All comics by Emmi

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by Emmi
5-12-01
You think I'm sexy, You wan't to kiss me.
Uhm...not really.
Sure ya do...everyone wants to kiss me! I am the SEXY GODDESS OF LOVE !
No...I am gay.
...But if you were straight, you would totaly do me right?
Probably not. Now, I need to go find a man. So, if you will excuse me...

 

by Emmi
5-12-01
So...no hard feelings about the whole "gay" thing, right?
Why would their be? I am the gay one, you are the one who was rejected.
Asshole.
Dollar hoe.
God, I wish he would fuck me.
God, I wish her brother would fuck me.

 

by Emmi
5-12-01
So, are we friends?
Whatever.
Good enough.
If you say so.
What he doesn't know is that I am going to slip Extasy into his drink so he will sleep with me.
What she doesn't know is that I am not stupid enough to drink anything she gives me.

 

by Emmi
5-12-01
So, where do you wanna go tonight?
Not out with you.
I see how it is.
Too bad it took you so long.
You are NOT a good friend.
I never said I was your friend. You ASUMED.

 

by Emmi
5-12-01
Raider attempts to get Atti "in his pants"
I want YOU in my pants.
Uhm...
What?
You're cute.
...Does that mean she wants to sleep with me?
Maybe I should sleep with him...out of pity...

 

by Emmi
5-12-01
DJ...Emmi wants to eat your pie.
I don't have any pie.
...
Do I?
DJ, think about it. Emmi want's to "eat" your "pie"
Oh! Hehehe...

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
So...Seth...
What is it now, Jules?
God...he is so HOT! I just wanna screw him!
Oh great...she is staring at me like she wants to screw me agan...
I wonder what he is thinking...
Why do the desperate ones always come after me?

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
I just don't understand why Seth doesn't want me. I mean, I am pretty, cute, pretty, AND pretty!
...Maybe he is gay. I think he might have said something about it...
...What a moron.

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
.....
.....
So....
So....
.....
Slept with any interesting people lately?

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
This being friends with a gay guy is a pretty sweet deal.
He has it all! Look's personality, and a great butt!
...Too bad he's gay.

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
So, Seth. Where did you go last night?
Out with Ted.
Ah...Is he your boyfriend?
Nope. I didn't even know his name until the end of the night.
Oh. Is he hot?
Not relly. I only went out with him because I wanted to get away from you.

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
Well...It's Saturday night and I have nothing to do...
......
Isn't he gonna ask me out?
Not if my life depended on it.

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
Sticker wrote a poem for his mother!
Ahem...For my mom on mothers day...
Aww...you didn't have to...
How sweet....
Uhm...Happy mothers day!...The End!
.......
I don't think she likes it.
Eh...I didn't understand the assignment.
...I gave birth to a moron!

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
I wonder what he looks like naked...
She is thinking about me naked again...
Oh yeah.....
Oh God, she is salivating
Very, VERY naked....
QUICK! Somebody call the paramedics!

 

by Emmi
5-13-01
Oh woah is me! Oh sorrow! Oh despair! I have killed my dearest friend! And shoved his frail body into a trash can!
Dude...I'm not dead.
How could I commit such a foul deed?
I said I'm not dead, Dude! I think if you pull me out now and get me to a doctor, I will have a 99.2% chance of survival!
Oh Pain! Oh Strife! I will be haunted to the very depths of my soul!
Fine, Dude, I got myself out of the can. Thanks for your help. *coughmoroncough*

 

by Emmi
5-14-01
Woah...this chick is smokin' something major.
Hayuck! I have one tooth!
........
I be sellin' it to you fow crack money...
........if I walk away slowly, maybe she won't attack.
Where you goin' hoe? I need my crack money!

 

by Emmi
5-14-01
Why do you fight the feelings in your heart, Seth?
.....
I know that deep down inside, you love me.
.....
Don' you?...Seth?
.....

 

by Emmi
5-14-01
God, I am gorgeous.
God, I am gorgeous.
Mirrors are fun. I can look at myself all day long if I want.
Mirrors are fun. I can look at myself all day long if I want.
Hmm...why does everything I think come up in a bubble above my head? That's just not natural....
Hmm...why does everything I think come up in a bubble above my head? That's just not natural....

 

by Emmi
5-16-01
Seth, if I was a guy would you sleep with me?
No.
Why not?
Becase am disgusted by your very being.
*sniff* Thanks.
Does this mean she is going to leave me alone now?

 

by Emmi
11-19-01
So, Seth. We are back from Summer break. I though maybe you changed your mind about me while we were apart?
...No. I am still very, VERY gay.
Oh...are you SURE? Because, I am sensing a bit of sexual tension between us.
No, I don't feel it. I just had sex with a man. Maybe you are just sensing the afterglow.
...Is he single?
...

 

by Emmi
11-19-01
Emmi and GJ dwell on the comeplete lack of comedy in their lives...
Dude, my life is SO unfunny.
Don't worry. My life is unfunny too.
Yah...we both suck...
Some of us literally...
Hey! That was only one time! And I SWEAR I thought he was a girl.
......

 

by Emmi
11-20-01
Matt expresses his feelings about "Boom Baby!"
Oh my GAWD, Emmi! I love your comics!
Oh really? Thanks. -
Yes, I like the way the charaters interact with each other.
Well, I try.
...I think Seth is really hot...
Dude, you are such a lesbien.

 

by Emmi
11-20-01
Seth, let's go see a movie.
....
Well?
....HAHAHAHA!!!
What's so funny?
Well, I just realized that no matter what I do you will NEVER go away, and the thought is so pathetic, it is funny to me.

 

by Emmi
11-21-01
Hey Seth! I found the perfect girl for you!
I see..
She has reddish hair, blue eyes, and a REALLY cute body...
Uh-huh...does she have a penis?
Uhm..no?
Not interested.

 

by Emmi
11-22-01
Bitch.....
I'm an old hag!
Why are you such a prostitute?
Because I'm so hag-ish!
So, whats for dinner mom?
We are having steak. As soon as I can find someone who will pay the whole $30 for this.

 

by Emmi
12-02-01
C'mon Seth. Let's go out...just once? PLEASE?
No.
SETH! I have been nothing but PATIENT with you! can't you reward me with just one date?
...Fine. Be ready at 8.
Oh I am SO getting some tonight...
You do know, you aren't getting any tonight, right?

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