....and they said give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money give us money and I drove down to the station and killed them

yeah why dont you compute me a sandwich

They always say they count on "listeners like you" for donations. I don't know how they count on people like me who never donate.

I only donate so I can get the free tote bag.

I didn't donate enough and Jeanine Gerafalo ass-raped me. :(

i didnt donate enough and brad has his way with me

i donated...

my semen. listening to terry gross.

Terry Gross looks like Sinead O'Connor but Diane Rheam/Reem/Remeh? is actually hot. Go figure.

My wife listens to NPR. I'd rather rape my own eardrum with a rusty screwdriver.

I stopped listening to pledge drives when the people on PBS called me a "freeloader." That made me mad. I didn't ask them to broadcast their stupid channel into my house.

I hear enough commercials listening to NPR. With all those sponsors, why should I send $200 for a sweatshirt?

Our NPR station is "trying something new" by cutting the drive in half (for all I know every station is doing this). Only, they've been telling us for the last 10 days that this year's pledge drive will only be 5 days long. A lot. Over and over.