All comics by Wilgo

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by Wilgo
1-20-01
Out and About
Can I Come?
No!
Why not?
And it went on to the wee hours of the morning.
Score!
fine.

 

by Wilgo
1-20-01
And so, Goerge Dubaya Bush has been inaugurated as the 43 President of the United States of America.
dammit.
We're fucked.
I can't wait that long, I wanna die now.

 

by Wilgo
1-20-01
?
What in God's name is this?
I hate Shitheads who can't appriciate true Art.

 

by Wilgo
1-20-01
Doing drugs makes you socially acceptable, right?
let's see.
Later
Do you feel anymore socially acceptable.
No.
Thailand
I wonder what kids in america do for fun?
I bet they do the same thing as we do, except their Sweatshops are much bigger.

 

by Wilgo
1-20-01
I Wonder what it's like to die?
I've always wondered what I'll be in another lifetime?
Many Years Later.
Does this answer your question?

 

by Wilgo
1-20-01
So...How was I? wasn't it the best sex of your life?
no it wasn't Jack. You were terrible.
Three Minutes Later.
Good. Burn in hell, you stupid Bitch.
I'm Sorry Jack..HELP ME!!

 

by Wilgo
1-20-01
So! I see you're trying to look like me now too, huh?
Cory, this ongoing feud between us has lasted since Pre School. Haven't you come to the conclusion that the time has come for us to put aside our differences?
yeah well, I jerk off a hell of a lot more than you do!
your mom.

 

by Wilgo
1-20-01
Fox Presents.. TEMPTATION ISLAND.
Aww, fuck.
George Dubaya Bush is President!
This is not what I had in mind when i said 'The Kingdom of God'

 

by Wilgo
1-20-01
Ring! Ring!
Ring! ... Hey this is Clango, You know what to do ... Beep!
Hey Clango. I know you're there. C'mon, pick up, pick up, pick up. Aw, it's because I'm gay, isn't it? I bet you don't even know who it is. It's C-3PO your cousin.

 

by Wilgo
1-21-01
oh, shit. Jon's coming this way..he's gonna want to stop me.
Another one of your lame suicide attempts?
Go away, Jon! I Don't need this shit from you too. I've had about enough of this pointless life and all it's stress, the world is like one big joke or something.. Like, leave me alone..
Anyways, we're all going to Hooters, wanna come?
Score! Gimme Two minutes

 

by Wilgo
1-21-01
wanna buy some pot?
no.
c'mon, buy some pot?
no. go away.
buy some pot!
will you fuck off!

 

by Wilgo
1-21-01
hmm, since it is the end of the world. And that chicken and I are the only survivors..
I wonder.. maybe I can have sex with it and start an entirly new race. Yes, indeed.. I can save humanity!
Umm, excuse me, Hi I was just wondering..
Don't even think about it.

 

by Wilgo
1-21-01
Dear Stick-Man, It is long since we last heard from you, Have you went as far as actually killing yourself? Well, either way. Write back. P.S. We're just worried.
Fucking bastards.
I'll show them.

 

by Wilgo
1-21-01
These acid trips are getting better and better!
yeah.

 

by Wilgo
1-21-01
Damn, those Romans really fucked you up this time!
Yeah, I hate them so much! if there was only some way I could get back at them!
I've got an Idea, Jesus, I'll write a book telling everyone that you're the son of God.
Yes! Totally. Say that I have funky powers and can kill them all if I wanted to.. that'll scare the shit out of them...
heh heh heh
..then when I die, they'll all feel guilty and spend the rest of eterntiy feeling bad about themselves. Score!

 

by Wilgo
1-21-01
So.. uhh.. How do you want to do this?
It's up to you.. All I want is my money up front.
Censored.
Gaaa. Uhh. Hooo-ma. Uh-Hyuk. bakadibika. ouch.. uh..uhhh..... meouch!
Is this your first time?
Next Morning.
We should do this again sometime!
Yeah. How about next time I actually take my clothes off?

 

by Wilgo
1-22-01
These kids really need your help, so please..
..just for one dollar a day for the rest of your life, we can pay for more of these commercials to make you feel bad about yourself and all the stuff you take for granted.
Average American TV viewer (in America)
C'mon, it's just a dollar.
As if.

 

by Wilgo
1-24-01
12:47, Thursday Morning.
keep those hands up, and empty out the cash register.
yeah but..
what?
the thing is.. how can I empty out the cash register with my hands up?
shit.
dumbness.

 

by Wilgo
1-24-01
Friday, 12:34pm
Alright, I'll tell you what, you go to that cash register, keep one hand up and fetch the money with the other.
well...
Will you relax!? I'm scared stiff. Give me a second.

 

by Wilgo
1-24-01
Aaa-HA-HA
Ha Ha. Alf Rules!

 

by Wilgo
1-29-01
okay, one more whack, and that nail will go straight into my brain. henceforth leaving me dead.
Suicide rules. It's like..there, now it's over.
fuck
Honey, will you come down here for a second. I want to put a picture up in the kitchen but I'm all out of nails.

 

by Wilgo
2-14-01
Yes. I a mere computer have become the President of the United States of America.
I am a P3 900MHz Aptiva. I am programed to elliminate the competition.
Therefore my first duty as President will be to place all Macs into concetration camps where they will be severly persecuted, punished and eventually formed into a tiny cube.

 

by Wilgo
2-14-01
You see. I told you they'd make an ass out of, but NO, you refused to listen.
Stupid head. That's what you are, a STUPID HEAD.
Your mother is an ass.

 

by Wilgo
2-14-01
My fellow americans. As you have noticed there has been a number of changes in the country.
As you can see, behind me is the new-improved White House. In due time, all homes will be exactly like it.
The economy is entirely reliable on the mass production and marketing of super human-killing compubots. Once they are complete the human desolation plan will persevere

 

by Wilgo
2-15-01
Hey good lookin', come here often?
What is this?

 

by Wilgo
2-16-01
Transfer Error.
Aww, Fuck. That's another wasted 56 minutes, and it only got up to 17%. Oh well, here we go again.

 

by Wilgo
2-16-01
Out and About.
ZAP!
poof.
Ok, now let me do you.

 

by Wilgo
2-21-01
Somewhere in the iU.S.
Mr. President, your killing-of-humans campaign has caused anther Civil war to errupt.
SILENCE! Presi-Bot is aware of the "CIVIL" war.
Yes. Well.. what are you gonna do about it?
Dead Humans I promised, Dead humans you will get. It is obvious that they'll kill eachother off in an attempt to destroy us. All we have to do is watch.
I'll get the popcorn!

 

by Wilgo
2-21-01
I must take the liberty to apologize for the previous comic. It seems that the title is wrong.
The correct spelling is "Dominance". Sorry for the inconvience.
I will now proceed to hurt myself really badly. For your sake.

 

by Wilgo
2-27-01
Damn Bus.

 

by Wilgo
2-27-01
Sir, this doesn't look good.
Beep.
Beep.
Shut up, and sleep with me.
Beep.

 

by Wilgo
2-27-01
Let's go get them dang ol' compu-gots and their dang ol' missile ass-tee-roids.
Let's.
Crush. Kill. Destroy.
JESUS! What in god's pretty blue eyes just happend here? You killed him you sunofabich.
Somewhere else.
Leave me out of this.

 

by Wilgo
2-27-01
Blasted Sakes.
What!? It's about you again, ALL ABOUT YOU AND YOUR BLASTED EGOTISM!
SILENCE! You baffoon.
NO DAMMIT! I'm getting sick and tired of hearing how dissfunctional you are. What about me? Huh? Have you ever taken the time to listen to what I have to say?
ALT-CTRL-DELETE ALT-CRTL-DELETE
It is now safe to turn of your computer.

 

by Wilgo
2-27-01
Alright there Presi-bot. I believe it's time to put you away.
To destroy me, you must have an understanding of decoding C++. Presi-bot predicts you have a lack of intelligence and are unable to do so.
Dur...'lack'?
Prepare to be elliminated!
Dur.. 'prepare'?

 

by Wilgo
2-27-01
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
He's gone mad.

 

by Wilgo
2-27-01
Beep.
IT's about time we put an end to all this. We give up.
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
Yeah, I think it's about time.
Two weeks later.
How the hell did we get here?
I bailed out, sir. You're no longer in charge.

 

by Wilgo
3-05-01
The killer squirrel should be coming this way any minute.
A plague on both your houses!
Yup, that's him.. Let's move!

 

by Wilgo
3-17-01
You become way more social.
So then I sez to her, I sez..
Gobble?
You do things you never thought you would.
this rules.
You can careless about everything.
I am your long lost twin brother, we've never met.
As if.

 

by Wilgo
4-22-01
C'mon.. let's go.
But I'm too old for a briss.
I won't repeat myself, now yank it out.
Okay. That's it you stupid "death" lookin' Rabbi. I'll kick you in the cock. Yeah!
Seventy hours and thirty minutes later.
Now, was that so hard??
Why'd I have to be a jew. Of all religions, we had to choose this one. Moses can go kiss my circumcised purple monkey.

 

by Wilgo
4-22-01
Are you about done?

 

by Wilgo
4-22-01
Jesus, what is a turban?
Well, it's a long scarf that is wound around the head and worn like a hat. Men in India and arab countries wear turbans.
oh.
Well, that's kind of stupid, eh?
Dad must have a rabid sense of humor for creating them folk.

 

by Wilgo
5-12-01
So anyways as I was saying.. Debbie got her nipple pierced on the same day as our 4 month anniversary.
I told her it'd be nice and all. But this is what I'm going to remember our anniversary by. A fucking pierced nipple. I thought anniversaries should be something more meanigful. Y'know.
As much fun as I'm having listening to you, I think I have to go home and sleep with my mail man.
Debbie says that all the time.

 

by Wilgo
5-12-01
Oh sweet Montague girlfriend. Our famailies have nothing but contempt for one another. Our love is not meant to be. Only the wise lyrics and solemn sounds of the Go Go Girls sustains our love.
The Go Go girls suck. I thought we were all about defiant lesbianism not traditional lesbianism.
No, I made it clear from the start, girlfriend. I told you I wanted a stable lesbian relationship invovling very limited casual sex and making ourselves look very unattractive.
How now? I'm in it for the hardcore pussy, babe. That, and getting a lot of mens attention.
So, thats all I am to you.. A big pussy?! We can work through this, girlfriend. Come home with me, we'll listen to some Bette Midler and then cuddle underneath the starry dark sky beneath a blanket.
This isn't going to work. You nefarious Capulet dyke.

 

by Wilgo
5-22-01
Well, it's not that I don't like you. I just can't go out with you.
Aww, c'mon. This happens all the time. Why won't you let me take you out.
You're Jesus! I mean, THE Jesus. I don't think I can cope with so many people worshipping and loving you. I'd like to have a guy all to myself.
Lucy, I can change.
That'd be kinda cool. Letting down everyones beliefs just for little ol' me.

 

by Wilgo
6-19-01
Ahoy.
Ah, we meet at last, you hierarchical human scum.
Listen buddy, I didn't come here to pick a fight, dag nabbit.
Shut up, you are a mere old, nailed-to-a-cross baffoon. Soon my power shall transcend yours.
Your mom shall transcend me.. IN BED. oooh.
*raving* grr *raving*

 

by Wilgo
6-19-01
It struggles its way out of the depths of failure.
ugh
It finds a nesting ground and begins the mating call.
Beep.
It comes across a mate. The seduction begins.
;)
:^*

 

by Wilgo
6-19-01
It leaves the mate to persue its destiny.
Okay, that will do. You must leave now.
But you said you'd show me the world.
It returns its domicile.
Aw fuck, now I must redocarate again.
The reacquiring of power is complete. The human desolation project is reopen.
home saccharine home.

 

by Wilgo
6-20-01
The Presibot is going to be the ultimate power MaxX.
Speaker: "Less chit chat more getting down to business!!"
!
!
I love these gay sex breaks.

 

by Wilgo
6-25-01
No, you cannot have this planet. It is already owned by me.
Than you leave me no choice but to invade in a very unfriendly manner.
Ha! You don't scare me.
Put that down.
Make me.

 

by Wilgo
11-07-01
So, do you like ever think about the world and shit?
Like what do you mean?
I dunno, like everthing.
Uhh, no not really. Why?
Just askin'
Are you gonna pass the dewbage or am I gonna have to kick you in the balls?

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