All comics by TeamLeon

 

by TeamLeon
3-10-07
Monday 10am
What exactly are you doing?
I'm trying to make a photocopy!
Friday 5pm
For fucks sake dude you've been here all week!WTF
I AM TRYING TO MAKE A PHOTOCOPY!!!!!
Christ....where the hell is Leon and his handcannon when you need him...

 

by TeamLeon
3-10-07
...so then this guy with really nice hair comes busting through the door, blows a hole the my box of spices, shoots Don Pedro seven times in the face, turns around and slashes me in the belly...
oh my
...then he blows up the back door to my house, shoots both of my cows, throws a grenade at one of my chickens, steals the rusty pocketwatch my grandfather gave Don Pedro at our wedding...
...
...shoots two more chickens,goes out the gate into the cemetery,desecrates two tombstones,shoots the church bell,then goes on to mo down the parishoners in a hail of automatic gunfire,blah blah blah..
......................

 

by TeamLeon
3-11-07
Ashley!! Where have you been...umm... and where are your clothes?
oh Leon it was horrible. Some crazy guy with a chainsaw tried to drag me off and the only way i could escape was to slip out of my clothes...
oh...well, I hope you're okay. We still have to get out of here...
Actually i took a nasty tumble while i was running away. I think I may have injured some ribs...
whatever you do Leon...don't look
Let me take off my bra so you can tell me if anything feels or looks broken...

 

by TeamLeon
3-11-07
Stop right there Salazar!!! Tell me where the girl is or I swear...
Mister Scott Kennedy! So you seem to think you have the upper hand..
huh?!
But you forget who you are dealing with. Behold, the true power of Las Plagas! Prepare your bowels for imminent release..HAHAHAHA!!!
run away, run away.. if you close your eyes it's not really there!!!

 

by TeamLeon
3-11-07
So, what do you think we should be doing about this dude with the fabulous hair whose running around tearing up the place?
Matanos?
Oh snap...your asses got smoked by Mr. Incindiery

 

by TeamLeon
3-11-07
Meanwhile In RE3
Don't worry Claire, I am sending an emergency message out to the CIA regarding our situation here on this island
The CIA? Are you sure they are who we should be contacting regarding this island of unnamable atrocity?
By God you're right. i should contact LEON!!!
Back In RE4
Oh God...another message from this friggin' homo. I'm sorry Claire but if you're hanging with that chooch you're on your own. I hope you don't die too horrible a death...
...GROOOOAAN.. oh, is this a bad time?

 

by TeamLeon
3-16-07
After Successfully Defending The Old Farmhouse Luis Has a Bone To Pick With Leon...
You shot me?! I can not forgive you for this. GOODBYE LEON!
WHOA THERE LUIS!! I wasn't trying to shoot you. I was aiming for the dead guy with the monster craling out of his head!
I would like to believe you but too many times have I seen you zooming in on my head with your sniper rifle.
But it's cool...you would do it to if you had one. But you don't have one because you're a "scientist"...
Aye Dio Mio..I cannot do it. You're hair is simply to wonderful...Truly you are to pretty to be a badass government agent...
You think i am pretty! Ha Ha...Looks like we figured out who the real homo in this story is

 

by TeamLeon
3-17-07
Leon's First Meeting with the Merchant
Hey what's going on...who are you and what are you doing just hanging out in the middle of a cemetery in a town full of murderous freaks?
What're ya buyin?
Dude, that didn't answer my question...who the hell are you? Answer me and maybe I'll buy whatever it is you're hiding in your little outfit there...
What're ya buyin?
OK, screw this...have fun playing with that rifle scope you got jammed in the front of your pants dude...
What're ya wearin?!

 

by TeamLeon
3-18-07
..you don't seem as bad as the other guy who kicked off Sanchez' head,stole all the money from the church collection box,shot out all the windows in the entire town,killed Chief Mendez,stole his eye..
God this bitch doesn't shut up...why did i have to find the one who speaks english...
..burned down half of our shoreline properties,stole Don Miguel's beerstein and the royal insinga...and he illegally parked..You do remind me of him Luis. Except he was so damn pretty.And that hair!
oh god...
I HAVE HEARD ENOUGH ABOUT HOW NICE LEON'S HAIR IS!!!!!

 

One Of Man's Earliest Politically Incorrect Ponderances
If you spin an Oriental around real fast does he get Disoriented?
by TeamLeon, 3-23-07

 

Actual response given at a sci-fi convention...
Live long and prosper...
Fuck off and die!
by TeamLeon, 3-23-07

 

by TeamLeon
3-28-07
Are you serious?!
Oh, well we had to take the legos away from the children because legos promote the evil that is capitalism.
...
I think they should ban lincoln logs because it promotes freeing slaves...
I quit
Oh, well i am suing to have Monopoly taken off the shelves because it gives people wearing monocles and handlebar moustaches a bad name. We never played with legos!

 

by TeamLeon
8-02-08
5 Years Ago
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. I am selling candy for my high school basketball team. I have M&M peanut, Fruit Chews....
It's 11am...why isn't he in school on a Tuesday if it's for his high school basketball team...
2 Years Ago
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. I am selling candy for my senior trip to Rome Italy...today I have M&M peanut, Starburst.....
This is the 14th kid this week going to Rome Italy...is there a site where they get these "speeches". Everyone says the same thing. AND WHY DON'T THEY HAVE REGULAR M&MS!!!
Yesterday
Good Afternoon ladies and gentlemen. Today I am selling candy, not for a B-Ball team or a trip but for myself. to keep myself off the streets and from commiting crimes. Alls I gots is M&M peanut
Wow...The new technique is now veiled threats..."Gimme money or a may end up mugging you in a dark alley, Nice. But you'll never get my money with PEANUT M&M'S!!!!

 

Not tonight honey...I have another headache
No worries. i fucked my secretary in the office today
by TeamLeon, 8-02-08

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