All comics by Nista

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by Nista
3-03-02
Sometimes I wonder why I exist...
The world is so big and I'm so - small. A mere understudy in this play called life...
WHAT IS IT ALL FOR????
Dude. You're fucked up again, aren't you.

 

by Nista
3-03-02
I am alone. Nobody here but me.
That's a good thing though, because that bean dip was getting to me.
What did you eat?
*pooooot*

 

by Nista
3-03-02
Hey man! I didn't know you had a website!
Huh?
Yeah, goatse.cx - Someone mentioned it in #slashdot tonight! I haven't seen it yet, but people sure were laughing a lot, you little jokester! I'm going to go home right now and check it out!
WTF?
What the???!!???!

 

by Nista
3-03-02
Queue, I was just thinking about what it will be like when we're married. We'll have a nice house, 5 or 6 kids, and a puppy! That will be so great. What are you thinking about?
...
...
...
... I gotta take a piss.

 

by Nista
3-03-02
This sucks. I need a job.
Yeah, with the economy being so bad, nobody wants a whore anymore.
Uh, what are you doing?
...
You said you needed a job, right?

 

by Nista
3-03-02
You know Queue...I've been thinking. Maybe we can try that thing you've wanted to do.
Really?
I've been way too uptight about that sort of thing lately. Should we give it a try?
Sure, I'm game if you are.
Uh, Queue? Why are your boxers wet on the inside?
Wet? in the front or back? Say Nista, this thong feels kind of nice. Can I keep it?

 

by Nista
3-03-02
Oh look, Queue is online.
[MisterQueue] Hey Nista...What's up?
[Nista] Just got home from work. You won't believe this luser on my phone tonight!
[MisterQueue] Yeah? Well I'm glad you're home. Listen...Sorry if I'm typing a little slowly tonight, this package is so big I have to hold it with both hands. My gr--
[Nista] Oh Queue...TAKE ME NOW!
[MisterQueue] Huh?

 

by Nista
3-04-02
Master? Where did you go?
I'm right here Gir...And be quiet! Do you want to wake up the whole neighborhood?
...
....
I dooo.
ugh.

 

by Nista
3-04-02
I want you to hit me as hard as you can.
...
Surprise me. Come on.
Can I stick my dick in your ear?
Why the ear, man?
Do me next.

 

by Nista
3-05-02
The Dell guy meets Jesus...
Dude. You're gettin a Dell.
...
*smite*
Loser.

 

by Nista
3-05-02
Hi. My name is Rita. Many of you reading this strip will have no idea why I'm saying any of this, but the point is that a select few of you will understand.
I guess what I'm trying to say is....
I'm painfully stupid. No, I mean it...I'm dumb as rocks. Furthermore, I suck and should never be trusted to do a schedule EVER AGAIN.

 

by Nista
3-07-02
Bob had bitch tits.
Big, sweaty tits.
I can't do this.

 

by Nista
6-30-02
Hey Q, how's it going?
Well 'Nista, pretty good since the crazy glue accident. Who knew the doctor would be so lighthearted about it...
Uh...
Yeah! He laughed the whole time! Through my screams of pain, everything! In fact, a whole group of doctors came in and were smiling from ear to ear!
...They were so professional though. One of them must have told a funny joke, because when he came in to tell me that the word "whore" was on my cock now, he was smiling and had tears in his eyes!!

 

by Nista
6-30-02
Okay... I wonder who's online.
Road Runner hates you. Please try again later.
5 hours later...
Aww, how sweet.
Signing on Trillian...... (Offline messages) Boyfriend: I LOVE YOU, CHECK YOUR EMAIL!!!!!!!
Incoming e-mail from "Boyfriend" - Subject: I LOVE YOU!!! CHECK TRILLIAN!!!!!!!

 

by Nista
7-10-02
Smoke me, man! Put your lips on my butt!
Uh, no.
Taste me, I'm delicious!
Liar.
Damn, I should learn to persuade faster.
Later....

 

by Nista
7-10-02
It was a horrible scene at the corner of Wilson and Foofles today as the city block was taken over by militant kangaroos.
Here's some footage from earlier today. They were absolutely ruthless. Residents of Ganafooka are still terrified.
That's it for WOOT News at 6, I'm George Maflappadoo.
And I'm Jessie Shababbala. Good night everyone.

 

by Nista
8-02-02
A/S/L??
LOL... 14/F/Ohio =)
KEWL. I AM 15/M/Ohio
Wot!!!1?? OMG, LOL!!! Wanna meet?
LOL... OK! IHOP okay 4U?
ok!!1 I will wear something pink and frilly. TTYL!! =) =)

 

by Nista
8-02-02
That morning, in the confessional...
Forgive me Father, for I have sinned.
Bless you my child. What sins have you committed?
Well father, I watched some gay porn this weekend. It was chock full of buttsex.
[long pause] Go on......
There was cock everywhere! Big ones, small ones...
*FAP FAP FAP* Oh...oh my. Yes, that is a - *UNF* horrible thing. Would you finish me off?

 

by Nista
8-02-02
Hey Joe. What's up?
Nothing. I just leveled up my Orc. He rules.
So, what do you want to do tonight?
I don't care. Whatever you want to do. What do you want to do tonight?
I hadn't thought of anything. That's why I was asking you.
I love you so much babe, I want you to decide!

 

by Nista
8-02-02
I love you too sweetie, but surely you've got --
I LOVE YOU MORE!
*mumble* My god.
Did you say Neverwinter Nights? Cool! I'll set up the module where the women's titties bounce.
Dork.
Hey babe? Uh...Where are you going? Oh I get it! You're going to take a shower you (door slams) Uh, babe? The shower isn't in your car....

 

by Nista
8-02-02
I'd just like to say that the last strip I did was totally in bad taste.
While I was poking fun at my relationship, it was all in good fun. I love my boyfriend and someday Elvis will marry us.
I make fun of a LOT of people. Someday I might make fun of you. Oh if you could be so lucky! Anyway, don't any of you bitches be narcin' on my shizzle.

 

by Nista
11-02-02
Hi, my name is Turbo Deschutes, and I'm here to fix the copier..I didn't think anyone would be working this late, especially a pretty lady like you.
...
Could you tell me where I could start working?
Damn, sugar... You can start working right here! *points down*
Wocka chicka wocka chicka wocka chicka wocka chicka...
*uNF uNF uNF*
Wheeeeee! I'm riding the cracka express!

 

by Nista
11-29-02
Hi. I'm Mister Touristhead.
I drive on the interstate REEALLY slow, slamming my brakes every time I see a mall.
So I just wanted to apologize to those of you trying to get somewhere today that didn't involve Capatalist whoring.

 

by Nista
12-12-02
I'm so glad we could talk. It's just that I get so mad at you for not working. It's hard to do this on my own!
I know. I'm sorry.
One income for the two of us isn't enough!
Yeah. But if it's any 'constellation' to you, I get mad at you too.
For what?
Uh, that one time you smoked my last Izmir Stinger.

 

by Nista
2-26-04
You got your religion in our politics!
Meanwhile, at the Whitehouse...
Hundreds of people are lining up...
You got your politics in my religion!

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