All comics by mutster101

 

by mutster101
11-21-05
Are you really bored too?
Yeah. How are we ever going to relieve this endless monotony?
I've got my Magic: The Gathering cards.

 

by mutster101
11-21-05
Very poor start
At least he hasn't started slipping in references no one will get
Oh well

 

by mutster101
11-21-05
We're both sweet and innocent
Very sweet. Very innocent.
But then...
You didn't see that, right?

 

by mutster101
11-21-05
Somewhere, in an innocent field...
But then...
Nobody knows I'm really a Demon from the pits of Hell

 

by mutster101
11-22-05
Not impressed
Me either
For starters, in that last one, clearly all the readers know she's really a demon
I'm really a demon
No you're not
Spoilsport

 

by mutster101
11-22-05
Before we crashed here I was in a rock band! You've probably heard of me.
Do I look like a groupie to you?
I dunno. They all become a blur after a while.
Nah. It's not the groupies that make your eyesight go.

 

by mutster101
11-22-05
Somewhere, in an innocent office...
It looks like you're trying to write a Hellspawn strip...
But then...
Heh
It looks like you're trying to do a very predictable joke...

 

by mutster101
11-22-05
We're running low on food. I'm off to hunt wild boar
What if there are no wild boar?
We resort to cannibalism
You mean someone might have to eat me?
Let's hope it doesn't come to that
Boy, did you ever miss the point

 

by mutster101
11-22-05
It looks like you're trying desperately to get laid...
Damn straight. C'mere and give me some hot paperclip action
Loser

 

by mutster101
11-22-05
Somewhere, in an innocent classroom...
Sorry Miss. It won't happen again Miss
You have to stop splatting the other children. We're running out of pupils
But then...
You expect me to splat my teacher? That would be evil!

 

by mutster101
11-23-05
Another murder to solve? How depressing. Why can't there be an end to all the killing? Isn't there any love left in the world?
You drained all the love from the world last week, mighty Cthulhu
I did? What was I thinking?
I think it was the usual idea of crushing the world beneath your diabolical heel, mighty Cthulhu
Ah yes, of course. Just a minute... what heel? I only have tentacles
Do I need to explain about metaphors again, mighty Cthulhu?

 

by mutster101
11-23-05
So, what have we got? Are the autopsy results back yet?
The victim was shot 8 times, electrocuted, drowned, set on fire, then thrown out of a thirty-first storey window, mighty Cthulhu
Hmmm. The killer's certainly thorough then.
It would seem so, mighty Cthulhu
Well, at least that eliminates anyone from the Helpdesk
You are as wise as you are terrible, mighty Cthulhu

 

by mutster101
11-23-05
I got your message about the murder, mighty Cthulhu. You said you've found a lead?
Yes. One of those clever ones that lets you adjust how freely the dog can roam while you're walking
They didn't have sarcasm in the Old World, did they, mighty Cthulhu?
No. Only endless pain and suffering
Then that's great! The case is as good as solved, mighty Cthulhu!
Excellent

 

by mutster101
11-23-05
Somewhere, in a far from innocent Hell Dimension...
But then...
Aww, pretty
Something's not right here

 

by mutster101
11-23-05
Hmmm. I can see what he's trying to do, but it doesn't work, does it?
Never stopped him before
The Cthulhu strip shows promise, but I expect the jokes will run out before long
Not like in our strip then

 

by mutster101
11-23-05
Ah, a bar. Should we check for clues?
No, mighty Cthulhu. We should relax and have a drink.
But we need to find the killer!
Why, mighty Cthulhu? What interest does the Old World's Most Foul have in catching a murderer?
I want to make him a minion, naturally
I should have guessed, mighty Cthulhu

 

by mutster101
11-25-05
A penguin? But this is a desert island!
Penguins crash land on desert islands too!
No they don't
They don't? How did I get here then?
It's another mystery I guess
At least on a desert island there'll be no Polar Bears to worry about

 

by mutster101
11-25-05
I'm sorry my lead came to nothing
That's okay, mighty Cthulhu. We'll come up with something. We need to find a reliable witness
I have some ideas about that...
Later...
We've reason to believe you were the last to see the deceased alive
You have got to be kidding

 

by mutster101
11-25-05
I'm afraid I can't help you. The confidentiality of my clients is sacrosanct
Client? This poor bastard was killed several times over. We need to know who did it
I can assure you, they were only killed once
By who?
Actually, it's 'by whom'. If you can't be bothered to learn to use the language properly I can't be bothered to answer your question
Oh, lighten up misery guts

 

by mutster101
11-25-05
You think if Cthulhu and Cow ever solve that murder the strip will end?
We can but hope
Harsh
But fair
Come on, we have to prepare for tomorrow night

 

by mutster101
11-27-05
Aha! A penguin. Food!
Have you ever tasted penguin? Tastes like donkey dung
How would you know that? On both counts
When you've been stuck on this island as long as I have...
...you'll eat ANYTHING?
Oops. Probably shouldn't have said that

 

by mutster101
11-27-05
Somewhere, in an innocent Maximum Security Black Ops Base...
Sorry miss, this is a restricted area, I'm going to have to ask you to move along
But then...
Rats
Sorry miss, I'm also splat-proof. You WILL have to move along

 

by mutster101
11-27-05
Nice place you've got here
It's not much, but it's home, mighty Cthulhu
I hadn't realised what thirsty work this detectiving is. Got anything to drink?
Glass of milk, mighty Cthulhu?
  . . .  
It's fresh, mighty Cthulhu

 

by mutster101
11-28-05
You seem to have been in the area at the time of the murder... who are you?
I'm just your regularsupernatural superhero. I slay evil things: Vampires, Demons, Evil Robots...
Hmmm, I don't think the victim was noteably evil. Or a vampire or such.
...and ANCIENT EVIL HELL GODS
Terribly sorry to have trespassed on your time, Miss. I'll just be moving along

 

by mutster101
11-28-05
I'm fireproof!
And boomproof
*sniff*
Just give it up already, would you?

 

by mutster101
11-28-05
*sniff*
Please don't cry
You are unwise to lower your defences!
Grrr
Still here

 

by mutster101
11-29-05
We're not getting anywhere with this investigation
We need to try another tack, mighty Cthulhu
What's wrong with the one we've got? It holds the calendar up fine
Quite so
He talks in riddles and does his best to confuse me
If he had a brain, the world would be doomed

 

by mutster101
11-29-05
What a fantastic example of plot avoidance
I don't think it's about plot, I think it's about Teh LULZ
Which he's also managed to avoid quite spectacularly

 

by mutster101
11-29-05
I'm bored with this, I'm gonna try and crash one of the other strips
Don't. Remember what happened when you tried to influence the Bonsai Stories. He stopped writing them
You say that like it's a bad thing

 

by mutster101
11-29-05
Hello beautiful
Are you hitting on me?
I'm a penguin, you're a nurse. The very idea is absurd
OK, maybe a little bit. What else is there to do in this place?
Plenty, if the amount of action I've had here is anything to go by

 

by mutster101
11-30-05
Can you say 'Mummy'? Can you? Can you? Mmmmummy
Mmuh... mmuh...
That's right! That's right! Mmmmmummy. Mmmmmummy.
Mmmuh... Mmmuh... Mmmuh...
Minge

 

by mutster101
11-30-05
Mummy's a bit upset. Mummy would be much happier if you said Mummy instead of a bad word. Can you make Mummy happy?
Haaaah... Haaaah...
Oooh! That's good. Hhhhhappy. Hhhhhappy.
Hhhhaaaaa... Hhhhaaaaa...
Whore

 

by mutster101
11-30-05
Now Mummy's starting to get a bit cross. This isn't funny. It's really not. Not funny.
Fuhh... Fuhh...
Oh no you don't! You're not saying that! Say Minge again! Say Whore again!
Fffffuhhhhh... Fffffuhhhhh...
Clitoris

 

by mutster101
11-30-05
Mummy's despairing now. You keep saying bad words
Cuhhh... cuhhh...
Please don't say another bad word
Ccccuuuhhhh... Ccccuuuhhhh...
Cuddle!

 

by mutster101
12-01-05
Hehehehehe I like that new one
I tend to think cheap LULZ are worse than no LULZ at all
You would say that. You are No LULZ personified
Excuse me?
Sorry. Mouseonified

 

by mutster101
12-01-05
Mummy's very pleased! You said a nice word! Can you say another one?
Mmmuhhh... Mmmmuuhhhh...
Mmmmmummy? Dddddaddy?
Dddahhh... Ddddaahhhh...
Boobies

 

by mutster101
12-02-05
I think the butler did it.
On what evidence, mighty Cthulhu?
I researched lots of previous cases. It's always the butler who did it
Mighty Cthulhu, with all due respect, those were trashy works of fiction you were reading. It doesn't work like that in real life.
Still, it's not like we've anything else to go on

 

by mutster101
12-02-05
You're Butler to the deceased?
In a manner of speaking
What's that supposed to mean?
It means that I'm avoiding giving you a direct yes because I don't want to fall victim to some kind of 'the Butler did it' frame
Well, did you do it?
I think if you think about it logically I'm bound to say 'No' regardless of the truth of the matter

 

by mutster101
12-02-05
You're avoiding answering my question
I see no purpose to answering it. You know my answer is going to be 'no' regardless
Do you ever give a straight answer?
It's a bit judgemental of you to apply blanket assumptions based on a minute or so's dialogue
I should have known better than to ask

 

by mutster101
12-02-05
doo doo doo boo boo boo dah dah
doo dee doo dee doo dee doo
dum dum dum dum dum dum dum
muh muh muh muh duh duh duh
huh huh huh huh muh muh muh
felch

 

by mutster101
12-03-05
felch felch felch felch felch felch felch felch
I wish you'd say something else. It's not a very nice word
felch felch felch felch felch felch felch felch
Can you say something else for Mummy? Please?
MOIST!
Well, it's a small improvement

 

by mutster101
12-05-05
Any luck finding food?
No. But there's a penguin that talks and a Nurse that wants us to eat her
What does she think we are, cannibals?
She certainly seems to be hoping as such
Did you find anything else
There are several thousand boxes labelled 'XBox 360' washed up on the southern tip of the island

 

by mutster101
12-05-05
In the marginally innocent school yard
Haven't seen you here before
But then...
Urgh! Cooties!
That was close

 

by mutster101
12-05-05
My colleague tells me you're evading our questions
I tend to disagree. Your questions are mostly rhetorical and are therefore it is you who are evading the truth
You put questions to me that everyone in their right mind would give the same answer to, and thus you invalidate the question and sully the truth
I think I remember you from the Old World

 

by mutster101
12-06-05
It's okay, but there seems to be something lacking
Something to criticise perhaps?
You make me sound like some kind of monster. I do like some of his strips
Name one
Um...
Haha I win!

 

by mutster101
12-08-05
Keep your eyes peeled. There's some kind of invisible monster around
If it's invisible, what good is keeping my eyes peeled going to do? I'm hardly going to spot it
I hadn't thought of that
It could be anywhere. It could be sitting on top of that tree
Keep very very still. Maybe it won't see us
Has it gone yet?

 

by mutster101
12-08-05
Where did you go?
I'm lying in wait for the invisible creature
I believe the technical term is hiding
Oh, suddenly you're an expert on hunting are you?
How can you lie in wait for an invisible creature? How do you know when to jump out?
The plan is a work in progress

 

by mutster101
12-08-05
I think I'm gonna go for a swim
Be careful where you undress
Oh, there's no point, the sand gets everywhere no matter how careful you are
That's not what I meant. In addition to the invisible menace wandering around, Hunter's hiding in the tree
Dang, is there anyone around here who isn't a pervert?
We can hope not

 

by mutster101
12-09-05
You ever noticed how some bands seem to have an unhealthy preoccupation with death?
You mean like Nirvana, Nine Inch Nails, and Marilyn Manson?
Actually I was thinking of A-ha

 

by mutster101
12-10-05
There's I've Been Losing You, The Blood That Moves The Body, Early Morning, Sycamore Leaves, and then the video to Velvet
Four songs and a morbid video do not make an 'unhealthy preoccupation'
It does when you're not expecting it. People expect NIN and the like to sing about death
I still think you're talking nonsense
Later...
Do you have the new A-ha album?

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