All comics by mandy120

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
Health Reform
Can I help You Sir?
Yes, I came to Atena Insurance to get individual Health Coverage.
For all People
Okay I must ask you a series of questions and the first is "Is your wife/girlfriend or other preganant?
Yes my Fiance' is pregnant but she will not be on this policy.
Ya Right!
Sorry Sir even though she is not on it we have to deny your health insurance try again later.
What! Why is someone being pregnant close to me who is not on the policy causing me to be denied? (pre existing clauses)

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
Birth Control
Are you on the pill?
Yes, I have been since 14
Everyone uses it
(1 month later) What's wrong?
I found out today I was pregnant!
Its 99% effective.
So much for that 1% left!
Hospital here we come!

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
The new
Hey Randy!
Paula we have some bad news for ya?
American Idol
What's that?
Your being replaced!
folks!
By who?
Ellen the fans like a non alcoholic host. Her being gay helps ratings.

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
The new
Hey Randy!
Paula we have some bad news for ya?
American Idol
What's that?
Your being replaced!
folks!
By who?
Ellen the fans like a non alcoholic host. Her being gay helps ratings.

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
Obama's
Hey son what can I do for you?
Mr President when can my brother come home from Iraq?
Big
Son I'll have the troops home by the end of the year.
Thank You Sir!
Ideas
Sorry son he is stilling fighting the war so I can talk Bush into spliting oil profits.
(One Year Later) Mr. President where is my brother at?

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
Disability
How can I help you today?
Doc I'm very moody anymore. I go from being normal to being angry.
Sounds to me your offically bipolar and need to go on meds and file disability.
Okay Doc
Pension
How did your doctor visit go?
Well I went in for PMS mood swings and the doctor said I'm bipolar and should quit working.

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
Obama's
Hey Heather how are you?
Good Mr. President. What are you dressing up as for Halloween?
Halloween
Not sure yet we will see what congress comes up with.
That sounds exciting I guess.
Costume
What are you suppose to be?
A puppet....congress pulls all the strings in my life.

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
Hey sweetie how was your day today?
Bad just got laid off.
Time to file your unemployment sweetie.
Hopefully we will get relief soon.... No one is hiring.
Few short months later.....
No money from unemployment yet. I'm in jail for not paying court order child support to ex-wife.

 

by mandy120
11-12-09
Obama's
Hey little girl!
Mr. President can I shake your hand?
Of course you can... may I ask what we are shaking on?
Of course you can!
Award
..............
Well I had to shake the hand of the man who got a noble prize and done nothing but talk.

 

by mandy120
11-17-09
OUR
Okay what can I do for you today?
I'm here to get food stamps to feed my kids.
WELFARE
Okay how many kids do you have?
I have 7 babies under the age of 8.
SYSTEM!
Where is the father at for these babies?
Not sure there are 20 men and I got 7 kids. Do you what all the names?

 

by mandy120
11-17-09
America's
Woman age 22 goes to doctor to talk about permant birth control.
Doc I want to get my tubes tide so I can't have anymore kids. I can't support the one's I do have.
Faulty
Okay.. there is one problem with that request. Your insurance will only cover the pill.
Well I was on the pill both times and got pregnant with my kids.
System
I'm sorry my hands are tide here.
Great doc I guess I'll see you in another 6 months for more prenantal visits.

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