All comics by GrugNBirk

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by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
yarr!
OH REALLY CLOWN?!
And again the skull is alone.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
Disaster has struck...
Yarr it would seem I crashed me ship. If only I was with another pirate I could survive. Yarr!
Im a pirate! Marr!
Umm its Yarr.... "yarr". Push your tougne against the roof of your mouth. "Yarr"
Larr! Barr! Karr! Tarr!
..and the skull has no friends.
hmm... rarr... parr.... jarr... mmm pickles

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
rock rock rock rock rock rock rock.
you're quite the rocker.
thanks-
OH REALLY CLOWN?!!?!!
Its just another love song

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
It begins....
OH REALLY CLOWN?!?!?!?!?
Umm I havnt said anything yet skull
...and continues....
OH REALLY CLOWN?!?!?!?!?
Your getting ahead of yourself...now be quiet...
...and ends.
OH REALLY CLOWN?!?!?!?!?
Thats better. Hey did we switch places?

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
so whats up?
not much. ...
..can we switch back?
hooray.
pussussy.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
Dont blink....
Watch this trick....first Im here...
Uh-oh...
... you fucking blinked.
getting confused......
Now we are here!
Oh well its for the better.
Now we are back!
...too confused.... it stings...

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
neat, you exploded.
yeah, well........... INFLUENZO!!
AAAHHHHHH!!!!!
hehe
God is on the radio!
i didnt know you went to Hogwarts
im an enigma wrapped in a riddle inside a secret burrito.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
Another day in the life of pirate and skull.
Sometimes I fight people and they dont even know im fighting them. They tottally dont pay attention or anything so I run my ship up next to theirs and im all like "HEY GET OUT YO SWORD!"...
uh huh
...and hes all like "but im on your side" and im all like " I dont care fool get out you sword!" and hes all like" but I dont want to fight" and im all like "you just know your going to lose"
story...boring... cant..focus
Hey HENNEY is on Conan.
Your voice...annoyed.. BREAKS ME!! whoa breaks me... two weeks today you let me goOo whoa. Dont need me now but your not alone!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
.....wait a second. emo sucks!
*Something something girfriend ooooh-oooooh-whoooaaaa*
*Whoo-oooaa oh baby, no, yes. oh im going to cry wooooaaahhh*
In the fade.
*Whooaaaa oh ba* Hey, what the fuck? "INFLUENZA!!!" Aaaahhh!!! "Now for you, Conan!" No! Im Conan! "Bah, INFLUENZA!!" Aaaahhh!!!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
That night at the conan o brien show....
Oh No! Skull has turned me into a pile of ash with his INFLUENZO spell.
I Must use my Emo powers to turn myself back.
Hmm its too late to save conan but being a pile of talking ash seems to be helping his ratings.
Hey its been a great show folks! Next week dont miss A Day At The Fair! Good Night!
...to be continued.
Now to save Emo from Skull!
God Henney makes me wet

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
And at the evil skull hideout..
*i sit in my easy chair*
*ive got so much time to spare*
..Skull sings..
*because i know! in a future day....*

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
Hey man arnt you like supposed to be out savin emo or something Henney? Yeah thats wild man. Trippy.
Yeah yeah. Please Im Henney Ill get around to it. Hey look 13 year old Emo girls that like to get fingerbanged by bands.
Just call me anytime. Your the only one that calls. The phone seems broken until you call on friday night
Damnit why did he have to sing I just changed my pants. Mmmmm....
The war will still be there when Henney gets back.
mmm your fingers are sooo nimble
its from guitar baby.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
Skull goes out on the town.
Hey, can i get some crack?
Dude, im like 13.
...I have a gold chain...
Ok, this'll get you a 20 bag.
hooray.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
Add 2 cups of water...
Doot doot doot... oh ....what?....hey skull.....
Huh who what?! Oh... hello Henney....
...one cup of cornstarch...
So I guess like in the name of emo I should destroy you or something.
Can you give me 30 seconds to get to my secret lab?lab
...and the plot thickens....
Yeah sure I could care less I need to get some new shirts from goodwill anyway.
Shit I cant remember grugs number.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-21-02
Sky...
*puff*whoa*wheeze* lucky i had my hoverboard... ok, PHONONENZO!
Is....
*doot, doot, doot* hey grug, come here.
ok.
Falling...
that was fast.
yeah, lucky i had my hoverboard

 

by GrugNBirk
12-22-02
The next morning....
Wow that was really amazing. I've never came that hard before.
Yeah I bet. Look heres your purse. I gotta go save emo now.
Are you going to call?
Umm probably not you know...ill be too busy saving emo...or something.
Gee, I thought you wanted to go out.
Yeah sorry I didnt mean to lead you on by fucking you.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-22-02
And at the evil emo-hating skull lab...
*jum around, jump around- you check this out!*
woo!
woo!
..Japanese rap-metal.
woo!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-22-02
So Henney my main man where are we headed?
I dont know I just need to walk. I like tottally was calling Maura all day and she was all like not anwsering her phone so I think she was with Doug which makes her a meanie.
Oh....why hello jive-filled man of colour.
You look like an emo kiddie. I would avoid Skulls anti emo hideout over the ridge. I hear hes got himself a donkey named Grug.
Hmm I wonder if the cops are arresting Skull for having sex with that nice donkey.
They are here fo' me. Yous best be avoiding that anti-emo lair if you knows whats goods for ya.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-22-02
Doobie do wah
we have kidnapped random emo groupie #1!!!
LOLOL!!11!
Bee-ba-ba-bada-bo
omg!
you guys are like, total morons.
OMG WTF!!
how would you like to be RAPED BY A DONKEY!!!
YOWZA!!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-23-02
Hey man Grug and Skull like tottally kidnapped your girlfriend
Oh thats why shes gone. I thought she dumped me. I even wrote a song about it. Wanna hear?
Not right now man. You need to go to skull and grugs fortress and stop them! I hear they are building a super weapon that will wipe out all emo on this planet!
Who? What? Oh yeah. Whoa. I guess I better like stop him for good. Thanks Mikal. I will start looking for his base right away.
Oh my god! Henney! I just overheard a pizza delivery guy talking! He told me the address to Skull and Grugs base.
Oh really? Well perhaps you would like to exchange that information for sex...or perhaps...sex?

 

by GrugNBirk
12-23-02
D
OMG!! We have created teh ultimo weapon of death!!
LOLOL!!
O
Behold!! What looks like an ordinary mike is actually teh ultra death mike- of death!!
G
LOLOL!!
LOLOL!!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-23-02
In a far off land, beyond the reach of mortal men.
Hey where have you taken me? I was about to get some.
Henney. I am Jeremy Enigk of Sunny Day Real Estate. I have brought you here to my Emo lair to tell you what you must do to beat grug. Many years ago Emo Ninjas such as youself and emo pirates fought
...
...side by side. Now you must find the sole remaining Emo Pirate and join forces. Its your only hope of defeating Grug and Skull. May the angst be with you. I wil now transport you to him.
*POOF*
Than-- hey what? Oh its you... are you the sole remaining Emo Pirate?
Yarr!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
And the ultimo weapn is put into practice...
uh, testing? 1 2 3, yeeeaa boooyeeee and stuff.
...on japanese children
So-Deska! and stuff.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
And so...
yarr!
Hey wait. I know you. Your the sole remaining emo pirate arnt you!?
...and alliance if formed...
*sniff* yarr * sniff*
Jeremy Engik of Sunny Day Real Estate told me about you but Ive always thought it was just a myth. We need to join forces to defeat grug and skull. They are using the ultimo weapon on little girls!
...that will last for at least 2 more comics.
Yar *sniff sniff*
Hey I like your style. Here sing backup vocals for me. Doo doot doo doo doot Sunday Rainstorms and days when you hated all. When you notice disasters come fast. And hours go slow. Count all the wet...

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
and so..
um, whapa-p'chang
...the destruction...
...commenced. Whapa-p'chang.
cool.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
Hey Pirate. I just heard that grug is going around with his new ultimato weapon and he has destoryed the Emo headquarters in New Jersey. We have to go!
Yarr! Lets go!
*emo teleport!*
Yarr! This time grug has gone too far. I can tell you this for sure. Grug Aint Gettin no Hug.
Your poetic prose is brilliant. You try and track down grug while I go to a gig. That will keep the forces of Emo strong in these dark times. Hopefully I can give you enough time. Good luck.
Tune in next time folks!
This isnt my normal mic. I hope I sound good through it.
HeHe

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
merry everything.
Yarr!!! Merry Christmas!
yarr!!
Yarr!!
Yarr!!
Yarr!!
Yarr!!
yarr!!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
The end is near for our heros.
Hmmm it would seem that grugs Ultimo Weapon wasnt strong enough to defeat my Emo power. After all I am a descendant of Jeremy Enigk of Sunny Day Real Estate.
AHH!
Pirate and Henney bravely march on to Grugs secret hideout...
So here we are in grug and skulls secret hideout. Where could they be?
Yarr...wha?
See title.
Skull?
Pirate?! What are you doing here?

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
we're on the moon.
OH REALLY CLOWN!!?!
...
...uh
GOOSE FEATHERS
that was predictable.
meh.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
im sorry. im a jerk and i have jerk issues that i cant handle.
you have hurt my feelings and i am unconvinced that you are sorry.
look, im really sorry. i never meant for anything to piss you off or hurt you feelings. i really like frankys sofa.
screw you asshole.
fuck. fuck fuck fuck. fuck.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
The dream is gone.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-24-02
Im sorry I got in a fight with you over nothing really. I cant contorl my hurt sometimes.
Sok....
Well that was easy enough.
Yeah...so I wonder what pirate and skull are up to?
Trust me you dont want to see.
Skull-fuck me!
Yarr! *squirt squir* ungh!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-30-02
Forums are too slow...
BLAROO!
MAMA MIA!

 

by GrugNBirk
12-30-02
You look strong.
I guess..yeah
Could you kill a man with your BEAR hands?! Hahahaha....
Im a bull.
So I guess sex is out of the question...
Sorry Grug will be here any minute.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-30-02
wakka wakka wakka

 

by GrugNBirk
12-30-02
I think Boddah hates me.
Maybe its because your an annoying peice of emo shit. Now bend over the bed bitch..
*SLAM*
Was it something I said?

 

by GrugNBirk
12-30-02
*sub* Why donna' gruga' treata' me right? *sob*
boo.
uh..
...um

 

by GrugNBirk
12-30-02
Whysa amsa Isa talkinsa liksa thisa sosa suddensa. Itsa gettingsa worsesa
...
Its because you choose to talk like this. Because you and grug think your funny. But neither of you are.
Oh. Makes sense. Wanna have sex?
Love to.

 

by GrugNBirk
12-30-02
...and then there was sex.
UNGH! UNGH!
OH YEAH! IM 13! OH BABY!
HUFF! TAKE ALL OF THIS DONKEY COCK!!
AAHHH!!! OHH FUCK!! WOO!!
UNGH! OHH YEEEAA!!
god damn fuck.

 

by GrugNBirk
1-03-03
Hows it goin Grug?
i mput my microphone INSIDE MY GUITAR
Ummm... what?
Ah nothing. Its fun though.
Neat. I like stuff.
Woooooooooooooooooooo! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

by GrugNBirk
1-03-03
why are we in the desert?
because we play desert stoner rock, like kyuss
no we dont. we dont play anything, i dont even really know you. i dont even like kyuss
muh
....why are we in compton?
Fuck tha' Police.

 

by GrugNBirk
1-03-03
Shit its the police! Run!
Fuck Da Police!
Fuck! Theyve got us cornered!
I got our back!
Ok admit it you lied.
Fuck Da Police!

 

by GrugNBirk
1-08-03
i think the fact that im a donkey makes this comic a lot funnier than it actually is.
maybe
where we goin?
somewhere
excellent

 

by GrugNBirk
1-10-03
I haxxored the system!!!!!!!
yay

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