Hmm, let me see my chart here...it says here that you've been going through an abnormally high amount of stress lately.
Yeah, Doc. I think it all goes back to Junior High, when I would always stand outside my mailbox, waiting for a reply for my fan letter to the guy who played Danny Tanner on Full House.
I was obsessed with his beauty, his spell-binding charisma, and his unique talent of acting that transcended the mere medium of television. Alas, God had to go and destroy everything I held sacred.
The whispers among ABC executives that the Danny Tanner character was a closet homosexual proved too much for TGIF's broadcast standards, and Full House met an untimely death.
I ... see. Alyssa, how long will it take to get security in here?
It was about this time that the government started reading my brainwaves. I had to put mayonnaise on my bedroom window that night and sleep with a tin foil blanket to keep them out of my head.
Mr. Frederich, it's obvious to me that you suffer from bipolar manic depression with hints of a split personality. I recommend that you take this medication three times a day until further notice.
OOH, the pills are RED! Does that mean that they're extra strength or somethin'?
Josh takes one right away...
Dear God, and this kid graduated from Pekin High School? Note to self: never send the children to PCHS.
AAH!
What's this?!?! Evil Josh????
Oh, I almost forgot...There is a possibility of a severe side effect kicking in...
Whoa, those pants! Who's your fashion consultant, Helen Keller? And which dwarf are you supposed to be again?