All comics by Fred_the_Impaler

 

Safe Sex by Fred_the_Impaler 11-21-01
Jane notices Pete's strange behaviour... Why are you touching yourself? You make me hot, baby!	Jane is secretely flattered...and finds herself turned on as well. That's disgusting...but strangely exciting... That, fat, jiggling ass...oh,oh!	Jane reaches a decision... Ok!! Let's go to my place! Why? I just finished.

 

:kiwigirl: by Fred_the_Impaler 11-21-01
What's wrong, man? It's almost time for work...	What's so bad about that? Well, starting today I got a gig at fuckedcompany.com	.....................? as the goatse bunny...

 

Ninja Negotiations by Fred_the_Impaler 11-21-01
Takako faces racism again... Ha! Fight me, ninja bitch! How dare you stereotype me based on my ethnicity!	The assault continues... You have insulted a Shaolin temple! Help! I'm being hate crimed!!!	Takako deals with the situation with grace and dignity. I'm sorry...I was just joking... Cut off your little finger as a token of your shame and we'll call it even.

 

Calling you by Fred_the_Impaler 11-21-01
An unexpected call... Ring Ring Who could that be?	Unlimited possibilities: A telemarketer?...The police? (Have I been found out?)...My psycho gilfriend?...The nun from last night? Ring Ring Should I answer it?	Ring Ring Fuckit...I'm going next door to kill the neighbours.

 

Oops...she did it again by Fred_the_Impaler 11-21-01
Britney Spears tells her favorite groupie the bad news... Russ...I've something to tell you... Wassup, Britney?	She drops the bombshell... I'm pregnant with the your and Bill Cosby's baby WTF?..You said you was 'protected'	I meant legally...here's your summons to the paternity and child support hearing. Wait a minute...I can't be the father... I only did her anally...and I splooged on her face!

 

Taking the Piss by Fred_the_Impaler 11-22-01
A strange experiment takes place. Hey, man...I just took that capsule and then pissed in this glass like you asked me to... Good. Now drink it.	Fuck that!! You never said anything about that! I want to be paid more for that. Ok...another fifty bucks. Now...drink it!	A transformation takes place momentarily... I feel different somehow... *sigh* Back to the drawing board...Once again my urinary health drink suppliment has produced unexpected results.

 

Pancake bunny behind the scenes by Fred_the_Impaler 11-23-01
:kiwigirl: at home. So...how was your first day as the goatse bunny? My...ass...is...so...gaddamn...sore!!	Why don't you sit down? I can't - I'm stuck in this position...Those fuckers at fuckedcompany.com are real sickos! They had me going all day!	Jeez, man...why don't you quit? Well, the money's good...and the attention turns me on, you know? Although the pancake chafes my head sometimes.

 

Sweet Valley High...medicine for the soul. by Fred_the_Impaler 2-21-02
The horrible truth is discovered! We are but pale copies My God! Can this be true?	We are not an official "Life in Hell" strip. It's all been a lie. No! It can't be true! Is this all meaningless?	Turn on the TV. It's time for Sweet Valley High... Ah yes...the sweet mind numbing poison may help me forget...at least I have SOMETHING to live for.

 

Da Fuzz by Fred_the_Impaler 2-21-02
Hippy in trouble? Shit. That cops looking right at me.	Christ. I've got a joint in my pocket! Don't move! Uh...officer is there a problem?	Keep still! I've almost completed sketching you...I'm capturing your beauty on paper. Would you like to come back to my place to "model"? Your a fag, right?

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