All comics by yaremis

 

by yaremis
11-30-07
whatever
whatever
whatever

 

by yaremis
11-30-07

 

by yaremis
11-30-07

 

by yaremis
11-30-07
please i want to be more desirable.how much do i have to pay you?
nothing ! its free!
chumgabunga palunga!
danm it ! i knew it was too good to be true!
done!

 

by yaremis
11-30-07
yes hannah i will make all your homework and let you copy from my quizzes , but tell me do i get a date with you?
NO
Oh...Ok
see ya!
Myspace bulletin:Being a nice guy sucks! and bitches like hannah should walk in heavy trafick!!

 

by yaremis
11-30-07
calling god
please hold while we try to connect with the almighty (music starts) na na na la la la
we are sorry but god is busy counting cows!
Before you hear the annoying music again please hang up and stop making a fool out of yourself!

 

by yaremis
11-30-07
going to school.
Planting trees..
being suspicious of hippie...
i will definitly say no to your crap!

 

by yaremis
12-18-07
Jesus Christ that shirt is hurting my eyes!
its a flag!
no wonder!

 

And when budgets are tights...
i need money NOW!!! will you lend me some?
Excuse me? i thought you were just an imaginary friend!
by yaremis, 12-18-07

 

by yaremis
12-18-07
you are sinful son of the devil for being a sexual deviant! a hundred ave marias for penitance and a "oh save me lord" money offering
hello there looking good

 

by yaremis
12-19-07
Tell me Miss Patrick, how smart is doing my son at school?
Oh he is very smart allright!
i knew it ! isnt he one of a kind!
thats funny ! i thought the same when he was talking about his mom while doing the loser gesture with his right hand!

 

In a society where everything has become hot.Hot-mail, hotdogs and hot people , she just had it!
hey you are hot!!
and what the hell is that supposted to mean? did i just come out of microwave or what?
by yaremis, 12-19-07

 

by yaremis
12-20-07

 

by yaremis
12-25-07
and how do you feel about the new gay generation?
it reminds me of bad testing medicine for kids!
disgusting?
no totally about about to change to a new cherry flavor so that everybody likes it!

 

by yaremis
12-25-07
Rickie , do you know where are you going to spend eternity?
who cares?
Me.you are going to spend it with me talking about jesus!
oh men just lay off the heavenly cocaine and then you can come and preach to me .ok?
You had me at cocaine........

 

im pregnant
So what?im miss universe , everybody wants to f*uck me and i have nine months of free cosmetics and botox , but you dont hear me bragging about it b*itch!
by yaremis, 12-25-07

 

by yaremis
12-25-07
and now we are about to know whos is the real playboy bunny that has posed for so many years in that horrible shirt you are wearing right now.Tell us mister , how you came to be so popular?
bunny play with boys..
err...ok ..i will make you another question , what do you have to say to the people who wear your brand?
boys please dont eat bunnies and buy my damn magazine too!
That was just bad advice for gay people and meat eaters , but anyways ..is there something left to do now that you are famous?
Yes!Bunny wants to kill not so playful reporter boy!

 

by yaremis
12-26-07
may i help you?
yes , my name is satan and i need therapy , becuase evil go cuckoo too you know that ?
what happened during your childhood?
kicked from heaven , my feelings have been hurt for centuries , so much that i punish mortals by sending them to hell!
I will break it mortal style for ya Having the right to have your feelings' does not mean the right to act like a raging asshole.and thats gonna be $50 bucks!
you are next on my list

 

by yaremis
12-26-07
Remember what i told you to tell the police when they get here.
How can i forget it!:Mattew was getting laid by me yesterday , mattew was getting laid by me yesterday , mattew was getting laid by me yesterday
so ..do you have any idea where mattew was yesterday?
?
Sometimes you have to learn how to open your mouth for more than just giving head.
Oops..

 

by yaremis
12-26-07
Face it! all you want from me it's a cheap dinner that will pay off with good sex afterwards..
Mmmm sounds like a good idea!
PIG!
H*OE!
Guess what ? i was expecting a rich guy with the sexual drive of a robot, obviously not our lucky day..!
Fine. lets call it a TIE!

 

by yaremis
1-07-08
Oh my god you look so freaking hot today!If it wasnt because im gay i will definitly marry you !Danm your comics are to die for laughing hahhahha lol you are so funny and that black liner rocks!
?
Henry are you watching harry potter too much too often?
Maybe.....why you asking so my sweetie pie?
cuz you look like an irrational idiot trying to be nice so that i dont put spells on you to have accidents!
Touche

 

by yaremis
1-07-08
This is the reaper and i have come to inform you that your time is close!
Oh no thats terrible , do i have at least the right to know how am i gonna die?
on a bus accident , because u have no car!
Not really ,With 1-800-BAR-NONE you can be preapproved in minutes for financing!

 

by yaremis
1-09-08
Aliens from planet borzon are happy to have you here! please have a seat in our Mothership !
Wow ! that alien is very polite!
Sure and he also knows spanish , english , and and he’s bilingual too!

 

by yaremis
1-09-08
And the weather for today : totally sunny , with totally hot temperatures and totally telling you are going to be totally sweaty today!
5 minutes later...
Boooooh!
Well what the hell were you expecting, Predictions are difficult, especially about the future!

 

by yaremis
1-09-08
We are unable to announce the weather. We depend on weather reports from the airport, which is closed, due to weather...
Whether we will be able to give you a weather report tomorrow will depend on the weather.

 

Radio Traffic Report plays on
Traffic is very heavy at the moment, so if you are thinking of leaving now, you'd better set off a few minutes earlier!
by yaremis, 1-09-08

 

by yaremis
1-09-08
Wicca
Spirit of fire i summon you! Come to my call!
but ..im just a fire
christianity
My beloved jesus please i pray that tomorrow i have i divine intervention so i can pay my rent
Well maybe if i were alive i would help you...
New Age
After Gaia collapse dont forget to take us in your ship to our real home where enlightment process will finally take place..
Stupid jerk

 

by yaremis
1-10-08
i feel like summoning a demon today! Lets do it!
Err ..but doesnt our path says that demons dont exist , then how come we can summon one now?
Really ? but solomon lesser keys says otherwise!
i guess he is talking about evil spirits , not demons!
Hmm i dunno but last time i call on an evil spirit he stealed my cookies and run away from me when i say the word jesus!
Damn it !

 

by yaremis
1-13-08
did you see those terrorists on tv ? they Threatened us with doing another terrorist attack worse than the twin towers!Omg what are gonna do?
Uhhm like ..chill out man!
mister bush , did you see those terrorists on tv ? they Threatened us with another terrorist attack worse than the twin towers , Omg what are you gonna do?
Uhhmm like ..chill out man

 

by yaremis
1-13-08
Can't help it,The girl can't help it oh baby,Can't help it,The girl can't help it oh baby,cant help it..
You got me trippin oh, stumbling oh, flippin oh, fumbling oh
You know, this isn't the first time this has happened to me,My world is crushed and I'm all alone,The love bug crawls right back up and bites me and I'm back.

 

by yaremis
1-19-08
So i was having a conversation with a well educated man about relationships...
About how some men that know the science of getting and then dropping off women , and that one day i was going to be swept off my feet , literally by one of them .....
But what The mister in its education didnt know is that i got a Danm good pair of shoes , impossible for me to be swept off my feet and lose my balance , literally!

 
by yaremis, 1-19-08

 

by yaremis
1-19-08
Woah i guess being a pimp takes a lot of hoes ,
not as much as hippies who takes a lot of drugs

 

by yaremis
1-19-08
Then after eating those chunkyhamburgers , fatty icecreams , and greasy pizza i realized something ...
That you are fat and its time to start a diet ?
No , that i had forgotten i had more in the refrigerator!

 

by yaremis
1-19-08
So my girlfriend totally blew me off when i complained about her big toes , crooked teeth and that annoying big black hair on her back , what ya think?
Still better than you?
hey how do you know? thats what she said!

 

by yaremis
1-19-08
Drinking more pepsi , being stressed before and after sex , and becoming retired after some nut insurance company tells you you are old is what makes america "america"
then as more illegal inmigrants take over , the tomatoes on my cloned meat barely a hamburger taste like sweat , and strippers are really prostitutes in disguise !
impressed ?
no

 

by yaremis
1-20-08
Its one of those days ...
You wont believe the amazing advice cosmopolitan gives to single woman like me and you!
She couldnt believe her ears..
Specially on the "cheap , fast , and practical way to get a man " section ..
And the bomb exploted...
i learned that opening your legs on the first date , acting like a bimbo and doing all he tells me will keep me a long way from being single
and did you also notice that this magazine only costs $1.25 and that those people who write it make their money by preying on your insecurities?

 

by yaremis
1-20-08
I was having a drink by myself at the bar and suddenly this guy pops out of nowhere ..
He invited me to dance with him , and i replied no , so he kept on insisting i should dance with him or otherwise i would miss the opportunity to be seen with such hot sh*it on a stick...
I did agree with the s*hit part, though, but I definitely have my suspicions about that stick.

 

by yaremis
1-20-08
I have been around the world , Owner of the 5 most powerful companies in the world , be known by my physic abilities
So basically i have lot to bring to the table , blah , blah , blah , blah ....
keep talking your shit
Blah , blah , blah , blah , blah , blah , blah , blah , blah....
WoW ! i guess making excuses that give in instant ego boost is a terrible thing to waste !

 

by yaremis
1-20-08
Pay attention , this is what we are going to tell humanity so that our evil plans dont look as obvious as lucifer first did
im listening
Dear humans: As opposed as many believed sin doesnt exist , we learn trough mistakes and our race is here to help humanity to stop believing in such character as lucifer..
say what?

 

by yaremis
1-20-08
I'm here for Geico love. Lets not delve into my personal life!
AFLAC!
From family guy
Seriously peter , what the hell where you thinking when you thought that a talking dog will do the trick by stealing the spot from you?

 

by yaremis
1-28-08
And then they just ran over me like crazy ....
Hey lizie did you know that you have such a sweet french accent when you speak
People tell me that i have a british one!
Did you really think i wanted to hear i had a french accent?
.........

 

by yaremis
2-21-08
Dear Sucker : we are proudly making fun of your fake mustache and your shorts shorts ...
please notice that before we destroy your self-steem completely we are going to keep teasing you about your short shorts
Truly never yours :Daddy longlegs!

 

by yaremis
2-21-08
After an extensive research into Norman head our crew decided hes a Paranoid Schizophrenic and thats why suppostly cucumbers are banging donuts everytime he opens the refrigerator!
sorry to break it to ya but your crew is screwed to even believe it is a matter of only one person to be that f*ucked up , it is society fault , hes alright !
No way, hes sick , hes sick , hes sick
Of course not , society is sick , society is sick, society is sick...
can we still agree that we both like red ties?
but is just because society expect us to!

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