"Photoshop?  I don't need no stinking photoshop!"

She's going to star in a new sitcom called "Punky and the Twins".

On the first day of shooting her new sitcom, her tits were on time, but the rest of her was fifteen minutes late

You don't motor boat those babies...  You motor cruise ship them!

Her waist is thin because nothing will grow in the shade!

Talk about blimp hangers!

"How big are my feet?  Do I have feet?"

"My dress is Versace.  My bra is Grainger."

Airbags are optional

I hide a .44 magnum under the left one, and the ammo for it under the right!

Fun bags?  More like fun bean bags!

"I titty-slap my boyfriend the other night and they charged me with attempted murder!"

"Does this dress make my chest look fat?"

"What sloshing sound?"

Her cups size is O, as in O MY GOD!!!

I'll bet those babies don't feel like a bag of sand!

"I wonder what RandomComicLayoutGuy will say about me next?"

I would love to be her Breast Friend Forever!

"The irony is I'm lactose intolerant!"

They'll be coming around the corner when she comes...

"Phreaky ain't got nothing on me!"

"The name is Boobs.  Big Boobs."

"I'm going in for my annual breast exam.  I'll be back in a week."

Breast-feeding a baby is a two-person job for her!

"Yes, my back hurts.  Along with my knees, and my ankles, and my midsection, and my quadraceps, and my calves, and my glutes, and my..."

"In life, you're going to trip and fall at times.  The key is to bounce back up.  In my case, it's automatic!"

"I'm originally from Cleavage, I mean, CLEVELAND."

"The best part is I can drive in the carpool lane all by myself!"

You know that old joke on how to make a horse laugh, and then make it cry?

For her, it applies to cows.

Holy crap, RCLG LOL

I'm over here cracking up too hard to caption the photo. 

Here's another picture of her so you know what I'm talking about:

"The funny thing about my 'chicken legs' is... who cares?"

"I don't know what I'd do without re-bar!"

"I can't swim or tread water, but I float automatically."

i think we've milked her titties for all they're worth!

"I auditioned for that TV show "Twin Peaks", but they said I was overqualified!"

"I'm the founder of the Lean Forward women's movement!"

The surgeon who did herbreast reduction surgery was charged with two felony counts of being a complete ASSHOLE!

"Everyday, I get micro-aggressions from jealous women regarding my macro-mastia!"

"I don't mean to brag, but EVERY conversation I have is titillating!"

She wanted to pose for Juggs magazine, but they said she was overqualified.  So, they suggested she try Containerss magazine!

"Whenever I'm at a boring party, I tell me friends I'm going to bounce...  I don't mean I'm going to leave...  I'm going to stand there and bounce...  The party generally livens up at then."

"The left one is for feeding my babies...  The right one's for feeding Ethiopia!"

"I'm sorry...  You're going to need a lot more tat than that!"  (think about it)

"I am the booby prize!"

"You can follow me at my Titter account, #ican'tlayonmystomachwhenisleep."

"My milkshake brings Western Europe to my yard..."

"I'm okay with breast-feeding in public.  I do it all of the time...  Children?  What children?"

Before & After:

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!