All comics by Marcus_Tee

 

by Marcus_Tee
11-03-10
Geoff! Are you still attached to that weird thing?
Yeah. Looks like you got one too.
Not really. I got hit by a car.
Then what did *I* get hit by?

 

by Marcus_Tee
4-23-11
Hi Mom. Have you read my blog lately?
I'm not sure. What's a blog?
That's where I can post a cartoon about you and me and people can read it and laugh. It's really neat and I can even get paid if I add advertisements.
I'll be expecting a check.
Grrrr.

 

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
by Marcus_Tee, 5-03-11

 

My Dad got a brand new car for my Mom. Great trade, huh?
by Marcus_Tee, 5-03-11

 

There's no future in Time Travel.
by Marcus_Tee, 5-07-11

 

Hyperbole is the BEST THING EVER!
by Marcus_Tee, 5-07-11

 

My mom gave me a middle name,,, so I would know when I'm in trouble.
by Marcus_Tee, 5-27-11

 

This fog is so thick I can't see my own cataracts.
by Marcus_Tee, 5-27-11

 

Never get in the ring with two blind boxers.
by Marcus_Tee, 6-08-11

 

I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was blaming you.
by Marcus_Tee, 6-13-11

 

I'm starved! Let's go to McDonalds for a double chin and a side of thighs.
by Marcus_Tee, 6-13-11

 

On a scale of one to ten...You're a JERK!
by Marcus_Tee, 6-13-11

 

Just remember in chemistry class.. Never lick the spoon.
by Marcus_Tee, 6-13-11

 

To keep the dream alive, you need to hit the snooze button.
by Marcus_Tee, 6-13-11

 

Spock, huh? I don't get it.
by Marcus_Tee, 6-15-11

 

Are you not entertained?! Are you not entertained?! Is this not why you are heret?!
by Marcus_Tee, 6-20-11

 

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
by Marcus_Tee, 6-20-11

 

by Marcus_Tee
6-20-11
So you never went near the button?
Nope!
You're sure you never went near the shiny red button?
That's right!
You're sure you never went near the shiny red button that said "Restart from the beginning?"
well...

 

What do you mean, You forgot?
by Marcus_Tee, 6-21-11

 

This new generation's got me buffaloed. Last night my son came into *my room* and yelled at *me* to turn down my music!
by Marcus_Tee, 6-22-11

 

It's so hot that I saw two trees fighting over a dog.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-02-11

 

You know how you get Lady Gaga's attention? You Poker Face.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-04-11

 

My wife will buy anything marked down. Last year she bought an escalator.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-06-11

 

Did you ever get the feeling that the world was a tuxedo, and you were a pair of brown shoes?
by Marcus_Tee, 7-06-11

 

My Uncle is a hitman. Of course he *calls* himself a Family Tree Trimmer.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-11-11

 

That's the last time I'll stare at the sun without protection... from oncoming traffic.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-12-11

 

He's not dead. He's electroencephalographically challenged.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-13-11

 

When my dad finally found Miss Right he didn't know her first name was "Always."
by Marcus_Tee, 7-13-11

 

I couldn't repair your brakes. so I made your horn louder.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-13-11

 

In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-13-11

 

You like my shoes? I got them at the bowling alley for 85 cents.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-13-11

 

My brother says he's intercontinental. Yeah, he's wet himself all over the world.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-13-11

 

I hope you're heading to the paint store...'cause you need to get thinner!
by Marcus_Tee, 7-21-11

 

Head Cheese? It's no Gouda.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-21-11

 

The trouble with doing nothing is, you can't stop and rest.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-21-11

 

Always take life with a grain of salt...plus a slice of lemon and a shot of tequila.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-21-11

 

A Bus Station is where a bus stops. A Train Station is where a train stops. Right here on my desk I have a Work Station...
by Marcus_Tee, 7-21-11

 

Last night I dreamed I was a muffler...I woke up this morning exhausted!
by Marcus_Tee, 7-21-11

 

Well, I finally have enough money to last me the rest of my life without working...as long as I'm dead by 9 PM Monday.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-21-11

 

by Marcus_Tee
7-22-11
Jon, I want you to have Grandpa's wheelchair.
Sure, Granny.
Why are you in Grandpa's wheelchair?
Granny said I could have it.
You *know* what that means when she *gives* you something.
Okay, I'll go put it in the garage until she asks for it back.

 

Un choco-latte, por favor.
?
by Marcus_Tee, 7-25-11

 

Does this cubicle make me look dead inside?
by Marcus_Tee, 7-20-12

 

Don't get me wrong. I have no beef with vegetarians.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-20-12

 

Don't glare at me lady! You're the one who named your kid Marco then yelled his name in the store!
by Marcus_Tee, 7-21-12

 

My time machine and I go way back
by Marcus_Tee, 7-25-12

 

I come from a long line of people waiting to get in.
by Marcus_Tee, 7-25-12

Showing page 1.