All comics by ralahinn1

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by ralahinn1
6-12-17
Stand by for Actin News-
This just in, ralahinn1 wishes to make a statement -
We sent a team out-
I apologise that Brian Frosh is attorney general in my state .

 

by ralahinn1
6-12-17
What's this about?
I represent the group formally known as criminals and illegals, because President Trump's travel ban is continued to be blocked, and SWJ's work for undocumented aliens, you have to share "your" stuff-
Hell no!

 

I say,Percy,did you know that beginning tomorrow Snap Chat will run ads telling the "benefits" of working at McDonalds?
Another good reason not to use Snap Chat.
by ralahinn1, 6-12-17

 

by ralahinn1
6-13-17
I was doing housework, and I heard the song"Be a clown"playing on tv-
Get ready America,for what we call the Session with Session. Enjoy the comic stylings of former SNL cast member, Al Frankin, and special surprise guests-
Hell no!
And-clowns,clowns-
Russian conspiracy!
Russian conspiracy!
clowns!
Don't forget Nancy!
That mean man,Trump, scares me!

 

I just heard the FBI now has possession of Comey's notes-
Surely you don't need the lovely one I put on the icebox?
Yes, that one too, mame,sorry. Nice crayon work, I admit, but it's government property.
by ralahinn1, 6-13-17

 

by ralahinn1
6-13-17
-and now, a message from Anonymous-
Yay!Here-here!
A number of years ago, we stole some ideas from comic books and movies, and Anonymous was born -
Tell it, brother!
-we crawled up out of our parent's basements,leaving 4Chan and You tube for a time, to pretend we were SWJ's with sense-I have an important message for you now-
Yay!
What are you doing inside? It's a nice day. Go give someone a hug, tell them you love them. With these few simple acts, you do more for yourselves and the world than us^_^.

 

by ralahinn1
6-13-17
Honey, what are you doing? Come to bed.
Can't. Waiting to see who will be the first on You tube to call the London fire a "false flag" or part of a Ramadan event.

 

Hmmmmm
Anyone ever notice that most of these "active shooters", if not"Isis inspired", or"disgruntled former employees"are firmly on the "left"?
by ralahinn1, 6-14-17

 

I say,Percy, some people are saying that the big London fire was caused by an "anti-immigrant"group.
Really? Hearing how these"immigrants" behave, someone may have fallen asleep while smoking weed, or they say it was a conspiracy because they all want to become rich. Sometimes accidents happen.
by ralahinn1, 6-15-17

 

I say,Percy, did you hear a man in Florida got arrested after fighting with his mother over a cheeseburger?
Really, must have been a damn good cheeseburger,or alcohol.
by ralahinn1, 6-15-17

 

I say,Percy,did you hear that Face Book says it can now remove "suspicious" posts without human intervention?
1)Whelp, good bye white Christian Republicans. 2)Humans work at Face Book?
by ralahinn1, 6-16-17

 

Walking Dead, the otherside-
Want anything special tonight dear?
I been eating too much junk food lately, lets lay off politicians for a while. I know what, lets go out for Mexican.
by ralahinn1, 6-16-17

 

I say, Percy, did you hear that there are experiments where they put armor on bull sperm and fit it with a guidance system, and put it in a woman's vagina to transport cancer fighting drugs?
Holy beastiality, Batman!
by ralahinn1, 6-17-17

 

It says here that if you subscribe to this magazine at this "super low"price,they will automatically renew you at the same price when the subscription ends.
We will use this letter, to start a fire in the fireplace.
by ralahinn1, 6-17-17

 

Hmmmmm-
Do you ever notice that everyone who goes looking for ghosts,big foot or UFO's runs like a b!tch if they see something, and you just don't know what?
by ralahinn1, 6-17-17

 

Man, the water quality has changed here since they built that new resort.
I love it! The colors, the colors!
by ralahinn1, 6-17-17

 

Bill Cosby! What are you doing here?
Hickory dickory dock, the jury is deadlocked! Benadryl shooters for everyone!
by ralahinn1, 6-17-17

 

by ralahinn1
6-17-17
AEEEY what's goin'on?
They say RCLG might binge comic again any time now-
Go,go,go!
Go,go,go!
No.My eyes!
You don't have to stay- I don't know about you, but I'm going back to doing what we were doing which would explain why we weren't here most of today...

 

by ralahinn1
6-17-17
I say, Percy,did you hear that Olympic gold medal winner, Michael Phelps, will be racing a Great white shark for Discovery channel's"Shark Week"?
Why?
Then after that, I'd like to go out for brewskies.
Not cool, forcing one of nature's beautiful creatures to perform for man's amusement...oh,and I am concerned for the shark,too...I guess.

 

I didn't know Miley was on tour.
by ralahinn1, 6-17-17

 

by ralahinn1
6-18-17
Stand by for Actin News-
This just in-a very confusing day in Baltimore as it celebrates both gay pride events and Father's Day -
We sent a crew out for interviews-
Do I have to?

 

Some time in the near future-
Hi, may I take your order?
Like hell, you already took my job!
by ralahinn1, 6-20-17

 

I say, Percy, did you hear Eric Holder is considering to run for president in 2020?
Really? He actually should be in jail.
by ralahinn1, 6-20-17

 

by ralahinn1
6-21-17
and now a word from our sponsor -
Good evening. Here at the "Happy Barn", we provide employment and social opportunities for the elderly, and those with mental or physical disabilities -
All we ask is that you donate so we can continue our work.
You do this for a"donation",huh? How do the people who donate know if the money actually goes to the people you say you help,and don't some people just want to be left alone?
We have candy-
What are we standin' around for?!

 

by ralahinn1
6-21-17
And now a word from our sponsor -
Yo, you know me, an'where my bidness be. Well, it's officially summer-
Now,get to steppin' an'come on in fo' our "Summer of 69" special- we prolly got what you want-an'wid weed bein' legal in many places, sex-bots, an'the possibility of disclosure, my bidness be smokin'!

 

by ralahinn1
6-22-17
And now, a message from Anonymous-
Greetings, world. For over ten years we have tried to impress you with our mad script kiddie skillz and showing up like Santa at social justice events-
In more recent times, some people saying they are Anonymous have made videos on such new age subjects as "indigo children"and "alien disclosure", but who knows if they are considered Anonymous anymore
Whelp, maybe it's time to go "where everybody knows my name"-then maybe after a few beers, I'll make a video...

 

You know you are an adult when you see that someone "discovered" a "new" animal and instead of admiring it, you wonder how it tastes o_O
by ralahinn1, 6-22-17

 

Recently in England-
Arrgh, I am Cap'n Jack Sparrow, an'I wants ta do bodily harm ta the president-
No, you are not Jack Sparrow, lay off the rum, Mr.Depp, or the weed...
by ralahinn1, 6-23-17

 

Washington,DC is going to offer a "gender neutral"driver's license.
"Gender neutral" driver'slicense? Faabulous!
by ralahinn1, 6-23-17

 

I say,Percy, did you hear that a lot of clients at online dating serviced are now making their decisions on a person based on if they voted for Donald Trump or not?
Really? I would be more worried about those that voted for Hillery.
by ralahinn1, 6-27-17

 

by ralahinn1
6-27-17
Stand by for Actin News-
This just in- Facebook is claiming over 2 billion active users-
Guess that's 2 billion served. We sent a team out to interview a local doctor -
With that many people active on Facebook is there any problem?
Not for Zuckerburg.

 

I say, Percy, did you hear someone has made a shoe you can convert from flats to heels?
Really? I smell lawsuits.
by ralahinn1, 6-28-17

 

by ralahinn1
6-29-17
And now, a word from our sponsor -
Hi, you know me as a "world known finacial adviser",but sometimes, I try other things as well-
Do you have an idea for a "new"invention? Well, you can submit it to me,and pay me to tell you how bad it really is-
Six months later, our team will put a product like it on the market,and if you sue, we can show at least three ways it's different. And because I have more money, I win. Trust me.

 

by ralahinn1
6-29-17
And now, a message for our Islamic friends-
Hello, my baby-
hello, my honey-
hello, my ragtime gal!

 

by ralahinn1
6-29-17
And now, a message from the Maryland Dept. of Tourism-
It's summer- are you looking for a vacation to remember?
Come visit Baltimore-if you're white, chances are you'll only be robbed-
Yo, mama,you lookin fo' work?
Baltimore- for some, it's to die for-
You too can sample the interesting night life, just know where your atm card is-
Why you sittin' here, pretty white lady? Come have some "Purple drank" wid me. I doan bite...much.

 

by ralahinn1
7-02-17
Honey, come to bed,it's late.
Can't, watching a video on youtube, and can't tell if it's from Anonymous, or a Todd Starnes commentary.

 

by ralahinn1
7-03-17
And now, a message from the president -
I'd like to wish everyone a happy, and safe, July 4th.
Yeah, and like I said last year,don't blow your f*king hands off!
Bobby!

 

Did you know that Anonymous just made a video saying there are close to 100 "alien"species on earth?
You have to remember most of Anonymous is under 35, and a lot of posting must happen after a weedfest. Also, if this isn't Anonymous,they should rein them in like Luz Boat.
by ralahinn1, 7-04-17

 

Timmy's questions-
Do you think most of the dinosaurs died out because of a "reptile disfunction"? I heard something on the radio about it.
by ralahinn1, 7-05-17

 

Downstairs-
Hey, wanna do something fun? That paranormal dude is getting ready to post another video on you tube. He thinks he's talking to "human" ghosts. Wanna mess with him?
Sure, count me in.
by ralahinn1, 7-05-17

 

by ralahinn1
7-06-17
I got an idea with all the "snowflakes" and "political correctness" Halloween may be rough this year-
No way you can keep this place open, man. It's cultural misappropriation!
Spook lives matter!
Blah, close it down!
You should pay us for stealing our heritage!
I'm Nancy Pelosi, and I am injecting myself in this, to show I'm senile.

 

This is CNN
by ralahinn1, 7-06-17

 

Team Baltimore, murders are almost at one a day-we know y'all can do better- keep going for the gold!
by ralahinn1, 7-06-17

 

by ralahinn1
7-06-17
Stand by for Actin News-
This just in- it's getting bad in Maryland folks, one fireman is accusing another fireman of assault -
Join us for an Actin News recreation of the event-
Did not, you big sissy.
Ossiffer, that fireman assaulted me-
Ah,ok...donut?

 

by ralahinn1
7-06-17
And now a word from our sponsor -
Hey, y'all, I am Walt Dizley, and I am opening an amusement park.Not like the one run by the other Walt, I'm more like Walter White. Let me tell y'all about it-
It's called"Safe Spaces". Here, Snowflakes and BLM can "protest" the whole day, and recruiters can come and pay them to go on rl protests. Now don't that sound fun?
Don't hose me, man!
Come on down, we'll leave a light on for you.
It's because I'm "black", right?

 

Good evening, what can I do for you?
You know the company that makes those big black trash bags? I saw a bag on a street corner, and it looked like one of the women of my homeland. Can they be sued for "culture misappropriation"?
by ralahinn1, 7-06-17

 

And now a word from our sponsor -
Aiiyaiyai, Meester Trump, I am still waitin' for you to contact me about building the wall. I guess it's because you haven't found my beest tunnels yet, the people in my homeland say they are legend.
by ralahinn1, 7-07-17

 

by ralahinn1
7-07-17
You Tube, in the middle of the night-
Hi,Youtubers, I am Steve, and I talk to ghosts,including dead celebs and inventers-
Whoooooooo
Wait-was that a ghost?! Who's touching me?!
Downstairs-
Bahahaha, he keeps this up, he'll open a portal-
Weed and mental illness must be rough on humans, but this is some funny shiz!

 

We go through over 50 years of how we want "Whitey" to see us, an' JAY-Z goes an' makes a video called"The Story of O.J."SMH.
Word.
by ralahinn1, 7-07-17

 

by ralahinn1
7-08-17
And now-a message from Anonymous-
Greetings,World. First I would like to appologize to you for the times I sit in my parent's basement and get preachy while drinking sherry.
I know it's summer, and "ain't nobody got time fo dat", and you'd rather hear tales of daring as you sit by your pools.
I really can't tell you any more alien disclosure stories right now, because my mom makes me turn off the radio at 10, so no more "Coast to coast am" for a while. Anyhoo, enjoy summer.

Showing page 12.

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