All comics by cbillioux

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by cbillioux
10-12-02
After reading Garrett's comics, it quickly became obvious that this should be emulated and exploited.
This online comic thing is great!
I'm not so sure about making fun of our friends though.
Chris B. and Stuart jump at the opportunity.
That's why we only make fun of people we hate.
What if those people ARE our friends...or think they are?
Well... Chris B. jumps.
Well, then they're stupid for thinking that. And that's probably why we hate them.
This will end badly. Best to skip town ahead of time.

 

by cbillioux
10-12-02
Oh, hi Garrett. What can I do for you?
You are totally stepping all over my turf.
Oh well, I hope that we can both inhabit this graphic world in peace.
Haven't you been warned about my wrath. I'll evicerate you in comic styling! This is war!
I was hoping you would feel that way.
Damn it! Competition. The only thing I'm not prepared for.

 

by cbillioux
10-12-02
Chad and Stokey join our little world
Is this for real? I'm a god damned penguin! This is insulting.
YOU'RE INSULTED?! I'm Steve the gay guy.
Let's get the hell out of here before this gets worse.
I'm with you.
Oh yeah, Drew too.
Hey, wait for me! Actually, this isn't so bad. I look goooood.

 

by cbillioux
10-12-02
Stuart and Chris plan their next comic:
So, any good ideas?
Well, I had this one really great one. But I can't find any appropriate graphics.
I'm thinking of using this...thing...somehow.
What's your idea about, again... exactly?
Well, it involves this panda, right. But the trick is, he's got this robot arm, and you see... He's named Bob. And he has a dog. Named Bob...and there's a NINJA!
If I concentrate hard enough, there's GOT to be a way to make his head explode

 

by cbillioux
10-12-02
The brothers are reunited.
It's good to be back in Natch. again.
No shit. It's going to kick ass being the two smartest people in town.
Whoa dude! You can't have me thinking things like that. Garrett always portrays me as an arrogant ass.
Aw, brotherly love.
Sorry, my comic.
But... people are already jealous of my immense intellect..........bastard.

 

by cbillioux
10-12-02
We've been playing a lot of GTA3 recently
Do you think that the game is going to start affecting us in our everyday life?
No. Our wills are strong.
Did you see?-
No. Keep walking.

 

by cbillioux
10-12-02
Hey, you know we've been saying "devilish" a lot recently; why hasn't it crept into the comic?
Cause Chad's only been in one strip so far.
Have at it Chad:
Guys, Your comic is DEVILISH!
(How does intellectual property work again?)
Hey, let's get drunk and find some EEE's!
That explains it.

 

by cbillioux
10-12-02
Jenny Rhea puts her two cents in.
So check it out. I want you to put me in your strip as a rock star.
Look, it is a comic but I can only bend reality so much. If you push it too far you end up like Christianity.
I don't appreciate that comment on several levels.
I wasn't aware that you operated on more than one level.
Chris promptly pockets the change.
Good comeback. Apparently I was right.

 

by cbillioux
10-13-02
What the default panel looks like:
::shudders:: Dude, those little Asian kids are creeping me out! Look at their eyes! Their EYES!
You think that's scary? How about this over here?
What?! Who USES these things?!!

 

by cbillioux
10-13-02
So, you're a blackbelt, right? But I'm big. And you really don't look that threatening
Dude, are you kidding? These wings are finely honed deadly weapons!
So you're saying that I COULDN'T beat you?
It's just a matter of skill.
(Based on an actual conversation)
I have an axe- YOU don't even have thumbs. I rest my case.
...I will SO peck your eyes out.

 

by cbillioux
10-13-02
Hey, Alex, what are you guys up to tonight?
Hmm...We'll probably all congregate at my house and stare mindlessly at the TV screen as we take turns sapping our life away via the PS2.
So this is what you are going to do with your life?
...
...
So, wanna come?

 

by cbillioux
10-13-02
Check it dog. I am the smoothest pimp ever.
This can only end badly.
So... you are 18 right?
Um...I like ponies.
Karma. The single biggest reason Mike should have studied more eastern philosophy.
So... you are 18 right?
This is totally not cool.

 

by cbillioux
10-13-02
Apparently, drinking begins really early on Sundays.
Hey Chris Owens. Want to go and get some lunch?
I can't. That would mean I have to stop smoking.
You've been drinking all morning haven't you?
Well, it's football day.
Really early.
Could you at least look me in the eyes?
I can't. If I don't hold my head like this, I throw up in my mouth.

 

by cbillioux
10-13-02
Sunday evening= essay writing time
hey, what you doing?
I'm writing about how Poe's juxtaposition of first-person omnicient view and a mysterious and oppressive tone lends itself to his overall motiff of "some never-to-be-imparted secret"
...
You've been sniffing paint again, haven't you?
It's the fastest way for my brain to commit suicide.

 

by cbillioux
10-14-02
Two masterminds meet to plot.
Ok Dubbya, so I kept my part of the deal and gave you a reason to frighten America.
You sure did Saddam.......Why did you do that again?
A mastermind and his accomplice.
...so you could gain control of the country without the annoying restraints of checks and balances.
Oh. Right. Uhhh........and we wanted that because...?
Jesus Christ.
Uhh...look...we want take power...us control countries...final step conquer world...got it?
Look, can you handle the rest? I have an 11:30 tee off time.

 

by cbillioux
10-14-02
(Music) "Janie's got a gun..."
THIS is why I'm against gun control; it would get rid of great songs like this.
Ummm, you know, I don't think gun control gets rid of SONGS that TALK about guns.
No, no, no, think about it. Bubba never would have shot that jukebox if there'd been a three-day waiting period.
...
Or "The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia"; you can't accuse people of murder if there're no guns!! So you have to have guns if you want good music!
I wish I had a gun. Right now.

 

by cbillioux
10-14-02
"So, how did that theme song to "A View to a Kill" go again?"
You know, "Meeting you, with a view to a kill. It's me in the-"
"HER NAME IS RIO, AND SHE DANCES ON THE SAND!"
...huh?
What? The song IS by Duran Duran, right?
Chad: cursed with a congenital defect that prevents him from "getting" music
um...yes?
Then, by definition, it's Rio. Or at the very least, it sounds just like it.

 

by cbillioux
10-14-02
Chris, I brought you these flowers to thank you for everything you have done for me.
It was only a tattoo, Paul. No big deal.
I love the tattoo. But that's not all. You have given me character and personality.
Awww shucks, it was my pleasure.
You are a golden god.
I should have gotten a comic years ago.

 

by cbillioux
10-14-02
Chris always seems able to help me with my comics
So, how's the new comic coming along?
Pretty well. What do you think if it so far?
hmmmm...
"...I hate every bone in the worthless waste of flesh that he calls a body..."
Pretty edgy stuff, eh?
Sort of, but it's not really scathing enough... Say something about his penis.

 

by cbillioux
10-14-02
I've got to come clean.
Ahem. Few people realize that I'm fueled creatively by my MASSIVE hatred for Bo Scott.
Why, you ask?
I CANNOT HANDLE WRITTEN INSULTS; I LOSE CONTROL! IF YOU EVER WRITE SOMETHING BAD ABOUT ME AGAIN I WILL NOT BE RESPONSIBLE FOR MY ACTIONS AND I WILL BEAT YOU UP!
Oh yes, do that. Do that right now, please. Oh please oh please oh please...
Woops, looks like I just "accidentally" insulted him again. Darn, I certainly hope he doesn't try and beat me up.
Dude, it's cool. He'll probably end up dropping out of school... Again.

 

by cbillioux
10-14-02
One day at evil jedi training camp.
You know, you have come along so well in your training that I may graduate you early.
Really?
When you first got here, you seemed hesitant about how biting I might get.
That's true, I guess I was a little worried.
Then, yesterday you said you'd rather suck off George Bush daily than be born as Bo Scott.
You make a good argument. This disciple thing is cool.

 

by cbillioux
10-14-02
Well, we haven't actually met yet but I must say your reputation precedes you.
You've just heard things people say about me out of jealousy. Hate the game not the player.
Actually, it's from the things which have come out of your mouth.
Oh shit, you mean you know I'm a homophobe and a racist. oooo. Big deal. I'm not smart enough to realize that's not kosher.
...
That sharp pain you just felt was your brain recoiling to protect its integrity.

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