Chuck, even though you've somehow exceeded your sales quota by 300% we, Executive Management, have decided not to give you any commission.
There are many reasons for this that mainly have to do with with toodly doolity and fiddlely dee. I hope you understand and continue to show blind loyalty to us.
In other words, you are fucking me. Like, up the ass.
Actually we see it more as having relations with you in an uncomfortable way.
