All comics by Benco

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by Benco
12-29-01
PLAYING MONSTER RANCHER
EXCEPT INSTEAD OF A MONSTER I CHOSE TO TRAIN A SEXY SEXY BREAST WOMAN
I DONT REMEMBER THE PIXIES'S'S BREASTS JIGGLING QUITE THIS MUCH IN THE MONSTER RANCHER FOR PSX
THIS IS A GREAT IMPROVEMENT
tf? this pussy can't PUSH THE BIG ROCK
FUCKING BITCH IS ASKING FOR A DICK-WHIPPING
WHERE IS THE "SLAP AROUND WITH PENIS" OPTION

 

by Benco
12-29-01
KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR THE TWIST ENDING
I WAS AT THE LIBRARY TODAY WHEN THIS OLD GUY COMES UP TO THE COUNTER AND SAYS
"YOU GOT ANY PLAYBOYS???"
TO THE OLD LADY LIBRARIAN AND SHE'S ALL SHOCKED AND APALLED
IN AN UNRELATED INCIDENT, I SHELVED A BOOK ENTITLED "HOW TO GIVE HER ABSOLUTE PLEASURE" TODAY, THAT HAD PICTURES!!!
I AM LEAVING I HATE YOU ALL YOU FUCKING BASTARDS

 

by Benco
12-29-01
OH DEAR SWEET INDIVIDUALLY WRAPPED MRS FIELDS MILK CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE THANK YOU FOR BEING SO GOOD
LEISURETOWN LIES - LIBRARIES DO NOT CARRY BACK ISSUES OF PLAYBOY ON MICROFICHE

 

by Benco
12-30-01
sexual intercourse n. Coitus between humans. Sexual union between humans involving genital contact other than vaginal penetration by the penis.
..SO WAIT IF LESBIANS GET IT ON THAT'S NOT SEX?
THEN WHAT IS IT? "JUMPING AROUND"!?
SO IF TWO JEWISH LESBIANS GET IT ON, IT'S NOT SEX?

 

by Benco
1-01-02
DON'T FEEL BAD NIMBY YOU'RE BETTER THAN GARFIELD
...EVERYTHINGS BETTER THAN GARFIELD
Except cheese.
....then there was silence.

 

by Benco
1-01-02
DEVIATING FROM THE SUBJECT, I GOT JACKED OFF BY A HOT TUB TO ORGASM ON FRIDAY
SONIC HENTAI
YOU SEE I WAS GETTING A PENIS MASSAGE BY VARIOUS CELEBRITIES AND MY COCK SLIPPED OUT OF MY UNDERWEAR
DID I JUST HEAR SONIC HENTAI
...AND THEN I SHOT HER!

 

by Benco
1-01-02
no lamserv gave me gay little boy porn once !
HELLO!!
HLELO
WOULD YOU LIKE SOMKE MORE BOYS!?!?!?
DCC session closed
I HATE YOU

 

by Benco
1-01-02
I WOULD LIKE SOME MORE BOYS JUST FUCKIN SEND THEM
ACTUALLY I WOULD NOT
THAT ONE BOY SHOCKED ME ENOUGH
AND HE WAS QUITE OLD TOO!
ALTHOUGH IF I HAD A PENIS I WOULD NOT OBJECT TO RUBBING IT ALL OVER HIS SUPPLE BODY

 

by Benco
1-01-02
I CAME ON TO TELL YOU GUYS THERE IS A BOY MEETS WORLD MARATHON ON
OH GOD
WHICH IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN LIVING
:O what channel
ZOOOOOOG DISNEY
that plus MONSTER RANCHER plus SOME TEA should equal an HOUR-LONG ORGASM FOR ME

 

by Benco
1-01-02
guess who gets to touch breasts daily? IT'S ME.
god just imagine, jojo your life
you wake up in the morning. BREASTS
you eat some lunch. BREASTS.
RIPE, FIRM AND WAITING TO BE TOUCHED
I WOULD LOVE THAT! OH WAIT.....

 

by Benco
1-04-02
WHAT COCK I DONT SEE IT
YOU LIE
I SEE COCKS, BUT NO DICKS, IN THE Z2.
I JUST POSTED MORE DICKS
what cocks post?
SHUT UP ABOUT THE COCKS

 

by Benco
1-04-02
ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN LEARN C?
RIGHT HERE! *pionts at crotch*
C DEEZ NUTZ BITCH!
* Benco thrusts his hips suggestivly foward *
HEY GUESS WHAT
CHICKEN BUTT

 

by Benco
1-04-02
WHEN I WAS LIKE SEVEN I SAW A CAR GET RUN OVER BY A CAR
MY FIRST CAR ACCIDENT WITNESSING
AND/OR MONSTER TRUCK RALLY

 

by Benco
1-04-02
*** Sneakers has joined #misanthropy
SNEAKERS
HI SNEAKERS
HEY SNEAKERS
hiya
SHUT UP, SNEAKERS

 

by Benco
1-04-02
WHAT IS WITH YOU FOOLS AND SNEAKERS "SNEAKERS THIS! SNEAKERS THAT!"
WELL LET ME TELL YOU I CAN SEE RIGHT PAST HIS AND OR HER WARM, WELCOMING EXTERIOR
STRAIGHT INTO THE EVIL, COLD FILLING
GAY NIGGERS FROM OUTER SPACE
WHO IS SNEAKERS ANYHOW?
ALL I KNOW IS THAT YOU ALL SEEM TO LOVE HIM/HER SO I'M FORCED TO TELL THEM TO SHUT UP WHENEVER THEY TALK

 

by Benco
1-06-02
OH ABBY TRAVIS, UP YOURS I DONT WANT TO SEE YOUR GAY BAND ANYWAYS
HELLO I HAVE BIG BOO-OOBS, WE'RE GLAD YOU CAME ON BY!
LOOK AT MY NURSE OUTFIT! WATCH YO STEP OR YOU MIGHT TRI-IIIP ON MY BREASTS
WE'RE GLAD I'VE GOT BIG BREAAAASTS
"HALF PRICE ADMISSION BEFORE 10PM FOR THOSE DRESSED AS GLITTER GLAM ROCKSTARS"

 

by Benco
1-07-02
WAS WALKING TO SCHOOL LISTENING TO BOOM BOOMFIRE THIS MORNING AND I WAS LIKE *ZOOM*

 

by Benco
1-07-02
WHY IS THIS COMIC HERE

 

by Benco
1-11-02
I HAVE NOTHING TO DO BUT PLAY THPS2 ON GBA :(
LEMMER GET NAKED AND RUN DOWN THE STREET THAT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING TO DO
NO THE NEIGHBORS ARE USED TO SEEING MY DICK BY NOW
AND TASTING IT AS WELL, SO I HEAR
THEN GET A VAGINA POST HASTE!
VAGIN-O-MATIC

 

by Benco
1-11-02
WILDKARRDE, WE NEED TO LIVE TOGETHER AND FILM IT ALL LIVE FOR THE INTERNET
AND ME TOO BUT ONLY IF THERE'S GAY SEX INVOLVED
LET ME GUESS.. YOU'RE WATCHING DUDE DORM
UHH.. SUPRISINGLY NO.
post it on Kazaa
WILL IT GO IN THE SAME FILE AS YOUR KIDDIE PORN?

 

by Benco
1-12-02
MY WOULD BE SISTER WAS AN ABORTION I WISH SHE WASNT THOUGH
I WAS an abortion. I'm just very stubborn.
I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE AN OLDER SISTER
II probably was not wanted But who cares! IM HERE NOW, AND IM READY FOR LOVE
Fish - you're not now.
I'M STILL IN FEAR THAT MY PARENTS MAY ABORT ME

 

by Benco
1-18-02
if you put enough sugar on these it tastes just like the marshmellow krispy treat things
INDEED! AND IT LEAVES BEHIND A WHOLE SHITLOAD OF GLUCOSE MILK WHEN YOU'RE DONE!
YES! THIS PROVES MY THEORY THAT MILK + SUGER = MARSHMELLOWS + BUTTER
INDUBIOUSLY! YOU HAVE MADE LEAPS AND BOUNDS IN THE FIELD OF MILKYOLOGY
SO IF WE PUT ENOUGH SUGER IN THE MILKYWAY, WILL IT EXPLODE INTO A GIANT BUTTERY MARCHMELLOW>?
YEAH! KID'S'LL LOVE IT!

 

by Benco
1-18-02
Where we last left our heros:
WE'LL BUY STOCKS IN MARSHMELLOW COMPANTIES BEFORE DOING IT WE'LL BECOME MILLIONARS!
INDEED! THIS IS A BRILLIANT PLAN YOU'VE HATCHED, BENCO
BUT CAN WE FIND ENOUGH SUGER?
HMMM I KNOW OF A SUGAR FACTORY NEAR MY HOUSE! OR WE COULD JUST MAKE A SUGAR ROCKET AND LAUNCH IT INTO THE SUN
OR PUT A SUGAR FACTORY ON THE SUN SO IT WILL CRANK OUT SUGER FOREVER
INDEED! SHE'S GOING CLUBBING OR SOMETHING

 

by Benco
1-18-02
TONIGHT HAS BEEN HORRIBLE IN TERMS OF WACKY COINCIDENCES WITH MY FATHER FIRST BITCHES AND CLONING WITH BENCO AND NOW HE WALKED IN WHILE I WAS SNIFFING MY CROTCH
MAYBE HE JUST THINKS YOUR TURNING INTO A DOG
why were you sniffing your crotch besides the obvious reasons :(
I THOUGHT I SMELLED SOMETHING!
MY NUTS ALWAYS SMELL LIKE MAC AND CHEESE
sometimes i am glad i'm not a guy

 

by Benco
1-21-02
It'sumpossable... regulations on phone lines make it that way.
UHH YEAH HE HAS ITS CALLED SOFTWARE COMPRESSION FATTYS
he still downloaded at 5.4 max a sec.
MY GOD MY COCK IS ARD
ON THE NEXT TIME SQUAD: GEORGE W. BUSH IS ABOUT TO WIN THE PRESIDENCY!!! CAN OTTO, TUDDRUSSEL, AND LARRY PREVENT THIS BEFORE THE WORLD GOES TO HELL? FIND OUT!

 

by Benco
1-23-02
I AM AN EXPERT ON PUBERTY BOOKS BECAUSE I PICK THEM UP AT THE LIBRARY WHEN IT'S SLOW
I ALSO READ TEEN SUICIDE AND TEEN ALCOHOLISM BOOKS
WUTUP G DAWGS FUNK MONEY ALL UP IN DA HIZZOUSE

 

by Benco
1-26-02
seasnol ol that is usch a gay topic zzblue who is playing win
HOW WOULD ONE SUCK BALLS?
LOOKING UP EXAMPLES ON MORPHEUS
LAMMY IS DRUNK AGAIN, ISN'T HE?
bithcc
|3itch: TAKE THE SCROTUM, POP IT IN YOUR MOUTH

 

by Benco
2-03-02
I DON'T REMEMBER ELORIERL
what?!
Apparently Fishy don't remember ya Lori...
IF I DON'T REMEMBER YOU ITS PRETTY OBVIOUS YOU DONT EXIST
that's terrible.
IT'S OK MOST OF THESE PEOPLE DON'T EXIST

 

by Benco
2-03-02
A GIRL?! A GIRL IS IN THE CHANNEL BAN IT, BAN IT
THE ONLY GIRLS WE ALLLOW HERE ARE GUYS PRETENDING TO BE GIRLS (ZAMROS)
(ATHENA)
uhh... Kracken, |3itch...
KRACKEN AND LAURA ARE NOT GIRLS JUST DON'T TELL DRACO / NADIR
Daemon: yeah, whats your point?

 

by Benco
2-03-02
I WISH I WAS A GIRL :( I WOULD SUCK COCK SO MUCH I MEAN, MORE THAN NOW
BEING A GIRL WOULD BE GREAT BECUASE YOU COULD HAVE SEX WITH GUYS ALL THE TIME AND NO ONE WOULD CARE.
BENCO: AND YOU WOULD BE CALLED A SLUT!! ITS LIKE HEAVEN
LAMMY WOULD BE SO PRREGNANT, HOWEVER.
You don't WANT to be bleeding and in pain for a week out of the month!
WELL I WOULDN'T EVER GET PERIODS BECAUSE I'D BE PREGNANT ALL THE TIME WOULDN'T I

 

by Benco
2-03-02
AND WENT AROUND IN A WHEELCHAIR LIKE ALL MY LIFE BUT EXERCISED MY LEGS SECRETLY AND THEN JUMPED OUT AND STARTED BREAK-DANCING
YOU COULD GO TO A CRIPPLE CONVENTION AND GET UP IN THE MIDDLE AND SHOUT 'GET WITH THE FUNK' AND JUMP ONTO THE TABLE
THAT WOULD BE THE BEST THING EVER GO DO THAT
BETTER YET, AN AUTISTIC CRIPPLE
AN AUTISTIC CRIPPLE WITH ME
WHILE I'M WISHING, I WISH I HAD FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS

 

by Benco
2-03-02
We will miss you both

 

by Benco
2-08-02
HEY FISHFUD
SHUT UP

 

by Benco
2-11-02
I HAVE AN IDEA FOR YOU TO MAKE SOME MONEY BUY A UKELELE AND A LARGE WAREHOUSE
RENT OUT THE WAREHOUSE AND PLAY THE UKELELE IN IT WHILE DANCING NAKED ALL DAY LONG EVENTUALLY YOU'LL WIN THE LOTTERY
I SHOULD JUST BUY A HOUSE AND CALL IT A GAYSEX HOUSE AND CHARGE PEOPLE ADMISSION
WOULD I GET IN FOR FREE?
YOU'D BE THE MAIN ATTRACTION!

 

by Benco
2-15-02
JUGGLE YOUR PENIS AND A CHAINSAW
I TRIED THAT ONCE AND I CHOPPED OFF MY CHAINSAW WITH MY PENIS BY ACCIDENT

 

by Benco
2-15-02
I WANT A REALDOLL AND I WANT IT NOW
I STILL HAVEN'T FIGURED OUT THE MYSTERY OF HOW THE MALE REALDOLL GETS A BONER
A COMPLEX SYSTEM OF STRINGS AND PULLIES
WOW YOU LEARN SOMETHING NEW EVERY DAY

 

by Benco
3-03-02
BENCO PENIS, MOUTH, NOW
HUHGGLGHLUGKLG
BETTER
HGLUHLGH* COUGH*COUGH*CHOKING HELP*COUGH *GAK**COUGH* ugh, fish, you were supossed to piss in my mouth to wash down the jizz.
SORREY I GUESS MY HEART JUST ISNT IN IT TODAY!

 

by Benco
3-08-02
HEY WHEN WE ARE ALL GROWN UP AND HAVE KIDS EVERYONE SHOULD MEET AND PIT OUR KIDS AGAINST EACH OTHER IN A 5 DAY BATTLE ROYALE
"KID RANCHER"
MY KID WILL KICK ALL YOUR KIDS ASSES
MINE WILL BE PIXIES THEY'LL STRIP SEDUCTIVELY AND DISTRACT YOUR KIDS
ALL MY KID NEEDS IS HIS WITS AND HIS AMAZINLGY LARGE PENIS
I GUESS YOU'RE ASSUMING THAT THE BIG OGRE PENIS GENE SKIPS A GENERATION

 

by Benco
3-28-02
ANY ZZT GAME WITH CODE DICK AND THE ENTIRE MILLENIUM SERIES IS GOING TO ROCK
SET SAIL FOR COCK!
IT FEATURES SUCH ADVANCES IN MODERN PROGRAMMING SUCH AS:
sex
GAY

 

by Benco
3-29-02
how are you
very very good!
why very very good
because i got FUCKED today
by who
dad

 

by Benco
4-25-02
YOU'RE ALL GAY
NO, YOU ARE.
I AGREE WITH BENCO

 

by Benco
5-01-02
i want some PUS--- uh
I feel another bencomic coming up!
MY PREFAB COMIC SENSES ARE TINGLING
IT'S PEANUT BUTTER TIME, IT'S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME
Dammit, where's my watch.
BURIED DEEP IN MY BOWELS.

 

by Benco
5-29-02
SOCIAL SERVICES JUST RUNG UP THEY JUST TOOK MY SISTERS KIDS AWAY APPARANTLY SHE HAS 2 WEEKS TO STOP BEING A DRUG ADDICT OR THEY GET PUT INTO PERMANANET CARE
WHO WILL YOU MOLEST NOW?
WOW, IN AMERICA THEY'DE JUST BE LIKE "THIS MOTHER IS A DRUG ADDICT! QUICK GIVE HER MORE DRUGS SO SHE DOESN'T SELL HER KIDS FOR SOME!"
AMERICA HAS JERRY SPRINGER THOUGH
HE SOLVES ALL PROBLEMS :\
I'm listening to BJORK

 

by Benco
6-06-02
I had a dream CAPTAIN JACK poored SPRITE all over WILDKARRDE'S NAKED BODY and made me LICK IT OFF
YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO LICK SPRITE OFF KARRDE NOT ALL OF IT HE WOULD ABSORB IT BEFORE YOU GOT TO HIS LEGS
IT WAS AN AWEFUL LOT OF SPRITE
THERES AN AWFUL LOT OF KARRDE
Karrde's not fat at all. I saw him on his webcam
IVE SEEN HIM NAKED. I WIN

 

by Benco
6-29-02
god, i'm such an asshole.
i wish i had something to say, at this point.
ran out of song lyrics?
now's not the time to be insulting, benco.
i have plenty of song lyrics.

 

by Benco
7-07-02
BENCO FELLATE ME
HUHGLUHGULGHUL GHLUHGGGLUHGLUH
OH THE HORROR
Did he backwash?
FROM WAYWARDS LJ: i bout a pair of swimming trunks at the mall today...fwee...i'm going to the beach
AND NOW I IMAGINE WAYWARD IN SWIMMING TRUNKS AND VOMIT

 

by Benco
7-09-02
HA HA YOU THINK CHICKEN MC NUGGETS ARE BAD
LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT SLIM JIMS
AND NOT JUST SLIM JIMS, THOSE OFF-BRAND MEAT WANDS
NOW THOSE ARE BAD
I COULDN'T THINK HOW ANYTHING NAMED "MEAT WANDS" COULD BE GOOD
Off-brand meats wand! From tokyo! They for to elect your meatPOLE!

 

by Benco
7-09-02
so im takin my shower
then i whip out the old hockey shampoo
I WAS LIKE OMFG I LOVE YOU HOCKEY SHAMPOO
so i take a swig of it
cuz it smelled so f'in good
dude it tasted nasty

 

by Benco
7-11-02
I GOT THIS NIFTY SQUIRT NOZZLE WITH A LONG TUBE YOU CAN PUT IN A CONTAINER OF LIQUID AND SQUIRT IT
WOW EURA I BOW TO YOU AS THE MASTER RACE

 

by Benco
7-11-02
I need to make a correct about our last comic.
It appears the last line was supossed to coe out of Fishfood's head and not Eura's.
in other news refreshments are available in the lounge!

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