America continues to speed its merry way towards war with Iran. Comics have always played a huge part of the propaganda in past wars, and this one should be no exception.

So for Comic Contest 333, give us your most subversively patriotic plug for the upcoming war. No rules, just write. Take your cue from the ads of the past. Sell me this war as long and hard and thick as the American public can take it, and make them like it.

Go!

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

Recruitment letter by Humpenstein 9-17-06

Dear citizen, Ever wonder what life would be like if you weren't such a little bitch. Think about it, you might even get some pussy when you're done you little bitch ass hoe. <3 Marine Corps

I can't wait to see not_scyess jump in here and remind us all how much political cartoons suck.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

Presidential Address by niteowl 9-17-06

My fellow Americans... IRAN! 9/11! ISLAMOFASCISM! IRAN! 9/11! ISLAMOFASCISM! IRAN! 9/11! ISLAMOFASCISM! I'd like to thank you in advance for supporting our upcoming war in Iran. Now go back to sleep.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

CC - Hopeless by crackpanther 9-18-06

Sergeant CrackPanther, thank you for calling the U.S. Army's re-enlistment hotline. Wrong. I've been out for three years and still don't have my discharge paperwork. If you are calling for your official discharge paperwork, please refer to your soldier service separation manual, page 37. If your manual's page 37 states This Page Intentionally Left Blank, please see your nearest recruiter. Iran's gonna suck.

Political cartoons suck.

Especially this one:

CC 333: Not Following the Rules by not_Scyess 9-18-06

Mr. President, how will you proceed with Iran? Well, you know, we gotta stick together with our European allies. Are you saying that because you realize America can't actually kill the entire world, or because all your soldier are hopelessly stick in Iraq? Well, those Iraqis, you know. They sure looked guilty of something. What to you say to the notiion that you just like attacking brown people? They look black if you squint enough.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

CC 333: Iran, Iran So Far Away by biped 9-18-06

Fuck Iran. Remember the hostages? Remember the fucking Ayotollah? No, Daddy, I don't. Of course you don't, idiot. You were just a squirt in my dick when all that shit happened. Ha, ha. Nobody remembers anything that you do, Daddy, cuz you're so old, ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. FRY, YOU LITTLE BITCH!!! WE'RE HAVIN' BARBECUED CUNT FOR SUPPER TONIGHT!!! YEEEEEE-HAAAA!!! NO, DADDY, NO--YAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

RCL no. 1270 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 9-19-06

[*CRACK*] "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA..." What are doing, Madame Penguin? I'm whipping the shit out of these Iranian operatives to extract critical government secrets in preparation for our big invasion of Iran! "...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" But, Senator McCain said that this type of torture for information is barbaric and should be banned! Oh, I don't think this qualifies as torture, per se... "Please, to hit me AGAIN, Madame Penguin! [ pant, pant ]" ...because, they seem to LIKE it!

CC 333: Anti-Brad/Iran Comics by biped 9-20-06

Well, Brad--what do you think about the Iran situation? Uh...ah don't know nuttin' 'bout dat. DUHHHHHHH. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! You're so DUMB!!! (sniff) Brad call George Bush and say go war with Iran now. I can't believe it. The President actually takes orders from you. SHUT UP, BAD MAN! ME AM PLAY "DESTROY IRAN" VIDEOGAME NOW!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

"This shit is fucked up."
-Thomas Jefferson

An Important Message from The Righteous Freedom Squad by AngryAmerican 9-20-06

Dear fellow Americans, are you tired of every convient store you go into looking like something out of an Al Queda Social Integration Training Manual? Or having valuable grocery store shelf space being taken up by hummus and baba ganoosh, forcing out your favorite soft cheeses? Or arrr, being afeared of encountering the most daunting beast on the road, the harried-arabic-minivan-driving mother? Or listening to Arabic being spoken on TV? Or anywhere in your vicinity? Or at having to look at swarthy people who are far less attractive than you? OR...GLOB NOT KNOW...GLOB HATE BOMBY PEOPLE?

RFS for WAR by AngryAmerican 9-20-06

Then support W.A.R. The War Against iRan! The Righteous Freedom Squad will be spearheading the effort! Let your voices be heard like the mighty buffalo who, before you nearly wiped them out, used to roam in huge herds across this great nation! Eeyarrr, America can nay afford to have a bloodthirsty country of nearly vegetarian crazies blastin off nookler bombs us every ten minutes... Think of the malls for Odin's sake. Think of the malls! Yes WAR! Let my merciless eye beams be a shining path of death through the ranks of short, hairy people for the salvation of God's chosen country of residency, America! GLOB KILL ALL WHO GLOB TOLD TO KILL!

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Kill Whitey.

The Apple never falls far from the tree by The_young_scot 9-20-06

Everyones heard of the iPod, the iPod nano and even the video iPod. But now we are proud to present the newest product in the range. the iRan! The iRan comes with over 636,372 square miles of storage and upgradable nuclear capabilities To pre-order one, fill out a form at your local army recruitment centre

Inspired by angryamerican saying "iRan"

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

you owe me a quarter.

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Kill Whitey.

World Domination by HotRodDeathToll 9-21-06

The heathen Iranians think that we are trying to take over the world. Therefore they must be trying to stop us from taking over the world - Of coarse you know, this means war!

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The dictator of love and his weapon of mass destruction

Geneva Code by LuckyGuess 9-22-06

Mr. Cheney, I have a letter from some little Iraqi girl talking about how her whole family was massacred. Did you know I have a foot long penis? Did you? I'm so damn proud of my foot long twelve inch penis. She has a chunk of shrapnel in her head that can't be removed or she'll die. It's four inches thick, too. FOUR FUCKING INCHES. How thick is your penis? Not four inches, I'll bet. She's six. Six? Ship her to Guantanamo. I'll show her some torture. VEINY DICK TORTURE.

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

CC333: Thus Spoke Dubya by fpd 9-25-06

My fellow Americans, remember 9/11? The yellow journalism of the liberal press would have you believe that Arabs were behind it. That's crazy liberals for you. The Arabs are our friends, and they praise us from sea to shining sea for liberating Iraq. The real masterminds behind 9/11 were the Iranians, who are Persians, not Arabs. Let's make America safe from Persian dominion! And let's free those hostages too!

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FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

CC-poor litical by xxausrottenxx 9-25-06

hey, you're the president. that bush guy why yes brother I am why did you give so little support to the Katrina effort? you know what's funny if you look at louisiana at the right angle, it looks like a little boot. it's fantastic!

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xx( o Y o. )xx

Groovy! Presents: Captain Obvious and Captain Obvious, Jr. by edoggydog 9-25-06

Hey, dad! I hear Iran wants to make their own nukes. So, I'm thinking of enlisting into the Marines in case we decide to invade... Don't be silly, son! There's no way those ragheads could ever create a nuclear weapon. And, even if they could, they certainly wouldn't use it to bomb us! ======== Ka-BOOOOOOM!! ======== Whoopsie!

Irak And I Ran by HotRodDeathToll 9-26-06

Iran Okay, just tell me - Where did you run?

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The dictator of love and his weapon of mass destruction

quote:

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"This shit is fucked up."
-Thomas Jefferson

An Important Message from The Righteous Freedom Squad by AngryAmerican 9-20-06

Dear fellow Americans, are you tired of every convient store you go into looking like something out of an Al Queda Social Integration Training Manual? Or having valuable grocery store shelf space being taken up by hummus and baba ganoosh, forcing out your favorite soft cheeses? Or arrr, being afeared of encountering the most daunting beast on the road, the harried-arabic-minivan-driving mother? Or listening to Arabic being spoken on TV? Or anywhere in your vicinity? Or at having to look at swarthy people who are far less attractive than you? OR...GLOB NOT KNOW...GLOB HATE BOMBY PEOPLE?

RFS for WAR by AngryAmerican 9-20-06

Then support W.A.R. The War Against iRan! The Righteous Freedom Squad will be spearheading the effort! Let your voices be heard like the mighty buffalo who, before you nearly wiped them out, used to roam in huge herds across this great nation! Eeyarrr, America can nay afford to have a bloodthirsty country of nearly vegetarian crazies blastin off nookler bombs us every ten minutes... Think of the malls for Odin's sake. Think of the malls! Yes WAR! Let my merciless eye beams be a shining path of death through the ranks of short, hairy people for the salvation of God's chosen country of residency, America! GLOB KILL ALL WHO GLOB TOLD TO KILL!

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ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

CC 333: Iran-tastic! by biped 9-30-06

"I can't wait to go to war in Iran." HA HA HA HA!!! Little Timmy's supporting the war effort! SNORT!!! And now, here's a word about "butthole creme." This war in Iran is super-cool--but my BUTTHOLE is KILLING ME! OWWWWW!!! You should use some soothing BUTTHOLE CREME, Bob! "A little dab'll do ya!" "I can't wait to use butthole creme." Aw, little Timmy's butthole hurts, too! HA HA HA HA!!! And now, here's Chip with today's body count and lottery numbers. Chip?

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Last chance to get them in tonight! Judging tomorrow around 8 am Central.

Very nice comics so far.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

This is hard. Many good comix. Must stick to the rules: advertisement for war with Iran.

Recruitment letter by Humpenstein 9-17-06

Dear citizen, Ever wonder what life would be like if you weren't such a little bitch. Think about it, you might even get some pussy when you're done you little bitch ass hoe. <3 Marine Corps

I could just let this one win, since Humpenstein just got hit by a truck and a comic about Marine bulk mail is damn funny. But it's not really about Iran so much...

So it's between AngryAmerican and The_young_scot, both of whom did a two-part extravangza. However, for my money, The_young_scot's wrapup takes it home:

Congratulations to The_young_scot!!!!

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker