All comics by arc_command

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by arc_command
1-03-03
Arc_command finds himself from being kicked from the clan channel for awhile. We meet our character here. In city ruins of the future of clan )HW(.
Where the hell am I?
Yes Arc this is clan hellswarriors. (clan )HW( )
The hell isn't this clan )HW(?
Sweet mother of hell what HAPPENED?!

 

by arc_command
1-03-03
Arc walks about 5 miles along the ruins of his clan.
Damnit Kilaz-E-Forge kicked me out not just me but everyone out of the clan. Thanks to the bot it unbanned everyone. Also thanks to LadyD)HW(. But damn Forged left a huge mess.
Hey a survivor from the apocalypse!
HEY! Stalker)HW(!
Uuugh....What happened Arc?

 

by arc_command
1-03-03
What do you remember?
All I remember Forge kicked me into a portal which is the future I guess. When I was out of the portal I saw this war with clan kilaz and )HW(.... Unfortunately our clan lost..AND EVERYONES DEAD!!=(
Thats just sad.. Lady..D And DH also?*sniff*
I'm afraid so my friend..*sniff*
Hey why ARE we crying anyway. We could just find another portal that can send us back to the past. When the bot unbans everyone and LadyD)HW( fixed the problem?
GRAND IDEA!...But where are we gonna find another portal?

 

by arc_command
1-03-03
As the two search for the portal...
Crapper....
I don't know where we gonna find a portal...
Errrr, RIght
Worse comes to worse right?
We probably die in the wilderness..
HEY HEY!!! Don't go to the bar you guys!
How about we go find a Bar?
GREAT IDEA.. I'll get some cinderblocks and beer!

 

by arc_command
1-03-03
YAY We made it to the bar!
Weeee lets get drunk!
I hope we don't get too drunk..
I wonder if dawgday is in the bar!
They go into the bar, get beer and.....
Damn I'm hosed...
I don't wanna take another sip of beer...ugh...

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
As they left the bar they decide to relax on a large field...
Lets go find that portal...
What shall we do now? I think we relaxed long enough to make us drunk free now.
Alright, I'll kill some wild jackals for food.
Great Idea.. I'll gather some food from trees thats on the field.
Who the hell are you?
I'm a rengade robot named Xeno....PREPARE TO DIE!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Hey what does this button do on you?
Uhhh.....*shrugs* Nothing!
Hmm *presses button on mad robot*
AGGHH...
Heheheh, Like i didn't know that button would make him fire himself.. Heheheh
Damn...You..*Burns to a crisp*

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Who you callin' chicken you pussy.
Heh a chicken to hunt.
Screw you, I'm going home.
I'm gonna get it *aims arrow at chicken*
Ow.. You shot me you asshole.
Die chicken! *shoots arrow*

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
I got a chicken!
I got some food rations!
Lets get outta this field this places getting weird.
Righto!
These bombs look harmless.
AGH Duck and cover! Someones bombing Bnet!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Well yeah, I thought we can't die like if our names was in the title.
Look over there!!! DOES THAT LOOK HARMLESS TO YOU!
Ok!
Oh god, A missle hit me! Stalker get water fast!
All be right over I found wat.. AHHHH I'm on fire!!!
Hurry Stalker! I'm burning to a crisp!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
We seriously must do STOP,DROP,AND ROLL!!
Your on fire too Stalker?
Stop,Drop,and roll!Stop,Drop,and roll!Stop,Drop,and roll!
Stop,Drop,and roll!Stop,Drop,and roll!Stop,Drop,and roll!
Ahh, Much much better.
Ya think?

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
After fifteen days of walking, running, stop drop and rolling they found the portal!
TH\his is our portal?
Yeah, you got a problem with that?
Yay, We finally found the portal.
Lets go in then!
Ughhh, I think I'm gonna be sick.
Man time travel portal take a beating outta us. I don't feel very well. I hope we don't end up in a parrellel universe!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
It'll take 10 days and 10 nights.
How long does this traveling take?
Well we've been here 5 hours now.
10 days later...
Finally, we are back in our time!
Yeah, Finally
We are home in clan )HW(!
Yeah, sooo you wanna catch up to the meeting? Today is the meeting!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Well this is a long walk.
The clan is two more blocks away.
We'll explain it when we get back.
Arc_command)HW(, Stalker)HW(, where have you guys been?
Well lets go. Follow Speed)HW(!
Yeah, The clan only has 20 minutes before the meeting starts!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
A fifteen minute walk later...
Crap! My watch says 5 minutes till meeting lets hurry in before they start without us!
Well here we are at the clan meeting autitorium.
Now lets login to the clan that we're here.
Give me your card. To verify you are Stalker)HW(. *Gets Stalker's card* Thank you.
Alright, now lets go to the meeting.
*bzzt* Access Approved *bzzt* Welcome back arc_command)HW(, and Stalker)HW(.*bzzt* Ok I logged us in

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
DH we have so much to tell you during the meeting!
Welcome back Stalker and Arc.
I was kicked for 2 days because of forged.......I came back 2 days later.....everything..was..in..ruins.................................Me and Stalker we're in the future that survived.
So the kilaz clan are planning an attack 2 days later?! We lost because they had nuclear weapons of mass destruction and futuristic weapons?!
So... I better get to forging tempered weapons then right?
Thats right to prepare for the war.

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
DH: Now that everyones quiet Arc and Stalker gave me information about the future.
Phew I'm not late in the clan meeting lounge.
Yeah good thing we are not.
Dh: Arc saw that the clan was in ruins when kilaz raged war on us with futuristic weapons and nuclear weapons of mass destruction.
Thats a good sign.
EVERYONE READ THE SIGN!
DH: We must prepare for the war as they came abck from the furture 2 days later... Now ANy questions?.....No? Good now lets get to work on weapons for us.
Snoopy)HW( is here!
23475)HW('s here. And LadyD)HW(,Jargone)HW(, Romeo)HW(, and DragonElbow is behind me.

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
So Speed)HW(, What weapon are you making? I'm making some tempered x6 to any blade weapons.
I'm inventing the beam saber, Beam axe, phasers, mega lazers, and a beam sythes and sickles.
Releasing the latest versions of my robots battle system, Most of them has the X unit and the Zero unit in them.
So what are you making DH? I'm making Varia suits, Gravity suits, and a grappler beam blaster.
What are you making 236475)HW(? I'm finding more and buying more Mana spell books today.
I'm training orcs and humans. Hiring Mercenaries of humans and orcs. Ok Snoopy)HW(?

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Now to program the robots.
I got a Zenith Chip.*bzzt*
I got Zero Chip! *bzzzt*
Yahoo! I got the X unit!
Meanwhile in CLan )HW('s garden (mostly forest) heres Jargone relaxing.
It's a nice day outside.. No thanks Shitbot 2000
Hello I am Shitbot 2000. How may I help you?

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Who are you talking to Jargone?
I'm talking to Shitbot 2000.
Whos that?
I think you know it come see him.
AHHHHH!! KILLER ROBOT!!!!
Die bitch! DIEEE!!!!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Its the button again! *pushes it and strips the robot of insignia*
ARRRGH!! NOT AGAIN!
Heh.. Defeated like last time eh? *looks at insignia* Clan kilaz product I shoulda known.
Agh Mother fucking ass...*burns to a crisp*
*Looks at it* Ah, Clan Kilaz pulled up the spy friendly robot trick eh?
Look Jargone at this insignia. That so called Shitbot 2000 was a spy worker for Clan Kilaz.

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Are you sure you should let that fire stay lit?
OK,ok I'll put it out.
*Splashes a Bucket of water on flame*
Heheheh... He doesn't know I'm indestructible now.. muahahahahahahahahahhaaa!!!!!!!
OMG YOUR STILL ALIVE!!!! Jargone Go alert everyone Kilaz Killer Robot spy!
I'm indestructible now. I'm not immune to fire anymore! Now you die!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
DH on Intercom: Everyone Prepare for battle! Red robot from kilaz! THIS IS NOT A TEST..I Repeat THIS IS NOT A TEST!
Jargone whats the rush? Ok Jargone!
Code Red! Kilaz Killer robot is Here to spy on us! Arc is blocking him from entering each moment!
DH on intercom: Alright..
236475)HW( here for battle!
Stalker here! And Dh everyone else is playing a game so we are the only ones to fight.
I'm here to fight too you guys even though I'm on the intercom.
Unit Zero is here to fight too.

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Hey look its Kilaz-E-Forged!
Time for you to... Huh where?
Hello Forged?......
Goddamnit.....

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES THE ROBOTS INDESTRUCTIBLE!!!
Come back here!!
Arc, I got a plan lead him into my robot programming room. The bots will take care of him now run along!
Ok!
In here of course!
Which way did he go?

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Thanks!
Sucker.
*Closes door and locks it* Haha!
Prepare for your worst nightmare!
Its so dark in here! Uhh WHERE THE DOOR GO!! Mommy...

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Muahahahahhahhaaa!
Oh CRAP!!!!!
Hehehehehehehheheh....
Forged HELP ME!!!!!!!!! AAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
AHHHHHHHH HELP!! *Crack* *Glass shattering*
Looks like the bots done their jobs. I Better check on them.*opens the door*
You guys ok?
We are all right. *Bzzt*
We just got finished cremating him.*beep*

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
DH: Attention Everyone Code red over problem taken care of. Time: 9:50 P.M.
I still can't believe that robot would fall for that trick! The Point and tell someones there and run trick.
Nice move Arc. Lets get to sleep in our clan quarters.
ZZTV Now Presents ZZT Survivor!
Ah, My quarter time to get some sleep.
Now to program more of the website database. Then I'll get some sleep.

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
TIME: 5:00AM
*YAWN* Boy I'm fully awake and.... HEY WHERE THE HELL IS MY TV!
Yeah, I stole it you wanna fight?! Then Bring it on!
HEY YOU STOLE MY TV!! DROP IT OR I KICK YOUR ASS!
DIE BITCH DIE!!!

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
OW!!
MAGIC MISSLE!
Ohh God It BURNS!@*#!
*Puts a Mana shield on the tv* Heheheheh FIRE!
Alright Alright I'll give back your Stupid TV!
Thank you! It this tv was designed for me. All my good shows and channels. (Default Channel ZZTV)

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Someone tried to steal my TV.
What was that all about?
I'm hungry, lets go to the commissary and get some breakfast.
Same here..
Arriving in the elevator...
Well onto the commissary we go *pushes number 2*
Do you think this will take awhile?

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
Must get food quick.
I need some food.
Hello, Stalker and I want Steak & Eggs, A Pepsi Twist, A Coca-cola, and Scrambled Eggs for me, Chicken Piece Combo for Him.
Ok, Coming right up. That'll be $20.00
*Pays the 20 dollars*
Thank you. Your food will be in 30 minutes.

 

by arc_command
1-04-03
So whens the food ready?
IN 30 minutes..
30 minutes later...
Finally, I already got hunger pains and Stalker's Starving his ass!
Food is ready sir.
1hr and 30 minutes later....
*Burp* Hoo boy I'm stuffed. I can't eat another bite.
*Barf* Don't mention food please. Or I might barf again. *Belch*

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
DH on Intercom: Stalker, Arc, and 236475 report to my office for an assignment!
Welp lets go.
I wonder what the job is.
This mission I want you to do is very very Top Secret. We must not let Clan Kilaz members know! You must retrieve the Khaydarin and Khalis crystal. So we can have our equipment enhanced.
I'm here.
The Reaver here..
What?

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
Ancient artifacts of Starcraft that can power up certain types of armor and weapons. But in the game they use it to get rid of the zerg.
What are these "Khaydarin" and "Khalis" Crystals?
I think I can come in handy when I summon the Reaper.
Dude you are the Reaper. Unless your refering the Grim Reaper.
You know you shouldn't talk your plans when someone is behind you. Now its time for you to die.
So the )HW( gonna find the Crystals eh? This will be a great advantage to steal them. But first I must tell my clan.............Crap

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
I Summon the Reaper *Summons* Get that Kilaz clan member!
*poof* As you wish.
Time to slay your soul.
AHHHHHHHHH, NOOOOOOOOOO!
Ah, a new soul for my collection.
AHHHhhhhhhh.......*soul is in the reaper's hands*

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
Dh on TransCom: Your on the crystals coordinates.
So DH, How much longer till we reach the Crystal Khaydarin?
Lets dig.
We dug everywhere. And we haven't found the crystal.
Stalker might find it 236475.
Dh loading the crystal at the clan )HW( office of his.......25%.......50%.....75%.......100% complete now recieving Khaydarin crystal.
I found it! Dh here it comes I'm sneding it to you with the Transcom.

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
In 4 hrs the three are in the valley taking a 1 hr break.
Well that was easy. To find the Khaydarin crystal.
I doubt it. There's sometimes not right. Because it seemed too easy.
Ohh Crap.
Where have you taken the Khaydarin crystal?!
AHHH! Guys help!
Die of my fiery strength!

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
*yawn* Whats going on? (STalker is sleeping on the ground)
Khaydarin Crystal Guardian!
Magic Missle!
I'll get outta your way.
What the hell? *Deflects Magic missle attempt* Nice try. But magic can't defeat me.

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
Umm, here take this dog and this dull spoon.
What do I do with them?
Nuder the dog with the dull spoon.
OK!
Oh My god, What a sad, sick bastard.
Cmon little dog lemme nuder you with this dull spoon.

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
How long is he gunna do that?
Beats me.
30 minutes later...
I wonder if they're done yet.
I'll go check.
Holy shit! They nuder eachother then they got cremated together! THAT IS JUST SICK!!

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
They reached the coords at 9:00PM. They must hurry before the cataclysm starts.
We are almost at the coordinates that DH told us about.
Woo, its night time and we haven't slept. Better hurry before its 12:00AM.
I found the Khalis Guardian! ..... ITS OSAMA BIN LADEN!
Rararara! Ybebebebebe! (Stay outta my way Khalis Crystal is mine!)
Die OSAMA!

 

by arc_command
1-05-03
Ooo Let me join in the fight!
Ok.
Let me join in too!
Ok.
Osama's Thoughts: So Much Pain!

 

by arc_command
1-07-03
Well the after math of the beating of Osama.
Sending of the crystal complete!
Woo-hoo Osama is toast!
You can say that again because he ain't comin' back!
Come with us, Osama Bin Laden with your friend Saddam! For I am a morman.
Noooooo!! The Mormans came to take me in like they did Saddam! AHHHHHHHHH!!!! AIEEEEEEEE!!!

 

by arc_command
1-07-03
DH on ComLink: I'll make you a portal to go home right now the crystals are empowering the armor and weapons. The Forging will be done by 1:00 AM.
Well we should beat the Kilaz clan now in the incoming war.
Yep, And I hope We win so we don't end up back in the cataclysm.
Whoa, I feel sick in this portal of traveling.
Thats how Stalker and I felt when we went into a portal.
I'm tired from beating the shit outta Osama. That was hard because he was a moron and he smelled like shit.

 

by arc_command
1-09-03
As the three get back. The forging and training heavily begins. The battle will start on 5:00AM.
The weapons of mine are finished. The one I wield is Atma's Weapon,and all over genji armor but the Genji shield.
Ah, The ol Atma Weapon project completed eh? Well I finished my C-10 Phaser, Ion Gun, and Phase Distruptor.
With DH and Stalkers Forging.
Equipping all robots with Zeta Armor. I am equipped with Ion Gun, Marine Combat Armor, Dragoon Boots, and Grappler techniques. You?
I have made the DD Bow (Doomsday Bow) wearing Genji amor, gloves, and helm. And got a present from Arc. His Gladiator arrows they explode on impact.
12:00AM. With SNoopy)HW( and 236475)HW(.
I have become a typical Magic important Magus. Very high in defence magic and attack magic. High on Physical Defence.
Well Arc gave me his prized Death Star Sickle. I have trained 250 ranged fighters, 5000 close range combaters, 300 siege, 6000 medics, 150 mages, and an Armed Monkey!

 

by arc_command
1-10-03
Next day....
GET OUTTA THIS BUNkER Kilaz-E-Forged!
Shut up you pussy! I'm holding you hostage, pussy!
You homo! Head hammerers' are always homos!
Take that back you queer. I'm NOT GAY!! Grrrrr.
WHO the HELL are YOU callin' a MASTURBATOR! You fucking fat shit can't even say things right! And you know what? I'm MAGIC RESISTANT YOU DUMBASS!
That'll put him outta fuckin' commision for masturbating!.............................Oh crap!

 

by arc_command
1-10-03
*Jargone is getting pissed* *Jargone switches setting to Jargone Is Pissed mode* I'm gunna chop you in your prime Asshole! You can't even pick up a girl!
Fight me ya whore. FIght!
*stabs Kilaz-E-Masta in the nut with her pointy wand*
Oh god...... That hurts badly....Ahhhh my grion!...
*kicks Masta in the balls and pushes while kicking his nut* Take that you bastard!
Blarg!

 

by arc_command
1-15-03
*unsheathes sword and slashes Kilaz-E-Forged* Die homo! I have a ring of magic immunity!
Blargaaaaah!.....
After a long way into another bunker..
Ahhaahhh.. Rats please sex me up... *dies*
GOOOAAAAAL!! GOAL,GOAL,GOAL,GOOOAAAAALL!!!!

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