All comics by erik911pb

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by erik911pb
7-20-08
You and I have so much in common.
I guess.
We like the same music, the same foods, we even like the same art.
I'm not really that into paintings.
I know, but I saw you looking at that statue of Artemis.
I was looking at Adonis.

 

by erik911pb
7-20-08
Do you have any tattoos?
I have one, on my ass.
What is it?
It's just text. It seemed clever when I was 22 but now i'm embarrased to show it.
What does it say?
Enter here.

 

by erik911pb
7-20-08
What was your first time like?
He was Thai. He wanted to be on top and I thought, what the hell, he's not going to do any damage. He actually had the audacity to ask if it hurt.
I take it it didn't.
It did. He wasn't much more experienced than I was.
I don't understand.
He had it in my eye.

 

by erik911pb
7-21-08
It's so nice of you to visit me at work.
What is it you do here?
Risk management.
I might be better at that than you are.
What makes you say that?
I could have told you you could never pull those shoes off.

 

by erik911pb
7-21-08
Where were you on Saturday night?
I was at home watching the Affliction pay per view.
You don't strike me as a big MMA fan.
MMA combines two of my favourite things: current trends and men humping each other.
If only they were allowed to wear shoes.

 

by erik911pb
8-06-08
I don't get hit on often.
I can't imagine why.
Do you think I'm attractive?
If I may quote the great love song by Frankie Valli.
The sight of you leaves me weak.

 

by erik911pb
8-09-08
Now I don't want you to think that just because I'm black you have to treat me differently.
I wouldn't.
I've earned this job on my merits and I like to get by without my skin color being an issue.
It won't be an issue.
Will it be an issue with the others?
No. There's only three people in the office. You, me and Ken the nigger hater.

 

by erik911pb
8-11-08
Didn't you used to date a pro footballer?
Yes but it didn't last long.
What happened?
I caught him in a lie.
What did he lie about?
He told me he was a tight end.

 

by erik911pb
8-14-08
In an effort to be more like my hero Karl Pilkington I have decided to keep a diary. Karl is my hero because he's British and I'm not.
I woke up today at the crack of dawn. She woke up not long after. My one regret about being openly gay is that I can not use that joke effectively.
For breakfast I had Marmite on toast. I don't like the taste of Marmite but having a foreign sandwich spread gives you remarkable cred.
I was speaking with a man named Alan who had never heard of Marmite. He must now think I am superior to him and will probably buy a jar to be like me. If he even knows where to get it.
At the end of the day I decided to write about what happened today. I will put it on stripcreator for everyone to see. I hope they are impressed by my Marmite story.
Hello.

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