All comics by Goshi

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by Goshi
9-28-03
MR PIMP HAS A GOOD LIFE
I AM A PIMP YAY!!!!
AND I AM THE PIMPS HO!11111
UNTIL HE MET THIS GUY
GIMMIE YOUR MONEY BITCH!!
stfu
AND NOW THE PIMP IS DEAD!!!1
damnit
HAHA

 

by Goshi
9-28-03
LAST TIME WE LEFT OUR HERO HE WAS KILLED BY THAT GUY
YO WHERE AM I?
U ARE IN HELL CAUSE U SUCK
THE PIMP WENT TO HELL CAUSE HE WAS A PIMP AND NOW HE IS BEING TORTURED
HAHAHA NOW U MUST HAVE ANAL SECHS WITH ME!!1
OH SHIT
IT SUCKS TO BE THE PIMP
OMG TEH ANAL SECHS FEELS GOOD
SMOKING IS BAD FOR YOU

 

by Goshi
9-28-03
HEAVEN:
So I told her, "I can make a miracle occur in your pants baby!"
HAHAHAHAHA!!!1
OMG OWNED NOOB
Jesus can I borrow 10 bucks?
Ask dad, I mean you are supposed to be his voice on earth or something
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO PUT HERE
I am sexy
Goatse.cx

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
FFJ#FEDKJGIO$WE
Ú­×½ª«z\DwsT45G?
@FDG!!!þûøåéÃص¹!!!
£££££¥¥¥$$
6062435....
gfRHGg?
TEH PRETZEL!!!!
$$$$$
¶¶@½ªa`Ą

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
OUR HERO THE SUPER GOVERNMENT AGENT MEETS THE EVIL TERRORIST WHO HAS BEEN BLOWING SHIT UP RECENTLY AND KILLED THE AGENT'S BEST FRIEND
I am a government agent who loves Freedom and Democracy® and I will kill you cause you are a bad person who is against America
HAHAHA I AM AN EVIL TERRORIST WHO WILL DESTROY THE WORLD CAUSE IT SUCKS
HAHA THE HERO WILL NEVER CATCH UP TO ME SO I WILL MAKE FANCY EXPLOSIONS AND KILL!!
I AM A FANCY EXPLOSION MADE THANKS TO THE MOVIES BIG BUDGET
OUR HERO FINALLY CAUGHT UP TO THE TERRORIST AND KILLED HIM BUT WE DON'T HAVE ROOM TO SHOW THAT.. Later That Day:
I hit on you throughout the movie and you called me a sexist bastard but now that I saved the world wanna go have sex?
I can't resist your charms any longer............... MAKE LOVE TO ME NOW!

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
I ROBOT I WANT FRIEND! <3
No! ROBOTS ARE STUPID! HAHAHA YOU STUPID ROBOT!
Me Sad... All me want is love..
Awww... I'm sorry, I didn't know robots had feelings.. I'LL BE YOUR FRIEND MR ROBOT!!
Don't mess with robots kiddies
IT IS TOO LATE FOR THAT NOW PUNY HUMAN YOU DIE!

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
Mr. Robot wants friend
Me want friend
Me want friend
Will you be friend?
Me want friend
Then Little Mr. Robot blows up and it makes Mr. Robot Sad =(
Me want friend

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
Mr. Robot meets young vietnamese prostitute named Ling-Ling
Will you be friend?
Me love you long time! 5 dollar!
Mr. Robot brings Ling-Ling back to his house to be his "friend", not knowing the cops arrived
FREEZE YOU SICK FUCK!
Will you be my friend?
Sure.. wanna play house friend? I'll be the daddy and you the mommy.....

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
Mr. Robot escaped from jail
Will you be my friend?
You again?
Me want *die*
DON'T MESS WITH THE KANGAROO BITCH!
Me want friend

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
Last time we left our hero he died
Will you be my friend?
No. Robots suck.
YOU ARE A BAD MAN. KILL HUMAN.
...oww
And thus our hero has a happy ending
Will you be my friend?
Sure!

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
Somewhere in the depths of Joseph Stalin's Mind:
I am the cheese
You slept with my wife now you die
WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THIS WORLD?
You have picked the wrong path man.. now it is time for your death at the hands of EFIJToiu
THERE IS REALLY A DEEP AND INTELLIGENT PLOT THESE ARE NOT JUST RANDOM SCENES THROWN TOGETHER
This never happened

 

by Goshi
9-29-03
HELL, NY:
FO SHO I AM SICK OF TEH ANAL SECHS I WANNA GET OUT OF HELL
THE PIMPS PRAYERS ARE ANSWERED BY JESUS
I WILL SAVE YOU!
THANK YOU JESUS I NEVER THOUGHT YOU WOULD SAVE A HUSTLER LIKE ME!
HEAVEN:
Welcome! I am Flip and welcome to the crusade against feminists, athiests, vegetarians, D&D nerds, communists, hippies, and homosexuals! But first lets relax by watching the 700 Club and Fox News!
I MESS TEH ANAL SECHS!

 

by Goshi
9-30-03
Osama! You are trying to blow up the white house aren't you? I will kill you in the name of Freedom and Democracy®!
Noo... George, I need to apologize...
...I realize now that you and I are not so different after all. We are both religious fanatics that are willing to sacrafice an infinite number of our followers in our jihad/crusade for power.
Thank you Osama, I now see the light! This could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship!
And then Aliens blew up the world

 

by Goshi
9-30-03
I am sad. I think I am going to kill myself with this hammer and nail.
As long as you aren't one of those vegetarian communist hippies of hollywood that protest the brilliant orders of our President Bush who under God helps preserve Freedom by blowing up terrorists
Life is not worth living anymore, so I will drive this nail through my skull.
With all your self hated I guess you are a heathen liberal. Thanks to the second amendment I have the right to shoot you. GOD BLESS FACISM AND TRUE WHITE AMERICANS!
Authors Note: The beliefs of Flip do not represent the country as a whole.
He was going to kill himself anyway, so all I did was speed up his death. Onward, we must continue my Crusade for America!

 

by Goshi
9-30-03
FAGS ARE STOOPID ROFFELZ!
STFU

 

by Goshi
9-30-03
FROM HIS HUMBLE BEGINNINGS AS A PEASENT TO HIS DAYS AS DICTATOR
We are all equal! So you should celebrate by building me bridges for the Five Year Plan!
k
COVERING THE EXCITING PARTS OF HIS LIFE LIKE THE BOLSHEVIK REVLUTION AND WW2!
YOU ARE A BAD MAN MR. STALIN!
But I helped stop Hitler!
THE BREATHTAKING FINALE!
JOOOOOSEPH STAAAALIN SUUUPEERRR STAAAR!
Comming to a theater near you never!

 

by Goshi
9-30-03
Note: This Story is based on the actions of a local highschool football team. I will use the real team name cause I can.
WE ARE THE MEPHAM PIRATES FOOTBALL TEAM AND WE ARE AT A CAMP TRAINING BUT WE ARE BORED SO LETS SODOMIZE SOME FRESHMEN WITH GOLFBALLS
NO PLEASE DON'T SODOMIZE ME YOU SENIORS I AM JUST A FRESHMAN WHO WANTS TO PLAY FOOTBALL TO GET LAID
FRESHMEN SUCK SO WE WILL HOLD THEM DOWN AND SHOVE GOLFBALLS UP THEIR ASSES THEN CRAM THEM IN WITH A BROOMSTICK AND THEN RIP THE GOLFBALLS OUT AND LAUGH
OWW! THE GOLFBALLS HURT UP THERE AND WHEN YOU RIP THEM OUT YOU RIP MY ORGANS AND MAKE ME UNABLE TO CONTROL MY BOWLS! IM GONNA TELL!
Remember, Raping Freshmen is BAD!
YOU ARE UNDER ARREST AND THE MEPHAM PIRATES ARE DISQUALIFIED FROM FOOTBALL SO YOU ARE NOW IN LAST PLACE EVEN BEHIND THE KENNEDY COUGARS WHO CANT WIN A GAME
SHIT

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
Nolan is On the Computer: (YES I AM A PIRATE BECAUSE THIS IS MY COMIC SO I CAN BE WHATEVER I WANT!)
*pr0n*
SCHOOL!
...shit.

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
English:
I'm hungry
REMEMBER TODAY IS "WEAR THE SAME THING AS EVERYONE ELSE" DAY CAUSE ITS SPIRIT WEEK SO HAVE SCHOOL SPIRIT. BUT NOW LETS GO OVER BORING ESSAY SHIT CAUSE THIS CLASS SUCKS
Spanish:
omg this is hard plz tell us teh answers for everything!!1
STFU *CONTINUES TO SAY STUFF IN SPANISH THAT I DIDN'T PAY ATTNETION TO*
Social Studies: (Note: I accually did the Scientific Revolution in Social Studies today but I feel like showing the American Civil War cause I can)
DIE
NO YOU DIE

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
9/30/03: The Dreamcast Phantasy Star Online Servers officially closed. This comic is dedicated to PSO for Dreamcast.
I am a RaMar Ranger who is hunting monsters in the forests of Ragol to find out what happened to a space colony! Yeah, the plot sucks.
I am a random monster who will die. Yeah.
Yeah, this is pretty pathetic.
I am doing a quest in the ruins where I must destroy out of control robots!
I AM AN OUT OF CONTROL ROBOT GO ME!
Thank You Sega! Monthly Fees suck
I AM FLIP, THE TRUE BOSS OF THE GAME! MY GOAL IS TO STOP THE VEGETARIANS, FEMINISTS, COMMUNIST GREEN PARTY HIPPIES AND D&D NERDS BY SPEWING OUT EMPTY RIGHT-WING HYPOCRITICAL RHETORIC
You Fiend!

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
OMG THEY ARE DRINKING TEA BUT I CAN'T SHOW IT CAUSE STRIP CREATOR SUCKS
...sup?
I don't agree with your liberal views on Christianity.
Oh, I'll turn the other cheek on that statement.
And are you a homosexual? You just sit on that cross nearly naked, makes me wonder about your sexual orientation.
Oh look, theres my ride.

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO
I HATE THE BIZARROS!

 

by Goshi
10-01-03
Oh my God, it's Nevin!
Yep.
You fucking rock!
Yep.
Can I have your autograph?
No.

 

by Goshi
10-02-03
HI YOUNG TENDER CHILD!
....
WANT TO STAY AFTER THE SERVICE FOR SOME OVERNIGHT BIBLE READING?
TOO BAD THE KID RAN INTO A ROAD WHEN A CAR WAS COMMING.
*I'M A CAR*

 

by Goshi
10-02-03
Hi I'm Asiangirl1 and in less then a year I'm going to be dead.
Less Than a Year Later:
...
...

 

by Goshi
10-02-03
AND THUS OUR HEROES SET OUT ON AN ADVENTURE TO SAVE THEIR WORLD!
Want 2 cyber?
k. A/S/L?
wats under ure armor? ^_^
ROAR I'M A MONSTER!
ROAR I'M A MONSTER!
stfu im trying 2 get laid here

 

by Goshi
10-02-03
(this strip isn't accually funny and is really just a cheap excuse to use Kaddar2 sprites)
I HAVE COME TO KILL THE KING!
Okay, have fun
OMG IT IS VERY DARK IN HERE I HOPE I AM NOT KILLED BY A NINJA
I HAVE KILLED THE KING!
OMG

 

by Goshi
10-02-03
Jesus could kick Buddha's ass anyday.
In your dreams. Bring it on!
*BUDDHA IN THE FORM OF A SQUIRREL* BUDDHA BLAST!!!!!!!!!!!
JESUS HOLY POWER CROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And thus the world exploded.

 

by Goshi
10-03-03
I'M THE TOKEN BLACK CHICK WHO IS GETTING IN THE WAY OF EVERYONES RELATIONSHIPS.
YEAH WELL I HAVE TO OVERUSE CLICHE SARCASM TO MAKE UP FOR THE LACK OF SCRIPT!
OMG I CAN'T CHOOSE BETWEEN YOU OR ROSS!!!!
I'M A DUMBASS LIKE ALWAYS SO INSTEAD OF THINKING LETS JUST HAVE SEX!
TO BE CONTINUED!!!!
I'M THE ONLY ONE WITH A JOB AND A BRAIN BUT I MAKE UP FOR MY INTELLIGENCE BY BEING A WHINY ASSHOLE... OH SHIT RACHAEL AND JOEY ARE HAVING SEX!

 

by Goshi
10-03-03
OH NO A DEMON!
OMG FOOD!
YOU ATE GRANDPA!
He tasted like shit.
I think I ran out of ideas. (Like I had any in the first place.)
*tentacle rape*

 

by Goshi
10-03-03
OUR HEROES ARE CURRENTLY IN THE DUNGEON OF DOOM!
MWAHAHA I HAVE BETRAYED THE PARTY FOR MONEY AND POWER AND WILL NOW KILL YOU ALL!!!!
eep help me!!!!!!!1
ill save u! *GOES SSJ10 AND KILLS U W/ SUPER BLAZING SWORD ATCK!!!!11111111*
This is bullshit.
OUR HEROES THEN ESCAPED THE DUNGEON OF DOOM!
thank u for saving me. omg im so hott now lets go have cyber sex!!!
sweet

 

by Goshi
10-07-03
Our hero Rush and his sidekick Flip are killing Iraqis who don't accept American rule in Iraq when Rush decides to take care of some business....
You go kill people in that orphanage that don't accept Jesus, I'll meet you in the Fox News camp. I got some business to take care of in downtown Baghdad....
Yes sir!
Downtown Baghdad:
Hi I'm a corrupt bastard using the chaos in Iraq as an excuse to make some cash selling drugs.
I need to fill up my "perscription" with some shit that makes me high as a kite. Yeah, I have a serious disease.
To be continued...
YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE MUTHERFUCKERS!!!!!
Thank you, now I gotta go burn down some mosques now.

 

by Goshi
10-07-03
Somewhere in Baghdad:
Well that sure was a good Mosque burning. Now to try these pills....
DON'T LISTEN TO THE ANTI SMOKEING PROPEGANDA! SMOKEING IS NOT ONLY SEXY, BUT BY BUYING CIGGERETTES YOU SUPPORT AMERICAN CORPERATIONS!
WOAH...AHHH!!!
Hi, I'm an african american professional athlete who is overrated because of my skin color because being black allows you to exploit society and deprive talented rich white children of their futures.
I am a lowlife prostitute who supports the Democrat party as they will allow me to keep my job and spread Aids which I recieved from my lesbian lover.
HEEELP!!!!

 

by Goshi
10-08-03
Last time we left our hero he was tripping out in Baghdad:
I REPRESENT THE LIBERAL CAUSE WHICH IS BENT ON DESTROYING THE WORLD BECAUSE IT HATES GOD!
AHHH!!! LIBERALS!!!
Damn.. that's powerful shit.
TO BE CONTINUED....
Good freedom loving soldier, please take me to the Fox News headquarters. Flip has got to try my...medication.
...

 

by Goshi
10-09-03
GOD BLESS AMERICA YOU IRAQI SCUM!
TO BE CONTINUED...
Flip! You gotta try this shit!
Okay...

 

by Goshi
10-09-03
Flip then takes some of Rush's "medication".
I am a unemployed bum known as a Hippie who wastes valuable manpower by spreading corrupt rhetoric on peace and communism. I also advocate hard drugs that you conservatives are too big pussies to use
AHHH LIBERALS!
*gets shot and died*
...oops.
To be continued...
I told you that was strong shit.
I guess you were right. Lets go to central Baghdad and take some more.

 

by Goshi
10-10-03
BIZARRO!
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO!
I HATE THE BIZARROS!
BIZARRO!
I HATE THE BIZARROS!

 

by Goshi
10-12-03
I am Joseph Stalin, Communist Dictator who tricked the weak willed Liberals into selling me nukes. I may be dead but I live on in the heart of the Democrats everywhere.
Abortion and Gay Rights are the first step towards glorious anarchy. I also worship the anticrist.
To be continued...
Why the fuck do we keep doing this?
I have no idea. Let's continue it, maybe we will find out how to destroy liberals and free thought once and for all.

 

by Goshi
10-12-03
Note: Flip's interpretation of Jesus while on drugs is not necessarily correct.
JESUS!
Flip, you failed me! There are still people who are open to ideas that weren't accepted in the Middle Ages!
I'm sorry my lord.. is there any way you will forgive me?
Well...there is one thing you can do...
To be continued...
*suck suck*

 

by Goshi
10-12-03
Oh Rush Limbaugh! You are my hero! I listen to your show all the time!
Why thank you.
Is there any way I can please you, oh you sexy, brilliant man?
Well...
*suck suck*

 

by Goshi
10-12-03
What was really happening:
To be continued (and hopefully I'll stop copying Nevin)...
*suck suck*

 

by Goshi
10-12-03
Excuse me, do you know where that..pharmacist is?
...
Feh, stupid Iraqi who doesn't agree with my right wing view of life. Looks like I can't get any more of my...medication, I'll just take the rest of the pills while Flips out and see what happens.
To be concluded... (FINALLY!)
I am a fucker.
OMG HUGE BOTTLE OF PILLS!!!!

 

by Goshi
10-12-03
Rush took a huge amount of his "medication" and eventually wakes up somewhere...
Welcome to Edinburgh!
How the hell did I end up in Edinburgh? I guess it's time to hit the pubs!
Meanwhile in Washington:
Mr. President, I have recieved information from a very reliable source that Osama Bin Laden is currently in Scotland.
I knew it! We cannot show the terrorists we are weak, besides my popularity is lowering and I need a war to gain support again. Bomb those skirt wearing bastards!
The End

 

by Goshi
10-13-03
I TOUCH CHILDREN
Cool.
I'm Mrs. Goldstien an upper middle class Jew with a BMW. I have to drive my stupid kids to school and I can't even finish my damn bagel. Why is my life so tough? You Monks have it so easy.
Fuck you.
I'm not funny.
MY PEOPLE HAVE BEEN SUPRESSED ALMOST AS MUCH AS THE JEWS! TO REBEL I SHALL CHANGE MY NAME TO ALI MUHAMMED ISLAM AND SHOOT THEM WHITE DEVILS. PRAISE ALLAH!
Polytheistic is the way to be.

 

by Goshi
10-13-03
I love you asiangirl1.
I should call the cops shouldn't I?
WHY WON'T YOU LOVE ME!
I think I should be going about now.
*sigh* Why must love be so hard...
...

 

by Goshi
10-15-03
You have stole my ideas for the last time!
Please forgive me oh great Nevin!
Too late for talking! Prepare to die!
Ahhh
Damnit, I missed.
Goatse.cx

 

by Goshi
10-15-03

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