CC 93: Dem Damn Rules by DH-01 1-16-02

To explain the rules of this contest, here's your hosts: Fuk and Suk, the Sick-Ass Bunnies! ... er... ... okay, that didn't work... CUT! It's time for... um... sodomy? Why is it always sodomy with you?! Can't we just cuddle sometimes?! Huh?! HUH?!

CC 93: Dem Damn Rules Redux! by DH-01 1-16-02

Alright, guys, one more shot. Places.... ACTION! ... Yes, Fuk? ... can't fight it... C'mon, spit it out! God DAMMIT. CUTCUTCUT! SODOMY! ... I give up.

CC 93: Dem Damn Rules EX+a! by DH-01 1-16-02

Alright, I'll just have to do this myself, with the aid of my lovely assistant, NeoVid. Nnnnn. Well, the rules be simple, yo. You get to make a strip with a Burma Shave-like style to it... a jingle comic, if you will. DH, this idea is totally ****ed, and you know it. Vidders, do I have to show you my ****ring again? ... I'll be good.

Welcome to THUNDERDOME!

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to create something funny using the infamous Burma Shave-style rhyming thingie. The following is a perfect example of what I'm lookin' for, but it's not an unbending rule...

Burma Shave #2: Ode To Man**** by DH-01 1-05-02

I do not wish to sound too crass... But I would like my shaft to pass... Your puckered manring (please, no gas)... Then thump into your hairy ass. Burma Shave. moh!

Here are the actual honest-to-Tobor rules.

1) Minimum length for the jingle HAS to be two panels, but there's no max length. If you wanna make a 20-strip epic, go wild.

2) The damn thing has to rhyme to some extent, not neccesarilly a full-strip rhyme (y'know, pass/gas/ass/crass, as shown above). If **** can rhyme, so can you.

3) I either will or will not give extra consideration to any entries making light of sodomy. I haven't decided yet. ^_^

4) The comc does NOT have to end with the Generic Moh Omlo ending. That's up to you... BUT, there does have to be 'Burma Shave' there.

5) If you use 'suckit' ANYWHERE in your entry, I will come to your house and show you my ****ring.

6) Finally, all sales are final.

7) FINALLY finally... I'm actually gonna judge on general humor, not just the Stripcreator Standard. So it's time to stop relying on telescoping robot phalli and rely on your /\/\@|) $|<177z!!! (although, if clever enough, things telescoping penii-related may catch my eye...)

I'm givin' y'all until Midnight EST Wednesday. One week.

Good luck, and good comicking!

-DH1

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Needs more sodomy.

quote:

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5) If you use 'suckit' ANYWHERE in your entry, I will come to your house and show you my ****ring.

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sinceyouaskedsonice

mygirlfriendisinfurs by xpac 1-16-02

imwenis,imnotaching imwenis,iwanttoseea****ring imxpac,andigottwotearsinabucket imxpac,suckit burmashave moh

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we're sending our love down the WE-ELL-ELL-ELL! WELL IT'S THE BIG SHOW!

CC 93: Yknow, like the old ads by NeoVid 1-16-02

A man too broke to have any fun... Decided to burn off his beard with the sun... He ended civilization with his solar light gun... Then ended the strip with a pun... Bum a shave? D'oh.

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

What's your address, xpac?

-DH1

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Needs more sodomy.

LJ & The Skinny : The Great Sell Out by rev667 1-16-02

They running a Burma Shave comp on stripcreator.com Burma Shave? damn straight, i got some **** goin on.. but to win the prize your rhyme has gotta be fly.. what with ****rings an sodomy and my ***** life double wide? damn straight ya homo, just shout out Moh Omlo and i'll bust my ass cheeks while TOBOR ********s me!! ::BURMASHAVE:: [[itz da bomb]]

western capitalist ***** mongering advert shot!!
i just feel so dirty selling out my strip like this.......

Ehhh.

CC 93: Clean, Shaven by deucepm 1-16-02

There were a couple of sick-ass bunnies... Who wanted to shave clean their cunnies. They used this cream upon each ****... ...then went to find a man****** 'bot! Burma Shave. Huh?

Make the football go away, please.

CC 93: Futurama Mama Jama by deucepm 1-16-02

There was a guy who went to the future... ...and wanted to shave without getting a suture. He found something smooth so he wouldn't get cut... Too bad the stuff comes from a giant slug's butt. Slurm-a-shave!

I foresee something truly atrocious being posted here by kaufman before long...

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

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Batman created by Bob Kane

quote:

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I foresee something truly atrocious being posted here by kaufman before long...

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CC93: Burma Shave Saves by fpd 1-16-02

Ever feel like you were drawn by Basil Wolverton? Does your ugly mug take away from all your fun? Would you like to spend time with cute girls like us? Would you like girls to do something other than scream and cuss? You could sell you soul for what you crave. But praise the Lord there's Burma Shave.

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FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

CC 93: Tora Bora Whora by kaufman 1-16-02

What would have become of our pal Osama were he equipped to be a mama? BURQA SLAVE!

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

It is DH's Fault - by default by Spankling 1-16-02

When you're feeling blue and funky... Don't just sit and spank your monkey! Give the default girls a holla! Sucky sucky! Just Fi' dolla! Berma Shave! That's right. We're smooth all under!

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

CC 93: The sex fiends by dcomposed 1-16-02

im feeling horny, its time for sex **** bend over and you will be ********d by tobor We've had sex so much that it seems like a chore just shutup ***** and get on the floor Burma Shave ho!

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Batman created by Bob Kane

CC93: Community service... by DexX 1-17-02

If you can't find a man to satisfy you... You want a guy who won't deny you... Don't want a man who's thin and weedy... The bigger the better, I'm feeling greedy! Burly Slave! *raowr!* You rang, mistress?

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Cowboy Poe-etics by Namgubed 1-17-02

... Leave no black plume as a token - - of that lie thy soul hath spoken! Leave my loneliness unbroken! - quit the bust above my door! Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door! Quoth the raven, Burma Shave. What the hell are you talking about?

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"There's no point in beating a dead horse ... except, of course, for the pure joy of it." - A. Whitney Brown

Isn't He Glamorous? by Namgubed 1-17-02

Dr. Banner was a hero ... Saved that kid right at ground zero! Rads a-plenty upped his bulk, What radiation formed this Hulk? Gamma wave. Cthulhu - er - Hulk will smash!

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"There's no point in beating a dead horse ... except, of course, for the pure joy of it." - A. Whitney Brown

CC 93: Minimalist, But Still An Awful Pun by deucepm 1-17-02

A fellow by the name of Fats Looked mighty rough in beard and tats. To join the ranks of dapper cats, He used our cream--and hungry rats! Vermin-shave! My kingdom for a graphic designer.

CC 93: Desperate Measures by deucepm 1-17-02

A lady by the name of Min was sure her looks would lead to sin. Hmmm...how shall I tame my sinful flesh? She used our special creamy tin and cut off every bit of skin! Woooo! Much better! I'm a sunbeam for Jesus! It really did raise quite a din. Perma-Shave! Yang to your yin! I'm ****ing freezing.

CC 93: Painfully Obvious by deucepm 1-17-02

A three day jag of speed and coke... ....made Sammy look like a jamoke. He thought he'd shave--after a toke... ...with what came out when he'd had a poke. That's what he did when next he woke. Sperma-shave! What a crap joke.

CC 93: Topical But Awful by deucepm 1-17-02

Are shaven cheekbones what you lacks? Our foam will put you on your backs! No need to sharpen up that axe! Men, you can use it on your sacks! This stuff will make you rest in pax. Germa-shave! It's made with 'thrax!

I'll stop now.

CC 93: Paradisio by kaufman 1-17-02

Who does fate now toward me send? My goodness, Gabe, my old net.friend! Hey Boo, do you know by any chance, that you're not wearing any pants? If my lower protection were suddenly cut off, I know I'd be freezing my Billings butt off! My secret is long, shaggy hair, that I've grown on my derrierre. My furry bushy anal mat protects me like a Russian hat. A Russian hat? That's warm, I say. I'll walk out nude, and feel like May.

CC 93: Inferno by kaufman 1-17-02

TOBOR CAN'T CORNHOLE HIS FAVORITE BITCH. ALL THAT BUTT HAIR MAKES TOBOR ITCH! WHAT I WOULD GIVE TO PENETRATE THOSE BUNS! THIS PRODUCT MAKES YOUR SKIN AS SMOOTH AS KAUFMAN'S PUNS!!! NO REASON TO BE SAD AND WHINY, TOBOR GET DEPILIATORY ON GABE'S HINEY!

CC 93: Purgatorio by kaufman 1-17-02

Preview, Spell-check and/or Save? I'll enter it, I hope they'll rave. Hey DH, how'd you find my divine comedy? Not too bad, but it could use more sodomy! BURMA SHAVE! moh.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

I used an actual Burma Shave slogan that I found here to make this entry. Tragically, It didn't help make this strip funny.

CC93: Yes, this entry is bad. by Jabizo 1-17-02

Ben met Anna, Made a hit Ya wanna go out. I've got tickets to the Jerry Seinfeld performance tonight. Hmm.. OK, but don't touch me. Neglected beard That Jerry was great, huh? Let's makeout in my car now. You smell and your whiskers have bits of kitty litter stuck in them. Loved Jerry, but you disgust me! Ben - Anna Split Burma Shave? It'll take a lot more than that to redeem you, Bub.

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Vulgarity is simply the conduct of others. -Oscar Wilde

CC 93: Add ad by NeoVid 1-17-02

There was a little boy who snapped... Of that day they still tell stories... The disaster was caused by his name... Never call your son "Mike Litoris." Burma Shave.

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

I'm a newbie, but I thought I'd give it a go. Don't hate me.

Hey Moh, Hey Moh... by TheBlairZip 1-17-02

Oh, what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive! I was not looking for this complication. And pardon my brutal observation... But you should have told me about your condition, which has left me crying, desperate, and wishin'... ...that, though it's gonorrhea we now share, Alas! I should never have rammed my rod up your ass! Sorry, it's my first time. BURMA SHAVE! Feel the difference, *****. Moh. I never loved you.

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If it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have no luck at all. D'OH!