL APPETITE AND I AM AWARE OF IT

Place thine hand upon this digit and utilize torque to gain thine surprize.