All comics by damianhex666

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
T'was the week before x-mas...
Ho Ho Ho?
Beat it santa
and all thru my head...
Why so "bah humbug" Mark..Don't you want santa to bring you something special for x-mas?
well...sure.....but......
wishing you were cuddled up with me in my bed!
I doubt you could fit Ashley down my chimney anyways..
????? Oh well merry x-mas ashley

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
Typical day at Forum fanatics
Um crys....could ya cool it?
Hi-ya...GIRL POWER!! I am supreme!
three against one
aww geez..hi cassie
Hi Hex..did you know I could SUE you for calling me hon?
But I loves ya all:)
wassup kesse?
I need a practice dummy..bend over hexy!

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
Ok no more Mr nice guy
I am the Evil Damian Hex..BOO...fear me for I am the Devil himself
Hi Hex.. thanks for cheering me up last night..you are SOOO sweet
Must prove I'm the anti christ
Hey Hexy... hows all your cats doing today?
no no Kesse..I am EVIL..EVIL I tell you..
awww forget it!
Crys..I am Mad evil...run while you still got the chance..
You really need to rethink your Image hex!

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
Kesses feeling crazy
Yo yo cassie I'm heading out to hear Morillo spin some mad tunes. Wanna go?
No thank you. I'm going to do some research to see If I can sue hex for using me as a cartoon!
looking for a party
Hey Vicki..I never partied with a swedish girl before...lets get wild and crazy
Sure Kesse..sould I bring the pepsi and popcorn?
But she's not DESPERATE!
Hey there Kesse..wanna party?
Nah..I thought I'd just stay home tonight

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
Howdy mate...seen Kesse or crys around here?
Yeah they are having a "private" chat over there Karl
Ya think Hexy and Cassie are off talking dirty on IM?
Yep...they are having a SORDID affair you know...
Im telling Billy!
how 'bout it hot stuff?

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
My boyfriend says talking to any guy for any reason is CHEATING..He's SOOOO sweet!
That blokes flippin' crazy!
My Boyfriend says that All guys are out to get me!
Thats whack yo..what about us girls? Imma SPANK him..
My boyfriend says all men besides him are evil, demented perverts
You call me Cassie?

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
Karl has a drunken nightmare
Hey Karly boy whats shakin'?
I got so drunk last night that I passed out and dreamed I threw up al over a midget in a clown suit
You best lay off that stuff Karly..I mean a Midget in a clown suit..thats crazy stuff!
Yeah..It was so real..I could almost swear I was really hurling up!
I'm filing a lawsuit first thing tomorrow
anyone fo a game of "spin the bottle?"

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
T'was the night before x-mas
Ho ho ho?
Beat it Santa..
and all thru my head...
Why so "bah humbug mark? Don't you want santa to bring you something extra special for x-mas?
well sure..but...ummm..
I was wishing you were cuddled up all snug in MY bed
I doubt you could sqeeze Ashley down the chimney anyways..
??? Oh well ..Merry X-mas Ashley!

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
A day At Crystals bakery
Hey Crys what ya looking at?
Oh hey Kesse My bakery just hired Hex and I'm keeping an eye on him
Hexy? what the heck can HE do around a bakery?
So much for "Boston Cream" filling...now its time to squeeze some BUNS!
Cancel me Eclair!

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
Well Its official..I'm sueing Kesse for harrassment
Speaking of..here she comes now!
Hey hottie..wanna go out clubbin'?
Kesse I TOLD you once already..I have a boyfriend..doesn't anyone LISTEN?
hubba hubba...look what the cat drug in!

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05
The law says I have the right to sue whoever I want...
and I won fair and square so hand it over....
Not me rap collection Cassie...I'll DIE!

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05

 

by damianhex666
12-08-05

 

by damianhex666
12-09-05
Karl chats up Vicki
.....sad but true.."
..And then AFTER the bean feast we all went out to the pub and I had 14 ales..
...Exit light..enter night.."
Now Usually eating that much and then drinking gives my stomach a twirl but....
Oh my god...what Died in here?
musta been that nasty cat again

 

by damianhex666
12-09-05
Kesse has a dream
Yo cassie..welcome to my dream yo...rainbowland baby lets get funky!
I'm NOT that kind of girl..or AM I?
Yo Crystal...dream cruise baby..you and me! Now get over here and lemme "rock yer boat"
hmmm..what the Hell it's only a dream..
Or Is It a nightmare?
so THIS is your BEDROOM huh?....AWESOME...
I KNEW I shouldn't have eaten Thai food before bed!

 

by damianhex666
12-10-05
Hey Hex...Whats going on?
ahh karl..JUST the person I was looking for
you..uhhh..wouldn't happen to have any....ummm...NAKED pics of Kesse would you?
*gasp* Well of course I don't!
Wanna BUY some?
$$$!

 

by damianhex666
12-10-05
And In further news, A canadian Bakery was shut down by heath inspecters today..
It seems The "Boston Creme" Filling inside several of the dougnuts was NOT exactly boston creme...Pretty gross stuff here folks
I thought they were pretty kick ass yo!
Good thing they didn't try the chocolate frosted

 

by damianhex666
12-10-05
Hex got my entire Bakery closed down Karl..I don't know what to do!
Its a tough one crystal..On one hand its all Hexs fault..on the other he really IS a nice guy deep down
Your right Karl..Hex is a friend..I gotta do the right thing here..
thats me girl!
Any of you guys wanna swap your dessert for a playboy magazine?

 

by damianhex666
12-10-05
I'm a gangsta boy wid a thug attitude...best get outta my way cause I'm about ta get rude...
went on a date with Kesse, crystal and Cass.......all o' dem ho's like to take it in da...
Um..right folks thats all for the Rap show tonight!
eat ur heart out eminem!

 

by damianhex666
12-10-05
Ally has a bad Day
Man Am I in a bad mood today! NOBODY better get in my way!
step aside "Dora the explorer"
I'm going to get slaughtered but I can't resist the challenge
grrr..." no mas........."*take that*...aiiii madre mia........leggo my hair dwarf.........como esta usted...?? grrr
I got winner!

 

by damianhex666
12-12-05
Hey there Santa..I'd like a brand new "sue your ass off" barbie for x-mas this year..
and by the way fatso..my bf says to tell u any old man that sneaks into my house after dark is a pervert and should be hung!
"peace on earth..good will toward men"
*ouch*...ho ho hooooo.....grrrr....*gasp*

 

by damianhex666
12-12-05
allright pervert..on your feet you got company..
your court appointed lawyer wants to see you
wonder if its too late to plead insanity?
My Boyfriend says its ok to represent you as long as we communicate thru sign language...

 

by damianhex666
12-12-05
The local Courthouse caught fire today during opening statements in the "bakery pervert" case
those who escaped spoke of a foul smell moments before the place burst into flames..lets go now to our man on the scene
I knew you could LIGHT em..didn't think they EXPLODED!

 

by damianhex666
12-12-05
yo girl...I heard Cassie is representing Hex in court..dat True?
I'm not really sure Kesse..I tried calling her but only got an answering machine message
mebbe ya dialed wrong..what did the message say?
"at the tone please leave a message..unless you are a GUY..then please hang up as it will upset my true love.."
yeah, dats the right number....
lets go dial it again!

 

by damianhex666
12-12-05
C'mon you stupid phone RING! He PROMISED he'd call tonight....Ring you dumb piece of crap!
Ring you worthless pile of junk..ring damn you!! Ring ring ring!!! oh forget it....useless pile of garbage...!
rotten old basket of bolts...
BITCH!

 

by damianhex666
12-12-05
Look Hex..I know you're mad I had you arrested..but you had my bakery shut down!
yeah well..I'm sure you'll think of SOMETHING to make it up to me..
After all..you got no IDEA the kind of riff raff they have in those places..
wot did I do?
Here we go AGAIN folks!

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
Hurry Up Kesse you gotta hear her New message!
"I'm too busy with my BF to take your call..If you are a FEMALE and want to leave a message press 1...If you r a male please hang up..If you are HEX..I thought you got only one phone call?"
If its my true love..this is for you..."
tha's some whack sheet there crys..Imma have ta Spank that girl!
I'm so ashamed....

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
Hurry up Kesse you gotta hear the new message..
...I'm too busy with my BF to answer the phone..If you want to leave a message and are FEMALE..press 1..If you are a MALE please hang up..If this is HEX..I thought you only got one phone call?"
If this is my true love..this is for you hon.."Every night In my dreams..I see you..I feeeeeel yoooou...
Dats some whack shiet right there..Imma have ta spank tha' girl!
I'm so ashamed

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
I'm GLAD Hex is in jail. What he did was disgusting and unforgivable...
Oh yeah? Well I think it was an Innocent joke and quite funny...FREE HEX!
Well you're a snot nosed little twit!
and you're a goody two shoes little prude!
he's sooooo cute...
Blimey... what a BABE!

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
..If I could manage to break open that cracked part of the wall with my head...
...and I'm planning on protestin' out in front o the court house EVERY day o' the tria..with a big sing "free Hex...
If I could force my arm up thru the air duct and rip off the front facing with my teeth....
...and jesus Still loves even YOU my son....at least as much as he loves charles manson...
Ain't no WAY she's wearing underwear...
whatcha lookin' at me that way for Hex?

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
Tomorrow opening statements will be heard in The Bakery pervert" case.
Lets go outside the courthouse now where our reporter is standing by with pro Hex protestors..
"This is my "free Hex" rap...Hex is not sick...If you put him in jail you can SUCK MY...
BACK TO YOU DAN!

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
With More news On "The Bakery Pervert" case here is Dan rathur
Thanks penelope...I'm told our roving reporter is standing by with the defense attorny..lets go to chip fairway for that report
Am I on TELEVISION?
umm yes ma'me can you give me any thoughts on your upcoming court case?
Hi billy...this is for you hon.."and I...willl love yooooouuu..always....and I....."
I shoulda took that course in dentistry..

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
If I could drop enough weight to stick my leg thru the heat vent...
Bad new hex..Cassies missing yo, Don't worry tho Imma represnt ya myself..
hmmm If I could convince the guard I'm an epileptic and pretend to have a fit I could bonk him on the head and....
I ain't never done this kinda thing so If ya got any advice Let's hear it yo
Wear something low cut sweetie and I'll be out in time ta take ya to hot tub city
Maybe I can FIND Cassie if I look hard enough...

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
why don't you Stop this silly protesting? Hex is going to rot in jail and thats that!
The Hell you say! Hex will go free and live to pull more great gags on all of us!
I SWEAR you are such a CHILD..I couldn't be more grossed out by you If I TRIED..
PRUDE..!...PRISSY PANTS..!.. why don't you go build a CHURCH miss MORALITY?
wanna go have dinner?
LOVE to...!

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
"you've reached Hexs house..Im In JAIL thanks to that false friend Crystal.."
I feel so guilty...
"but fear not..the mighty SATAN will seek her out and place her in eternal HELL for her misdeeds..she will suffer the wrath of 1,000 devils.."
??!!!!
"hahaha...I'm on the highway to Hell....dah da da...dah da da"
MOM!!!!

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
"This is a Special report..."the Bakery pervert" case has been delayed due to most unusual circumstances.."
????
The Defense attorney has suddenly come up missing...the only clue to her whereabouts is this cryptic note found on her door.."
???
"Billy is sick...He comes first..I love yoooooooouuuuu" followed by the Lyrics to "wind beneath my wings"...
for THIS they pre-empted the OC yo?

 

by damianhex666
12-15-05
If I could train a spider to fetch the guards keys...
...and god WANTS you to be certain of his word my son...
..Maybe If I could use my bread ration to build a small explosive..
..so If you have ANY questions regarding the bible PLEASE feel free to ask...
If Adam and eve were both white...how come there are chinese people?
Damn!..He's on to us...

 

by damianhex666
12-16-05
...oh PLEASE...
The owner of the Bakery where the incident took place now insists the defendant blew up her telephone using some sort of occult powers..
Sheer co- incidence..some folks are so superstitious its sickening..
I'll GET him for that...
"exit light..enter night...."

 

by damianhex666
12-16-05
well If It Isn't miss "lets put Hex in Jail" come down to GLOAT did you?
look Karl..I feel bad about it but you know what Hex did to the doughnuts...I ATE one of those!
So what? Kesse had two and she didn't seem to mind one little bit..
and that says WHAT about Kesse to you...?
Wonder if she's BUSY tonight...?
I FEAR for the youth of today..

 

by damianhex666
12-16-05
Look Hex..I don't blame you for being mad..but what else could I do?
I'm Thinking of Dropping charges if you'll PROMISE me that.....are you even going to TALK to me?
I wonder if those babies are REAL...?
????

 

by damianhex666
12-16-05
So we gonna play "hide the pickle" when I get out or what?
..know what HEX.?.FORGET it..everything to you is SEX..SEX..SEX..I'm TIRED of it..I'd HATE to be like you...
Oh..sorry father..Didn't know you were around...
It's ok my child.. it is Indeed sad when a soul is possessed by sins of the flesh..
look at the BUNS on that nun!
Hide the PICKLE??

 

by damianhex666
12-17-05
We'd just like to get serious for a moment and wish you all a happy holiday..
Peace yo..and have a safe and merry x-mas..
May your day be filled with love, laughter and harmony..
and plenty of good food and good times..
...and a wonderful sense of family togetherness...
Cassie, Kesse & Crystal under ONE tree? Gives new meaning to "Ho-Ho-Ho" don't it?

 

by damianhex666
12-22-05
So STUPID Hex did A STUPID thing..is that any reason for STUPID Crystal to toss him In the STUPID jail...? jail?
And then STUPID Cassie leaves him Hanging for Her STUPID Boyfriend? How STUPID is that? If you ask me They should all fall headfirt into a Stupid volcano!!
I don't mean that in a BAD way....
????

 

by damianhex666
12-22-05
So you're Rose huh? You must be REALLY proud to know a guy like Hex..
nah..he's not so bad really. Just a little ODD...
Has He ALWAYS been this way...?
Yep Since the first day I Knew him at least
How did you guys meet anyway?
I was working as mall security...he was putting SLINKYS on the escalators...

 

by damianhex666
12-26-05
so STUPID Kesse is representing STUPID Hex at the STUPID Trial?
Well, I think....
He'll get the STUPID electric Chair...and its all STUPID Cassies fault! I mean Why don't you just drop the STUPID charges and get this STUPID thing over with...?
actually I was....
I mean did your STUPID bakery really lose that much STUPID business from his STUPID joke? I mean how STUPID is this entire thing?
now where did I put that STUPID ball bat....?

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