All comics by evil_punk58

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by evil_punk58
4-22-01
Did you know that guns don't kill people, people kill people?
No, I didn't? I always stupidly thought that guns caused people to die!
Yes, so instead of putting more laws against harmless guns, we need more laws against the real killers, everyday citizens like you and me.
Yeah! That way we can make more great guns to protect us from ourselves.
This ought to do it. Charlton Heston is right, I need to be safe....

 

by evil_punk58
4-22-01
VROOOOM!!!!!!!
here we go again.....
I LIKE THE CARS CAUSE THEY GO FAST AND THEN SOMETIMES THE PEOPLE DIE AND ONE TIME THIS GUY CAME UP TO ME AND SAID.....
blah blah blah, boy it would be really great if i could just.....
THIS ONE TIME I WAS ON FIRE AND MY FACE MELTED SO THEN I SAID TO THE GUY THAT.....
WILL NOTHING WORK?????

 

by evil_punk58
4-23-01
Ugly goes to the dentist....
Hey doc, can you fix my horrible teeth?
Maybe with a sledgehammer....
Hold on, i'll be right back...I just need to check your records.
Alright, I'll just stare at the pointy objects and drool then.
I'm gonna need some more novacain on this one...

 

by evil_punk58
4-23-01
Ugly tries his luck with some females...
I'm going to insult you so that I feel more important.
Is that rum I smell on my breath?
Better luck next time...
Hey, don't leave, I haven't even started sweating yet!

 

by evil_punk58
4-23-01
Ugly tries to reason with God...
Jesus, why'd you make me so damn ugly? I never get laid. I mean for Christ's sake, YOU get laid more than I do.
It is your inner beauty that shines through, my son.
I wonder if you taste like unlevened bread and wine....
Gotta go....!

 

by evil_punk58
4-23-01
MUST MAKE BABIES, MUST MAKE BABIES, MUST MAKE BABIES.....!!!!
plop
Alright! Score one for the home team!!!
Feed me mommy!!!
What??? Responsibiliy??? This changes everything, where're the garbage bags....?
Mommy, I have a boo boo!!!

 

by evil_punk58
4-24-01
Punk-Rawk Boy Needs Sleep
I really need sleep....
Hey, you look like you could use some sleep.
Get away from me you preppy loser. You can't talk to me, i'm punk-rawk.
Fine, I'll just go do my girlfriend then. Ha.
It doesn't help being punk-rawk when you can't even make come backs to preppys.
Sorry baby, I thought I could hold it!!

 

by evil_punk58
4-24-01
Hey man, spare some change for some food?
Why don't you get a job?
I'm Punk-Rawk, I can't have a job, it would cramp my super Punk-Rawk style.
Fair enough, here yah go.
Man, when will people learn not to mess with my style....?
Hey, wait a minute, you looked more Emo than Punk-Rawk...!

 

by evil_punk58
4-27-01
Blatent rip off of the Dead Alewives
Bitch, where's mah bacon?
Beg pardon?
I axed you a question, bitch. Where dah fuck is mah muddafuggin' bacon?
Um, I'd imagine it's on the stove; where you left it?
DAYUM!!

 

by evil_punk58
5-08-01
Ugly goes to Europe...
Do you have cattle here?
Wir essen hier kein Fleisch. Es ist ungesund.
Alright, I'll just go to McDonald's then.
Dummkopf!!
Will you go out with me?
ARG!!!!!!

 

by evil_punk58
5-07-02
Ugly meets Punk-Rawk Boy
So...what's up...
Not much...
Until next time...
I'll bet you that I could eat that squirrel over there before you can count to 53.
Why did I agree to this stupid cross-over shit...?

 

by evil_punk58
3-24-03
Man, look at that chick. I bet she thinks she's more Punk-Rawk than me. Pheh, whatever.
Punk isn't about dying your hair and looking trashy. It's about the scene. It's about the music. GOD I just wanna...
HOLY MOTHER OF CHRIST ON DIET PILLS!
Well that solves that problem. I wonder if this guy does house calls...?
THAT'S RIGHT BITCH! I OWNZORZ JOO!!!1

 

by evil_punk58
4-25-03
Looks like Ugly is in trouble...
Excuse me sir. I represent a group of people who have brought a class-action suit against you for being a hazard to society.
I think this guy is talking to me...but I'm not sure, better pretend not to notice...
Uh, sir? Are you alright? You seem to be staring intently at my tie...
He's right, that tie DOES look good...
Okay...I'm going to slowly back away now. I'll just send you your subpoena in the mail...
Uh oh, he's making a break for it, little does he know that my mind powers will-...wait, I don't have mind powers...fuck...

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