All comics by AndTeenAngstForAll

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We will not act angsty until or demands are met.
More free bagel bites, time for masturbation and teen movies with generic rock soundtracks.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-13-07

 

How do you feel about the recent Oil spill in the San Francisco Bay, Mr. Oilcompanyceo.
I am outraged by these events.
Wow, so you really care about the damage that has been done to the environment?
Environment? Fuck that shit. I'm talking about all the wasted Oil.

 

You wanted to see me?
Yes, Officer Owens. I have the DNA Test results from the Sperm.
Oh yeah? What did you find out?
Cut the crap. I know it was you who jizzed in my Sandwich, Asshole.

 

Alright, I got the stuff. You just show me where the homeless shelter is.
Thanks for doing this, again... Wait, are those… panties?
Yes, I think they rather clearly are.
The supplies for the homeless shelter you were talking about getting were panties? I don’t think we homeless need panties.
Listen, Homeless Homer. I think if you knew what the homeless needed you wouldn’t be homeless. Now come on, let’s go give these panties to some hot homeless women.
Ugh, find your own way to the homeless shelter, you perverted bastard.

 

Unconstitutional means “Bad”
Man, that Pizza was unconstitutional.
Seriously, dude., that pizza was gross.
That test was so hard. I bet I did really unconstitutional on it.
Yeah, me too. I bet I got an F.

 

The Civil Rights movement isn't over until Teen Movies stop having the Token Black Guy.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-16-07

 

No, I've never wondered if I had Schizophrenia. Why do you ask, weird-blue-man-sitting-nex-to-me?
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-16-07

 

I'm pretty sure that Sara meant American Country when she said the theme of the party was 'country'. Ya know, like cowboys? Not like the Bedouin tribal stuff in the Arab countryside.
Oh, really? Goddamnit!
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-17-07

 

So Dad won't let me go out with her because she's from the Appleoperatingsystem Family.
They are the sworn enemy of our family, the Microsoftwindows. But at least she's not from the Linux family.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-18-07

 

You know all those Teenagers who cut themselves because they're so depressed, or whatever?
Yeah, I guess. Why do you ask?
Instead of cutting themselves, why don't they just get a shitty job like us?
Yeah, this is masochistic enough.

 

Did you hear about the list?
Yes, I did. This is terrible news.
How is it bad? The city is no longer one of the 25 Most Dangerous Places in America.
Yeah, but the city was at least known for that. Now no one will ever think of us. I mean, we're not going to get on a top 25 lists for anything good.
You're a fucked up Mayor.

 

Ya know, just because you put circles around the A and E on your American Eagle clothes doesn't mean that they weren't made in a Sweatshop. And it doesn't make you an "Eco-Anarchist."
):
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-20-07

 

So, I just discovered that it turns out the master race is really the Berbers.
:(
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-20-07

 

I just noticed... The abbreviation for the Public Broadcasting Service, PBS, is really close to the word 'Pubes.'
Um, okay?
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-21-07

 

Happy Thanksgiving!
Thanks for having me.
So, I thought to celebrate the holiday more festively, we should all take Indian names.
What? Fine, I'll be Gandhi Khan.
No, silly! I mean like, okay, I'll be Sparkling River! Now, you pick one!
How 'bout Fighting Stereotypes.

 

No, it isn't called "Black Friday" because it is 'Black People's Thanksgiving.'
Oh, then why is it right after Thanksgiving?
I don't know the etymology and you're a Fuck-Ass.

 

My daughter has been actin' funny lately. She's been sayin a lot of bad words and stuff. I think she might have the Tourette's. Do you mind taking a look at her?
Not a problem. Bring her into the Examination Room.
Cunt!
Alright! I think I that is enough. Let's go back to my Office to see your Mother.
So, does she have the Tourette's?
No, she's just a Bitch. I'd say try better parenting. Pay me, now!

 

This is awkward.
I'll say. I never liked this Cartoon.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-25-07

 

Hey, do you happen to have the time?
Yeah. Let's see, it is five after Seven.
Thanks. That's a pretty cool watch ya got there.
Oh, thanks. Yeah, it's one of them Suicide Watches.

 

What do you call a Hippie who is self-degrading?
Uh, I dunno. What?
Biodegradable!
):

 

Now that it is after Thanksgiving, the Shopping Season has started. It is almost Christmas time, the most depressing time of the year. That's it... I'm going to kill myself!
Oh, Ho!, Ho!, Ho!. Don't be depressed. This is the most wonderful time of the year. Think on the bright side, kid!
Well, I may not have many friends... but at least I won't have to buy many presents!
Not exactly what I was talkin' 'bout, but close enough, I guess.

 

Come on, Billy. I have to take you to the Mall to get new clothes.
Why do I need new clothes, Mom?
Well, now that you're a Teenager, I have to get you your mandatory Ramones t-shirt.
Oh, they're my favorite Brand Name!

 

So, how do you get your comic to be that random comic that shows up for people to read on Stripcreator's front page?
Sell out.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-28-07

 

He's on the phone...
No, Asiangirl1, I'm way more obsessed with you!
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-28-07

 

I want you so bad and I don't know why, Steve.
It's because I'm an Afro-disiac, baby.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 11-29-07

 

You know how Scene Kids like Dinosaurs, right?
Yeah.
Do you think that over time they'll evolve into liking Birds?
Probably, my Grandma likes Birds. And she was a Flapper, the Scene Girl of the 1920s!

 

Hey, folks. I'm Evel Knievel. Ya might know me from my famous motorcycle jumps, like the Snake River Cayon Jump in 1971.
Also, I died today. :(

 

Thank You for shopping at Office Master. Did you find everything you needed today, and are you a member of the Pen-15 club?
What is the Pen-15 Club?
It's the company rewards progam. Everytime you buy fifteen dollars worth of office supplies, you get a free twelve pack of Bic Pens.
How do I sign up?
Just give me your name and phone number and let me write down PEN15 on your hand.
Sign me up! Which hand do you need?

 

Are you ready to sex, baby?
Well, yeah, but... I was hopin' we could spice it up tonight.
How so?
I have the outfits in the other room. Let's put them on and hurry back and 'play'.
What the hell am I supposed to be? And what the fuck are you?
I'm an IRS Agent and you're a rich, money-lovin', tax-evading Corporate Executive who's willin' to do anything to keep from having to pay taxes.

 

Man, Joe, ever since the divorce you've really let yourself go. Look at how long your beard has got.
You think this is bad? You should see my pubic hair!
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-02-07

 

Hey, Ben, where are you going all secretive with that Suitcase.
Um, I have to take of some serious business.
Now to take care of my business.

 

Santa Visits The Illegal Sex Trade In The South Pacific
Ho! Ho! Ho! You've been a very naughty girl! If you wanna get any presents you'll have to suck on Santa's Candy Cane!
):
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-04-07

 

Hey, wanna go worship Satan?
Nah.
Aw, why not? Are you a Christian or just a coward?
I'm neither. I just personally don't believe in fictious Bible characters. Also, if I wanted to worship "EVIL" I'd worship humanity. Just look at all the shit Humans have done.

 

Hi, my name is Drew. And I'm a Workaholic.
Hi, Drew.
I guess I learned it from my father. He would take me with him to the Office on the weekends. Pretty soon I was drinkin' with him, Coffee that is. By the age of eight I had my own Coffee Mug.
Today, it's pretty bad. Sometimes I wake-up and find myself in Office Supplies Stores and have no idea how I got there.

 

If I'm ever in a Crust Punk Band I want the Band's name to be The Boxcar Kids.
You'd name your Band after a Children's Mystery Book Series?
Yeah. But, ya know, 'Boxcar' makes it seem like Train hoppin'. And 'Kids' makes it seem like 'We Are The Youth' and that we're Orphans.
So are the guys in the Band gonna be called Frank and Joe Hardy, or something? And if you have a girl is she gonna be go by Nancy Drew?
Dude, that's just gimmicky.
You're the one wanting to have a Band named after a Children's Mystery Series!

 

Globalization is a weird thing. I'd've never guessed a game/toy like the Rubik's Cube, invented by a Hungarian would be mass-produced in China and sold to American Kids.
Actually, it's not made in China.
What? It says it's made in China on the package.
Well, it's made in the States, but when they make them the colors are all mixed up. So they gotta outsource the labor to China because they're the only people who can solve the Rubik's Cubes.
Not only is that racist but its economically wrong.
):

 

Are you the Tooth Fariy!?!
No, I'm the You're-Gonna-Grow-Up-To-Be-Ugly Fairy.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-08-07

 

Go back to England, you dirty Teaback.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-09-07

 

Hey! Drinkin' coffee, huh?
Oh, yeah!
Bet I can drink more than you!
You're on!

 

I'm so fuckin' horny!
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-11-07

 

I've never felt so alone in my life.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-11-07

 

Do you think if we, the so called 'South', had won the War the immigration issue in North America today would be about people trying to leave the CSA to sneak into the USA?
Instead of all the people from 'Latin America' tryin' to illegally immigrate? Perhaps.
What do you think their ethnic slurs for us would be? Cornbread Heads?
I'm gonna go with Grit Backs.

 

To the KING CEO of this Tower of Capitalism:
I declare WAR on your Feudal Cubical Kingdom.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-13-07

 

Those who can't do, blog.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-13-07

 

Good Mornin' and welcome to Mistress Dan's Erotic Bakery. What can I get for ya today?
I'd like a Boobgle, please.
Would you like me to give that a Bukkake of Cream Cheese?
Yes, please!

 

Wanna go molest kids?
Uh, I dunno.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-15-07

 

What is a Politican's favorite fruit?
I dunno, what?
Impeach!

 

BRRAK!
Barack!
Barack Obama for President.

 

Today at work I discovered, that no matter what I'll never be happy so I shoul just take joy in how much I have everything.
by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-17-07

 

Hey, Jim, how have you been? I haven't seen you in awhile. How's the girlfriend?
She's mad at me right now, actully.
Why? What happened?
I tried to get her to let me take naked pictures of her on my digital camera.
Dude, what the hell. You can't do that. You gotta use a Polaroid Camera to take nude pictures of her. It's older and classier. That means it's more romantic. She'll be okay with nude pics then.
Oh, okay.

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