All comics by Link182

 

by Link182
3-08-04
My mommy always told me not to talk to strangers
But I have candy
Oh ok, if you say so mr Bowser
yes, another innocent boy to molest
so, wheres the candy
if by candy you mean sexual molesting kit than in my pocket

 

by Link182
3-10-04
Manuel and Ava talk about some random crap
I want to adopt a baby, and give him back when he learns to talk
I dont think thats legal....
pshh I don't care, Ill make it legal
you're a horrible person inside....
if you prefer I could keep the kid and neglect him.
A horrible horrible person...

 

by Link182
3-10-04
Your not a ninja!!!
Then why am I dressed like one!!
Because you're an idiot
oh....but I know karate
no, no you don't
ouch....I'll go sit down now...

 

by Link182
3-11-04
Why manuel and arron are not allowed to talk to each other
Im an astronaut!!
Im a ninja!!
I'm cooler
no I am
five hours later...
NO I AM!!!
GO TO HELLL ASS MONKEY, I AM!!!

 

by Link182
3-11-04
please dont
I kill you
But killing me is againtst the code!!
You would like that wouldnt you, but you know what I don't care I do what I want with who I want when I want
ahhhh
was that against the code too?

 

by Link182
3-11-04
hello
I kill you
why....?
Because I do what I want when I want with who I want
ahhhh help me it burns
haha sucker

 

by Link182
3-15-04
I decided to take off my ninja outfit
Because you decided you looked like an idiot?
No
Oh, then why?
Because I decided to become a hitman
I'd be scared, but that's a water gun

 

by Link182
3-17-04
what you looking for?
Nothing, but can I interest you in getting lost?
Your mean
yeah about that....kick in the shin!!!
ow that almost hurt
whats that, you want me to shoot off your kneecap?

 

by Link182
3-17-04
I decided I didn't want to be a duck anymore.
That's wierd......
So what else is new?
Nothin much, just that we are in hell and stuff
oh, well that kind of sucks
yeah I guess, but Im running for overtaking satan so it might be fun

 

by Link182
3-17-04
A typical conversation between manuel and izzy
Why are you dressed like a hippie?
why are you such a woman?
Your mom...
I'm going to kill you!!!
WHAT SHE'S HOT!!
I'M GOING TO RIP OF YOUR FACE YOU WOMAN!!!

 

by Link182
3-19-04
Im dancing on the tile floor, Im dancing on the tile floor
shes gone insane....
Im dancing on the tile floor, Im dancing on the tile floor
what the hell is wrong with her....oh well might as well join
Im dancing on the tile floor, Im dancing on the tile floor
Im dancing on the tile floor, Im dancing on the tile floor

 

by Link182
3-19-04
omg its me
holy shit thats cool
so whats up
ur mom haha
thats it ur dead
not if I take you with me biznatch

 

by Link182
3-23-04
Hey guess what?!!
You have a deadly disease?
no....
oh...well then what?
I found a shiny penny!!
You're gods way of punishing me...

 

by Link182
3-28-04
I just had a pepperoni pizza.
eww I hate meat
Please don't tell me your one of those crazy people who think killing animals is wrong
No, animals suck they should die, I just don't like the taste of meat.
I love you
Don't make me kill you.

 

by Link182
3-29-04
Hey Aaron
It's Arron not Aaron.
That's what I said...
No, you said Aaron, but my name is Arron.
Oh sorry
You better be or I'll kill you

 

by Link182
3-31-04
Locked in a battle to the death Nathan and Manuel fight for the right to be called the coolest pimpest motha in the west and east and everything in between that's right I don't need no period biznatch
Karate chop!!!
Don't make me kill you.
Judo kick...of doom!!!
I'm seriously going to kill you
See now you made me use my heat vision of sexiness

 

by Link182
4-01-04
Come one come all and hear the story of a heroine named Nicole
fear not bald midget man I will save you
What are you talking about?
I will save you from the evil wizard
But he's a good wizard....he saved us from starvation which was your fault. You burned all the crops after claiming they were tainted by the devil
Don't worry I will leave and kill the evil wizard
Why doesn't anyone listen to me?

 

by Link182
4-02-04
After walking for days our hero finnaly finds the wizard
It's you!!
Hello nicole, I've heard of your mighty fighting style. I've heard of how you once killed five men with a single cat and how you killed another man with a rabid hamster, but I will never lose!!
I think you are wrong, I have one more trick up my sleeve, how bout I throw a rock at your shin!!!
No not my enchanted shin!! For that you will pay
Ok, I know you're pissed and stuff but did you really have to blow up all of the grassland.
No, but it adds a dramatic effect

 

by Link182
4-03-04
I will now use my secret move of dooooooooooooooom!!
Yeah well I've got a plunger, now what?
After five hours of yelling at each other the two finally fight.
hiyaaa kick in the shin!!!
NOOOOOO not my enchanted shin!!!
Back at home
Hello midget bald man, I am back from my journey.
I can't believe the wizard was evil and this idiot was the one who killed him

 

by Link182
4-03-04
It's wierd....
what is?
Its like someones missing....like someones not here
Yeah it's quiet....too quiet
Man this void really sucks, I wish I had a candy bar or two

 

by Link182
4-05-04
Manuel and Nathan fight to the death yet again.
And now a battle to the death!
zzt buzz ztt
karate chop...of super doom
Ahhh my arm...sucker I can't feel pain! sexy laser beams!!
And so the battle ends...for now
AHHHH!!! my shin, you cheap bastard you shot my shin. Who shoots people in the shin? I mean really why not my eyes why my shin!!
zzt buzz zzt

 

by Link182
4-07-04
Manue, what the hell are you doing?
The name is Sir Manuel to you.
This is one of the dumbest things you've ever done.
What about the time I superglued my hand to my forehead, or when I dressed like a hitman and got arrested, or when I tried to insert magnets into my hands so I wouldn't lose my keys.
Come to think of it, this is one of the lesser of your dumb deeds
Thank you, now if you excuse me I must slay hippies

 

by Link182
4-19-04
So, this is hell?
Yup.
Why'd I end up here anyway?
Do I really have to answer that?
oh right, the sinning...
Well yeah.

 

by Link182
4-20-04
How did we end up in space?
How am I supposed to take over the world from earth, I have to be in a spaceship. duh.
Why can't we be on earth?
Cause I said so, don't make me kill you.
For this mission I will have to be in ninja form
see now thats what I call a good henchman, now go attack that secret agent who is trying to break in.

 

by Link182
4-20-04
You need your own theme song
yeah, make one for me!!
Her name is Nicole, she can kick your ass into the grass because she is so cool!!! She can kill you with a mouse, and she will squah you under a house, so don't fuck with her cause she will fucking..
Um...you don't need all the cursing.
ok, how bout...Nicole is so cool she can kill you with a hamster and she will give you herpes with her mind powers...of doom
I hate you so much...

 

by Link182
4-22-04
karate chop!!
oww
haha sucker now you will die!
You think so? You are nothing but a nameless henchman. I am A secret agent who do you think will win?
Ha! My name is manuel now what?
Oh you're good...

 

by Link182
4-22-04
Now it's time to kick your ass!
Why do you always have to fight? Is it cause you weren't loved as a child?
yes...*cries*
Its ok*pat pat*
haha sucker *sets on fire*
Oh my god, this is the worst pain ever!!!!

 

by Link182
4-25-04
Monkey I'm sad.
oohh-ahhh-ohh
I know monkey...but see I need money so I have to kill CIA agents.
ohh-ahhh
I see, so if I don't kill CIA agents I will look weak and become a hippie instead of a ninja...wow this blows.

 

by Link182
4-25-04
I'm the one who tricked you into coming on here..I told you there was candy on the ship.
Hey, how'd you get in here?
That's a shame...a real shame.
Oh yeah. You point to some posion....I ate three tablets but I didn't die.
Well I guess that's better than nothing.
I also can't see out of my left eye anymore.

 

by Link182
4-29-04
My plan to take over the world is complete...
Ok what is it that I have to do?
Here's a bag of pretzel's take them to the white house, I think you know what to do from there.
Do not worry, ninja manuel will complete the task
In news today a man dressed as a ninja tried to kill the president by throwing pretzels at him, one pretzel got lodged in the throat of the president but he survived. The ninja is still at large, and
is believed to be extremly dumb.

 

by Link182
4-29-04
See the thing about me is there is two mes, dumbass me and one who speaks spanish.
So can you be both personalities at once?
Nope, just one.
So you are smart when you talk spanish?
Yup...
So that's why you never speak spanish around us...

 

by Link182
5-02-04
Inside the mind of Manuel
So these are all of Manuel's personalities
yup, look there's crazy knight, and some killer guy and even a monkey!!
Inside the mind of Manuel
what's up with that spanish looking guy in the corner
I think it's his spanish side, hes scared of white people
Inside the mind of Manuel
ooh--ahhh-ahh-oh-ahh
Ahh leave me alone....

 

by Link182
5-04-04
Manuel why the hell aren't you wearing your trademark trenchcoat?
A bird stole it...
But there are no birds for miles
He was one of those plastic ones that people put on their front lawns.
zing..
Did your mom take any drugs while she was pregnant with you?
a couple...

 

by Link182
5-06-04
Help me, I got arrested...
what did you do?
I didn't do anything wrong..
What did you do???!!!
I set Tom on fire...
oh, well I guess I'll bail you out then

 

by Link182
5-10-04
Manuel why are you covered in blood?
I had a slight arguement with arron
Guess what!!! I found a green flashlight!!
yeah, that's mine...
so you attacked him for a flashlight....?
I really liked that flashlight.

 

by Link182
5-16-04
Why are you happy? You know I have rules against that!
Sorry...its just that I got a new knife!!
oh...I never want to see it.
It's so cool, and it's sharp. Did I mention it's sharp. So sharp it can cut someone's face off without a problem!
Nicole? Where'd you go???

 

by Link182
5-17-04
Hello.
Hi
You aren't very scary for a ghost.
boo!!! argh....well maybe I'm not, but you aren't very good at being a hero seeing as how I'm still alive...
firstly you are a ghost so you are dead, second *jumps on top of ghosts head* haha sucker

 

by Link182
9-15-04
Since the beginning of time a force has controlled the world, a force so powerful, so kickass it could only have been....
God...and God created Manuel who kicked ass too.
I'm back, this time with twice the violence, and half the story.
Coming September 2004, The story that will piss some people off a lot, and make others cry, and make others yet laugh their asses off until they die

 

by Link182
9-16-04
Hey.
Manuel can I defenestrate you?
...Is that like rape or something?
Shut up! It means I want to throw you out the window!!!
oh...well in that case no.
you're mean, I hate you.

 

by Link182
9-20-04
Why is it a nuclear wasteland...good question I don't know.
If I had a dollar for everytime someone tried to kill me I'd be rich.
If I had a dollar for everytime someone called me sexy I'd be a billionaire.
Or do I?
.....
.....
One thing is certain, nathan is sexy according to a billion people.
No, just no.
Jealous? I think so, because I am too sexy.

 

by Link182
1-03-05
a rumor starts
Did you hear, Jeff likes Louie
no way!
a rumor grows
Did you hear Jeff made out with louie!
No way!!
and this is how lives get ruined
Did you hear, Jeff and louie had anal sex, and louie gave jeff head, and louie has aids, and now jeff has aids and now they both are dying
wow this rumor is growing and growing...

 

by Link182
1-12-05
There is an endless field of grass
Remember that one time I got addicted to heroin
Yeah it was yesterday.
why because I got bored
Oh yeah!
...
and the heroin has made my brain numb.
I'm so cold
you're an idiot, go away.

 

by Link182
1-13-05
Manuel I've been noticing a disturbing trend in your comics.
wha-what is it?
You're just not funny anymore, I'm sorry.
I'm still funny...I can still bring you laughs...
No, your last comic was almost as bad as a louie joke...
why...why do you have to be so cruel....?

 

by Link182
1-13-05
Manuel's dead.
What did you tell him, you were supposed to be easy on him.
I said his comic was as bad as a louie joke...
You did what?!Great, now we have to replace him with someone else, you always do this! You always tell someone they suck, or that they are useless, and then we have to replace them.
I know, now we have to find another dumb person who will make us look smart by comparasion...how about Emma?
God no, I'm not that desperate to replace him.

 

by Link182
1-14-05
So its been a day since Manuel died, it kind of sucks. We have no one to laugh at.
Yeah I know, I wonder where he's at right now?
Well not in heaven thats for sure.
I'm bored...enterain me. I'm tired, where's a bed. I'm hungry give me food. I want to watch tv...
Shut up now! I'm tired of your rambling, I shall punish you by making you listen to Creed.
Noooo! Oh god please forgive me!
Naw, I'm just kidding I'm not that cruel.

 

by Link182
9-01-05
You know you can reserve more than one copy of Nintendogs right?
Yeah...but I think I would lose too many man points if I bought two.
ouch.
Yeah...I only have 67 points left. I lost 650 after being exposed to mariah carrey's stupid "we belong together" song.
Well becareful, if you lose those last 67...
I know, I know I become...a homosexual *shudders*

 

by Link182
9-06-05
So I found out that I don't have any classes with all my peeps.
So? I have AIDs...in my toe!!
Why do you always have to make everything into a competition?
Because my mother didn't love me as a child
Dude...what the hell?
Actually I'm just an attention whore.

 

by Link182
3-02-06
erm hello?
hi, I am the alien from Signs
Why are you trying to take over a planet filled with your weakness?
We call that a plot hole...
And how is it that the Middle East, an area where there is very little water, was the first place to discover that you guys would die with a touch of water?
Shut up, that's how!

 

by Link182
3-13-06
Manuel why are you dressed like that?
um...
Don't tell me you are part of those loser cosplayers.
Well I actually went back in time, and in order to blend in I needed a suit of armor.
Zing...
That's the biggest load of crap I've ever heard.
No, the biggest load of crap you ever heard was Eminem

 

by Link182
3-20-06
So will lassie be all better?
Of course!
Minutes later
There was a slight problem with the operation...
And thats why I hate doctors.
Great, but that doesn't explain why you haven't showered in a week.

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