The first person to respond will answer the following question and then ask another one about anything they choose. Hopefully the next person will do the same.

What color underwear are you wearing?

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Purple.

What was your left hand doing before typing your response to this question?

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Blue is the color of victory.

Massaging my foot (it was asleep)

If you were a vegetable, what would you be?

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Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

Eggplant.

Where are we?

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Poop.

Here.

Where are we going?

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Blue is the color of victory.

To the bathroom.

Who's with me?

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Not me.

What does Marsellus Wallace look like?

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Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

He's either fat or not fat.

Who the heck is Marsellus Wallace?

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Blue is the color of victory.

Word around the campfire is that Marsellus threw a guy off a four-story balcony through a greenhouse for touching his wife's feet.

Do you think that might have been a little overreactionary?

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Only if he's gay.

Is he?

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Blue is the color of victory.

I heard that he's regularly tapping Uma Thurman, so only if you think that one time he was raped by a guy named "Zed" makes him gay.

What's the sound of one hand clapping?

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

syphilis.
Oh wait, that's one PENIS "clap"ping.

Why do chicken nuggets taste like avocado turds?

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

Because if they didn't, there wouldn't be anyone to buffer the Senate.

What's my name, bitch?

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

MikeyG, whore.

Where's Zed?

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I am not 16 going on not 17, I know that I'm naive.

Zeds dead, baby, Zeds dead.

Is giving a footrub and giving someone oral sex in the same ballpark?

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

Massaging A bitches feet and sticking your toung in the holiest of holes ain't the same.Its ain't even the same fuckin' game.

What does my wallet say on it?

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"No obscene images." I guess I'll just have to settle for saying cocksucker a lot.

Bad Mutha Fucka.

Do they speak English in What?

What?

Is there a sign on my lawn that says "Dead Nigger Storage"?

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

Jimmie... Jimmie...

So... you just looked at yourself in the mirror... and you want some pot?

I would rather have a pot roast.

Have you seen my baseball?

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

Yes, I fucked it when you weren't looking.

What came first, the chicken or your mom?

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

Danny DeVito.

If you were to take me on a date, where would we go, and would first-date cornholing be a possibility?

Uranus and no.

If you could fuck anyone in the world, why would you want to jack off to Anna Nichole Smith?

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

Because doing it to Steve Urkel gets boring.

If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

I'd be boinky's family tree, no branches.

If an Empire has an Emperor and a Kingdom has a King, what does a Country have?

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Dad was flammable