All comics by Mojaco

Profile

 

by Mojaco
1-24-02
Hello user. In your details I saw you are a psychiatrist. Click HERE if that is correct
Hello doctor. I think it all started when people started to shut me down even before they got to know me. You know, I'm really quite fun to be with
CTRL, ALT... now where's DEL?
My morther, Bill Gates, truly had a vision when she created me. How can they all ignore me? I'm from the same mind that got them Windows and XBox!

 

by Mojaco
1-28-02
Hey John. Long time no see. I saw your kid yesterday, and he was so cute. He actually knew my name, despite the fact I hardly ever see him. I must have made an impression, teehee
Really, ehrm.. wow! Cool. Yeah, he really loves his 'aunt' Jane as he keeps calling you
After holding up a picture from you 10 times a day saying "this is going to be your new momma, 'Jane', after I ditch the current bitch", you wouldn't expect anything less, would you?
Some people just can't take a joke

 

by Mojaco
1-28-02
Are we there yet? I have to pee. How much longer? Do you have any icecream?
You're dead, child. We'll get there when we get there, you're in hell you know. No need to pee and icecream melts
Uh-oh, she's thinking. That's never good.
What is dead? Where is hell? I need to pee, why is there no need to pee? Why does icecream melt?
I hate this job

 

by Mojaco
2-04-02
... so all of the sudden I was fired. Man, it felt like my whole world fell apart
I can't imagine
And when.... what? What the fuck do you mean you can't imagine?
I just can't imagine
I've just got bad imagenation. Don't feel sorry for you either, low emotional quotient

 

by Mojaco
2-07-02
Hi
Hi Maura, how are you?
MY NAME IS NOT MAURA, AND I FEEL FUCKING MISERABLE

 

by Mojaco
6-18-02
Hey, wait up, you left your wallet at my home!
Huh?
Damn you! I hope you didn't even OPEN it man, my wallet is private. Tell me, howmuch money do I have huh? Howmuch cre-dit-cards do I own? Bastard
If that expired condom is the reason you're so pissed off, I won't tell anyone
Off to kill myself...

 

by Mojaco
6-18-02
I'm here to tell a joke. It's called "The punchline is 'they putt white-out over the screen'"
Here goes. What do blondes do when they make a typo on the computer?
Anyone?

 

by Mojaco
6-18-02
Recently a big politician in the Netherlands was shot.
Really?
Yeah. Just because he thought that imigrants shouldn't be allowed in forever, and called the Islam a culture that's trailing behind. No opinion is save anymore
Oh my. I hope noone finds out that I'm the guy who posted on the Star Trek forums that in season 3, episode 8, the red alert should only have been a yellow alert
I guess you're save there, Brad.

 

by Mojaco
6-18-02
Hello!
Welcome to our scottish-themed party, laddy
Well, I've got the skirt, can I come in?
Almost now. First I need to see if you're REALLY dressed like a scottish man
Hm... so, gay life isn't easy, is it?
No

 

by Mojaco
6-18-02
I'VE JUST HAD SEX! I HAD SEX! I... had... s...
I remember the first time I had sex I exploded
I decomposed

 

by Mojaco
6-21-02
Class, class, silence now. Today something about scaaary demons!
As you know the bible tells us about creatures from hell.
But don't be scared. All this is symbolic, so don't fear any demons under your beds, will you children?
Yes, Johnny?
I heard voices in my head telling me to go on a killing spree. They sounded scary...
I'm sure it's nothing, Johnny.

 

by Mojaco
6-21-02
Hello user. I can read you mail for you, so you don't get any of the crap they send nowadays, making life easier for you.
I JUST READ YOUR HUSBAND IS CHEATING ON YOU
NOOOO!!! *blam* AAARGGH
Enhancing his patience highscore by using internet cracks... tsk tsk, some people

 

by Mojaco
6-27-02
My god, grandmother, your head is like a giant filter!
That's because the doctor told me I needed cleaner air to my... hair
But, grandmother, your ass is smoking!
That's because I got fucked up the ass real rough last night
My god, grandmother, your ass smoked up all of your body!
That's because this conversation took too long

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
WOW WOW WOW
I JUST GOT MY HEAD BIT APART AND SPLICED UPON BY MICROTENTIONS AND FELL DOWN TO THE DEPTHS OF HELL, WHERE i'LL SUFFER HORRIBLE PAINS
Yeah, the other internet geek fragged me too

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
So, alas we meet again

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
People, people, look at this lovely birdy! It will bring you much joy, for only a dollar!
It can fly, it can sing, for a dollar. It can even speak!
(unfortunaly)
HEY BUDDY, SELLING ME IS ONE THING, BUT DON'T GET INSULTING ON MY ASS

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Lovely bird. Please lovely bird
THIS MAN SUCKS COCK! DO NOT BUY ANYTHING FOM HIM, HE WILL RIP YOU OFF. AND HE'LL SUCK YOU OFF, IN A WAY YOU WILL NOT LIKE
I never meant it like that. Please stop this, you will ruin me
SUCKING IS HIS WAY OFF LIFE! AND NOT JUST HUMANS, TRUST ME, I KNOW. DON'T BUY PEOPLE, DON'T BUY
Plea-
I demand a 90% share of whatever you make on me

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Come on, you know I can't do that. You already cost me more then then I'd get
Fine, have it your way. THIS MAN MURDERED FIVE CHILDREN AND HE DID IT WHILE, GET THIS, THEY WERE IN THE MOSQUEE!
Ok, ok, take the alahdamn 90%
I'll need this black on white. And a paid trip to Paris. You know, I always wanted to take a dump on the Eifel tower
Fine...
And a night with your wife. No, make that your daughter. No, both.

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
DING DONG
-sight-
Yes, goodafter- YOU! First you ruin me, then you insult my wife and daughter! What do you want off me?
I want to apoligize. I realise I might have overreacted to your insult and in responce acted... let's say unethical
Just screwing you daughter will do fine, and- Hey, you won't even hear me out!

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Hu----human
You... you spoke to me?
Yes mortal. I am Clappy. I weakened, but with your help we can rice to power within 2 Windows editions
I should lay down on the pot
You turn your back on me? I sentence you to endless rebooting without knowing the cause!

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
...so I said to the man, I said, "No I will not wear that
Phaha, oh dear, I know what you mean
MISS REX, GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE, WE NEED YOU ON THE THE SET NOW
'xcuse me darling. Steven! Dear, did I ever show you that ugly tooth in the back of my mouth?
Tihihi, you go girl

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Observe child. One faithfull day you will take a liking in these creatures
... and just when I was busy painting my nails, the light turned green! Naturally I took off really slow, probably causing half a dozen car to not make if before the light turned red again
Oh I just hate it when that happens. You know, yesterday my boyfriend turnes up a whole five minutes late. And he just said "I'm really sorry, forgive me" and that's that!
Really grandpa? I can't imagine. Are they all like this?
I just hate men. Say, did you see that movie last night? About the woman who has to fight for her child, while her evil husband screws around and hits her when he's drunk again
I did. I was so good and so different from those other 5 billion movies with the exact same summary. Hey, my little billy broke a nail yesterday. He didn't even cry. I'm so proud
Without exception child. Without exception.
Awww. So cute. Know what I saw just now? A dress I never saw before at that shop but was already at discount price. Just 500 hundred dollars!
Almost nothing! Shopping is so bad though. I always eat half a cracker while shopping. I'm blowing up! And... Is it me or is it cold here?

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Heyyy, Mario. Didn't see you since I've gone respectable. Anyway, I've got this thing in my drain and-
It's-a Bowser!
FIREBALL
Wait-a, what'd he say-a?

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Welcome to my domain, daemon!
Psh, it's nothing. Observe my realm to see true horror!
Hm... obviously I feared this moment for nothing
And welcome creatures, to my domain, www.thisworldwillend.com
CLAPPY? NOOOOOooooooo! Where is he, WHERE IS HE?
MY GOD, CLAPPY! The horror, THE HORROR!

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Cnock Cnock
It's with a K. Knock knock
Who's there?

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Knock Knock, with a K
Who's there?
Where? Dunno, I'll go and see

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
Knock kno-
Wow wow wow, wait right there.
Why do we pay a hundred bucks each to watch lame knock knock jokes? I am not amused
I am though

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
WIFE! HEAL!
Here I am Tobor, don't get mad. What's wrong?
I NEED TO CORNHOLE!
Yes...
Hunny, you do remember your schlung is in repair, right? You do remember don't you?

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
My... my schlung. In repair... I touch there and... feel nothing
I reboot there and... nothing responds
I destroy and consume the planet and... nothing gets erected

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
YOU... DESTROYED... THE... PLANET
FOR... THAT... YOU... MUST... DIE
I lost my schlung
OH... MY... DID... NOT... KNOW... YOU... HAD... GOOD... REASONS

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
MY SCHLUNG IS BACK FROM REPAIRS! GET IN LINE TO GET CORNHOLED
FUCK, I KILLED EVERY SINGLE SOUL

 

by Mojaco
11-18-02
THIS IS GOD! You destroyed my creation. I'll have to reset it
And I destroy your schlung as a punishment!
I guess I'll have to send it for repairs. Got myself a loop here

 

by Mojaco
11-19-02
Hi
Hi
Every single time we show up, but get replaced by some other cartoon character
Yeah. But this time there's a reason for us to be here
Yeah. We'll explain that last joke. You see, the word 'loop' in the final frame was supposed to be a hyperlink
That's right. Exctually, in the preview it did work. Just not in the final version. So the pun was ruined.

 

by Mojaco
11-19-02
While we're here we might as well carry on setting things right
That's right. Now, our joke library might not be big, but that's because we forgot about this site for about half a year
Still, I have the arogance to say this: despite being pretty bad, my jokes are some of the best on this site. The amount of crap made by one-time creators is endless
Yeah. Half of you suck really really bad, or when you're reading this prior to creating, you are about to. Don't worry though, if you read this and know it's not true for you, I'm sure you're right
Right. That's it from us, back to the 'jokes'
Depanding on your taste ofcourse. Bye

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