All comics by Raze

Profile

 

by Raze
3-07-02
What the fuck are you doing?
I'm a happy-go-lucky and slighty pornographic dog rolling on a ball. What the fuck are YOU doing?
Sitting. On a bench. Thinking deep thoughts. I wonder how long it takes to choke a dog wearing short-shorts?
A pornographic dog. Now I'm fully desensitized.

 

by Raze
3-07-02
Welcome to Suburbia. Exhibit A: white trash. That about covers the town's population.
Ouch. My ass hurts.
Exhibit B: the druggies. All family's hate them; all family's have one. Sorta convoulted.
Actually I'm a extremely skanky whore. Wanna fuck?
Ok then. Exhibit C: uhhh.....Jesus?
Believe in me because I'm a good person. And I've got nice abs.

 

by Raze
3-08-02
I don't feel like getting my lazy ass off this bench, so let's continue. Exibit E: Little girls. You will often find them roaming the streets begging strangers for Korean candy.
So do ya have some? Do ya?
These girls are known to be extremely sensitive.
Sometimes we wear little bows in our hair! Hey, that rhymes!
Let's test out that theory. You suck, stupid little girl.
What, my you think I'm some kind of underaged prosititute? Perv.

 

by Raze
3-08-02
Hey Jake. Wassup?
Notta thing, man. We missed you at the soccer party. Don't you just love kicking other people's balls?
I've been introducing these kind people to the hell that is suburbia.
Did you mention that we all look the same, talk the same, feel the same, and are all secretely gay?
........I guess I forgot to mention that. Wanna fuck?
Fuck if I know.

 

by Raze
3-09-02
I don't feel like getting my lazy ass off this bench, so let's continue. Exibit E: Little girls. You will often find them roaming the streets begging strangers for Korean candy.
So do ya have some? Do ya?
These girls are known to be extremely sensitive.
Sometimes we wear little bows in our hair! Hey, that rhymes!
Let's test out that theory. You suck, stupid little girl.
What, my you think I'm some kind of underaged prosititute? Perv.

 

by Raze
3-09-02
After a brief accident, our heros return back to the...uh....present. And they're still just as jaded.
I think we did a little time traveling. Why the fuck did I talk about the little asian girls again?
Maybe all those Reeeesussss Pieeecceess have finally got to ya, man.
Or maybe it's all that Coke.
..........
I mean the soda, you know.
Sad.

 

by Raze
3-09-02
Lookie! We're flying high in the sky! The sun's so bright it hurts my eyes!
Have you seen American Pie? That trombone scene made me wiggle and jiggle. And when I heard about it, thought it was a lie!
You a silly litte girl, Ry. *whisper* I hate fucking rhyming. so how's the black market on the Korean?
Goin' good. We're trying to move shipments, but it's starting to become a hassle. Damn North Koreans.
.......We're falling, aren't we?
At least we're not dealing with the French. They fuck their candy before and after it's brought into the stores. Sick bastards.

 

by Raze
3-09-02
Ry. We're falling now.
And let's not get into the British. They always need a little afternoon tea with their candy. Did you know some of the men are comfortable calling themselves girls?
Uh, Ry. We're going to die.
I thought you said you hated to rhyme, Sy! And there's always the Americans. I was born here, but I mean we have a monopoly on everything except sex toys. That honor goes to the Spanish.Think Maracas.
You never stop, do you?
Only during my period.

 

by Raze
3-09-02
Black Market: Retrospective.
The author apologizes for anyone he might have offended in the process.
Even though that Black Market thing made no fucking sense.
Not only did it make no sense, it's not over.
No doubt. What the fuck were those girls talking about?
I think it had something to do with the long term enviromental effects of underwater masturbation.
..........oh.
Dude, it was so obvious! Those chicks just want to get LAID.

 

by Raze
3-09-02
For the record, we don't want to get LAID.
We're too young to even know what that means.
And we made perfect sense. Especially that part about American Pie.
But it was actually American Pie 2. I feel like having some hot pie myself. All this velocity is making me frisky.
What's underwater masturbation?
How the fuck should I know? I'm just a nice litte virgin. In fact, I don't even know what a virgin is! ............ When we land, do you have any extra condoms? I ran out.

Showing page 1.