All comics by amelinda

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by amelinda
6-27-05
Why aren't you out swimming?
They kicked me out of the pool.
It's the bathing suit, isn't it?
I told them I got it for my birthday!

 

by amelinda
6-27-05
and this is what we will do to you, Mr 0111 unless you bring us the atmospherium.
I can't watch.
You must watch, Mr 0111.
Oooh! Can I be next?

 

by amelinda
6-27-05
I'm sorry, Brainy, but I can't go on with you any more. You know what they're calling me? A zombie lover. Me. A zombie lover.
I'm a clown, Brainy. You know what that means? I'm ... I'm ... I'm feared by small children and laughed at by adults.
[sob] Ok, Ok, I'll stay. You talked me into it.

 

by amelinda
6-27-05
Alas, poor Gumby - shot in the head, and for what?
Alcohol with red Kool-Aid just doesn't really seem to be a good reason, y'know?

 

by amelinda
6-27-05
I've always wanted to play against Big Blue. So I took my board down to the beach.
Unless it moves in the next 30 sec, I'm gonna win on time.

 

by amelinda
6-27-05
It's another five miles to the gas station. At least it isn't raining.
Why aren't we asking the folks in that castle if we can use their phone?
Castles don't have phones, asshole.

 

by amelinda
6-27-05
Bummer, dude.
Woah. Bad trip.

 

by amelinda
6-27-05
Sometimes I don't think you love me anymore ...
Of course I do. You're my man.
I just get this feeling, like you're seeing someone else behind my back.
What makes you think that?
His makeup rubbed off on you.
It's not makeup, it's a skin condition.

 

by amelinda
6-28-05
[hic] whazzat? i thot you wuz spossed to see a pink ellaphant when youz been drinkin?
That's only for Republicans. You're a Democrat, so you get a pink donkey.
Youz heard what i been THINKIN!?!?
Of course. I'm a figment of your drunken imagination, you know.
Ohhhhhh! Wanna go for a ride, pony?
I hate my job.

 

by amelinda
6-28-05
This week, letters from our readers.
"Dear Clucky, Why did the chicken cross the road?"
To get to the other side!
That's not very funny, you know.
How about ... To get eaten by coyotes!
Is that the best you can come up with?
Well, it's a stupid question ... chickens don't cross roads!

 

by amelinda
6-28-05
Here I am, my sweetest!
You're late.
I ... I ... I was kidnapped by aliens!
Don't think I can't see what you've been up to!
No, no, I wouldn't think that at all ...
Good. I've got my eyes on you.

 

by amelinda
7-03-05
Thanks for the idea, Sparky.
You looking at my girlfriend?
No.
You saying my girl's ugly?
Well, my girl doesn't think so ... and she's the one with her tongue down your girl's throat.
Oh. Does that mean we have to kiss now, too?
How about a beer? That's like kissing for guys.

 

by amelinda
8-16-05
Don't think I didn't see you sucking face with that other zombie ... you slut!
He ... he had such tasty brains ... but I guess it's over between you and me now. Good bye.
Yeah, that's it! Go on, slut, leave! I don't want to see your sad zombie ass around here no more!
You'll haunt my heart forever, my faithless zombie love.

 

by amelinda
8-16-05
We're lost, aren't we.
No, of course not. I've got a map ... in one of these pockets, I swear!
Or maybe one of these pockets ...
Maybe I can follow some tracks ...
Never mind.

 

by amelinda
11-08-05
Fine.
But ... just because it blocks the window view from the lower bunk is a lousy reason to cut it down.

 

by amelinda
11-08-05
For your sins against movieviewers, you are condemned to sing "Stayin' Alive" for all eternity.
But I'm dead... wouldn't that be a lie?
No more than promoting Scientology was.
Ok, you got me.

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