All comics by SwssArmyRomantic

Profile

 

Eep! Scary guy!
Heyyyy, wanna go get drunk?
Umm..I'm straight edge.
Oh, so you wanna go get shit-faced?
Maybe next year...
Nah, I'll just go hang myself.

 

A girl sees a chicken on the road and tries to tell him a joke:
Hey chicken. What did one chicken say to the other chicken?
Umm..chickens can talk?
The chicken doesn't answer...
Chicken, how come you're not answering?
Cause chickens can't talk...
The chicken walks away...
Alright, fine then, get out of here!
Weird girl...

 

A girl sees a chicken on the road and tries to tell him a joke:
Hey chicken. What did one chicken say to the other chicken?
Umm..chickens can talk?
The chicken doesn't answer...
Chicken, how come you're not answering?
Cause chickens can't talk...
The chicken walks away...
Alright, fine then, get out of here!
Weird girl...

 

A girl sees a chicken on the road and tries to tell him a joke:
Hey chicken. What did one chicken say to the other chicken?
Umm..chickens can talk?
The chicken doesn't answer...
Chicken, how come you're not answering?
Cause chickens can't talk...
The chicken walks away...
Alright, fine then, get out of here!
Weird girl...

 

You're confusing.
No, you're confusing.
I know.
You confuse me.
I'm confused.
Ahhhhh!!!

 

So a fish walks into a bar and says, "Get me some water!"
Uhh...
So this little girl walks into a bar and says, "Ow."
Umm...
Is this thing ON?!
Tough crowd...

 

So a fish walks into a bar and says, "Get me some water!"
Uhh...
So this little girl walks into a bar and says, "Ow."
Umm...
Is this thing ON?!
Tough crowd...

 

One fine day...
Hey bird.
Hey hippo.
Hippo? How dare you say that?! I'm not a hippo!
You're not?!?! What are you?!
Remeber to choose your words carefully.
I'm an elephant dumbass!
Hey elephant dumbass!

 

I wish he'd kiss me.
I want to kiss you.
Kiss me then.
Ok.
I'm waiting...
I'm trying but I don't have legs so I can't get over there.

 

Hey dad, can I...
NO! YOU CANT! NO!!!!!!!!
But this is really important to me, you didn't even listen to wha...
THERE'S WEIRDO'S EVERYWHERE! NO!
But you're not liste..
YOU'RE GROUNDED! STAY IN YOUR ROOM!

 

Hey dad, can I...
NO! YOU CANT! NO!!!!!!!!
But this is really important to me, you didn't even listen to wha...
THERE'S WEIRDO'S EVERYWHERE! NO!
But you're not liste..
YOU'RE GROUNDED! STAY IN YOUR ROOM!

 

Hey Asef...I have a problem...
OH no...not this again...
It's about a boy...
Umm..I have a way to solve this. Hold on.
Is it by making hot passionate monkey sex?
Actually..yeah..

 

I've had such a rough day, I just gotta dance..
Dance it out, girlfriend!
Oh yeah look at me go, I'm a dancing machine!
Hellz YES!
Uh huh Uh huh Uh huh Uh huh Uh huh!
Hey, did you notice we never move?

 

This is supposed to be a drive-thru..
Hi Mam, Welcome to Burger King, Can I take your order??
WHOPPER!!!!!!!!!!!
Um...
and the pickles...
And the...pickles...?
OK Mam, appraently you want some pickles.
Chicken tenders, and special sauce ALL OVER MY BODY...

 

Girl meets boy.
So...you like candy?
I like candy.
Girl tries to boyhim over.
You can call me Cane, Candy Cane.
Umm..
Girl fails...
DO IT BITCH!
Just walk away slowly...

 

This is me and this is Joe.
I heart emo.
Yeah! Hardcore!

 

This is me and Joe.
I heart emo.
Yeah! Hardcore!
This is Asef and my favorite chicken.
I hate fake people.
Don't look at me, I speak Japanese.
This is some random kid, we'll call him Frank, and my dad.
What am I doing here?
Get your education then worry about boys!

 

This is what happened to me before.
*ring ring*
Hello?
Except the guy spoke Japanese.
Hola. Che pasa?!?! El gato es muy grande.
Umm..I think you have the wrong number...
But I don't know any Japanese.
No. No. El gato es muy grande.
No... *click*

 

One superbowl Sunday...
Hey Justin, wanna come over and we can drink beer?
Meghan..I'm straightedge..
ROOT BEER silly!
Ohhh sure! Let me just change into my cooler clothes.
Did anyone ever tell you that gray was your color?
You are the first. Let's get married!

 

Hey Squirrel, whats up?
You.
Hey Justin, what's up?
Me?
Hey Meghan, what's up?
My lack of comic making skills? Let's get married!

 

9 pm.
(types) Hey Clark Kent.
Clark Kent: Waso?!?!?!
12 am.
(types)We've been talking for 3 hours!!!
Clark Kent: No way!
2 am.
(types) New record. 5 hours.
Clark Kent: No way!!

 

She asks:
Is it a wind.....
...
..or a bug??
Hm..?
He knows:
...
It's a windorabug!!!

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