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| Once upon a time, in Fruitopia, there lived Kiwi. He was a noble fruit, with a kindly heart, but he was terribly unhappy. For he had fallen in love with Strawberry, but such a love was forbidden. | |
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| So one day, Kiwi went to see his father, Pear. "Father," Kiwi said, "What should I do to fill this void in my heart?" "Kiwi," Pear said, "You must go to Strawberry at once and tell her how you feel." | |
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| So Kiwi set off across the valley, to the foot of the mountainside where Strawberry lived. But when she opened the door of the hut, he saw that she was in tears. "Strawberry," he said, "What's wrong?" | |
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| "Oh, Kiwi!" she cried. "It's terrible! I got my x-ray back today and I have cancer!" "Cancer! Are they sure??" Kiwi asked. "I zoomed right over for a second opinion, and they confirmed it!" she said. | |
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| Luckily, just about that time God happened to realize he'd already filled his Strawberry death quota. Long story short - God healed her cancer, they got married and lived happily ever after. | |
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| Until the 8th inning, anyway. That's when all hell broke loose. | |
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