quote:
Pita's a good-looking woman. We joke around, but this is not a good subject for jokes. The fashion biz spends plenty of money making women feel like shit about the way they look so they'll buy some bogus product, and it pisses me off because it convinces perfectly attractive women that you're not serious when you tell them how pretty they are. Let's not fuck around with this.
Pita's hotter than the likes of us deserve.
Why do you assume she cares? Just cause she's a woman, you sexist bastard!
Seriously, though, I don't give a fuck about the way I look. True, when I was 400 pounds, it was very difficult admitting it here. That was because there is so much discrimination against the super-obese (that shit ain't a fairytale, believe me), I was afraid if I shared that fact, the discrimination would follow me to the internet, which is really the great equalizer.
I don't give a fuck about how any of you look. I care about how funny you are and how fun it is to talk to you. Your words. I'm not looking at you everytime you post, I'm reading your words. I care about you, not your packaging.
...God that last line would get pussy.
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He sat on a quarter and a booger came flying out of George Washington's nose.
He walked up to the counter at McDonalds and said yes.
Mosquitos schedule their breeding around his walks.
If he spits in the tub and gets in, it overflows.
When he sneezes, the resultant jiggling can only be described by the Mandelbrot set.
If he sat on a log he'd kill the forest.
When skinny people wander too close to him, they get trapped orbiting.
He uses an exponential scale.
The only car big enough for him is box.
When he started dieting, the commodities market crashed.
When he visited Mt. Rushmore, it looked like a quintuplet.
He would've been a good football player, but his ass kept getting stuck in the goal posts.
He's the first human person visible from space.
He doesn't live in Arizona, Arizona lives on him.
Three missing children are lost in his folds.