All comics by NeoVid

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by NeoVid
4-30-01
Geese's boys have sent the new Page Break on his evil mission!
Kim Maura... I can live with it...
PAGE BREAK WILL CORNHOLE YOU!!
Page Break, wait a second...
MAKE THIS QUICK. PAGE BREAK HAS A LOT OF WORK TO DO.
Why is it you're called Page Break when you're a panel divider?
...PAGE BREAK FEELS LOST AND CONFUSED NOW. WHY MUST YOU MESS WITH PAGE BREAK'S MIND?

 

by NeoVid
5-01-01
A lot of you have done warped comics about me...
Well, I want to tell you one thing...
I can honestly say you're all damned funny.

 

by NeoVid
5-11-01
Scary...
Blech...
I wish he wasn't here to see this...
I wish I wasn't here to see this...
GRANNY! FOR GOD'S SAKE, STOP PRANCING ALL OVER AND STABBING PEOPLE WITH CANDLES!!
Runs in the family, doesn't it?

 

by NeoVid
5-15-01
...Getting to be the most overused character here!
...Being, uh, like... wow, I dunno, man.
...+4|k!ng |!k3 +h!5, D00d!
...Blind. Also deaf, mute and brain-damaged.
...What he said.
...Something that will never happen with these two.
...Usually really lonely, for him.
He's right!! Why does he have to be right?? *sob*

 

by NeoVid
5-16-01
Someone is making a great impression on the people...
He's promised to stop all H4x0r5 from making comics!
And he's going to require all comics to actually be funny!
Who is making these promises to make stripcreator a better place?
And he's going to outlaw all donkey sodomy references!
AND people who say 'moh' or 'all your base' will be shot on sight! *BLAM* urrrrkk...
It is the new hero of the people, Senator Lipservice!
Good news! I've made Tobor promise to stop cornholing!
RAAR!! TOBOR DEMANDS LIP SERVICE!!

 

by NeoVid
5-22-01
Senator Lipservice decides to put an end to conspiracies.
I am changing the order of the alphabet! Did you people know why it's laid out the way it is?
It's an incantation for summoning the great demon Eybeeseadee-ee-efgeeaicheyejay-kayelimenohpeaquare-es-teeyouveedubyuw-exwhyzed! Simply saying the entire thing summons great evil!
Actually, Senator, the only people who pronounce the last letter of the alphabet as "zed" instead of "zee" are the Brits...
...And who cares if they summon evil on themselves? Thanks for telling me, Dr Pedantic!

 

by NeoVid
6-01-01
They want new recurring characters, and they dare to forget about ME, Senator Lipservice? I'll have to do something about this...
You expect anyone to believe that you'll get something done someday?
Watch it, punk. I can sic my lawyer on you.
Like I'm scared of anyone who works for you...
Um... uh oh.
[Hello, puny thing. It is Xox-xox, the Senator's legal representation. It has been drinking sulphuric acid and has a small bladder. Hold still.]

 

by NeoVid
6-06-01
Bob of Nazareth teaches Jon his greatest spiritual lesson.
Y'ever thought of just getting REVENGE on yer problems?
Uh, well... I could never do something like that.
That's what I thought. So I did ya a little favor, and called someone who can help ya out, and you'll get the credit...
Or the blame.
RAAAHR!! THIS IS A TOBOR-WILL-CORNHOLE-YOU-GRAM COURTESY OF YOUR VICTIM, JON!!
I should've seen this coming.

 

by NeoVid
6-07-01
Impressive little yacht you have, Anonymous Donor #12. You did bring the 27 bottles of LSD-laced champagne, right?
Of course I did, Senator! My servants will be right along with it.
I am wondering how you managed to get so much money saved up in just a few months...
Simple. It's all from hard work, careful planning...
The hell it is! That cracker told God to fuck off, and then sold his soul to reinstate the slave trade!
Ah, the American dream lives on!

 

by NeoVid
6-08-01
A special announcement from the Animal Sodomy Association.
As spokesdonkey for the group, I am the last person to object to animal sodomy.
However, the stunning lack of creativity that most of you show is disturbing, and could easily be corrected. Observe.
You hold still while I soften you up for my six friends! OHOHOHOHO!!
See? Originality is easy and fun! ...Mmm, barbed wire...

 

by NeoVid
6-11-01
So, Mr Tobor, I was hoping you'd explain some of the influences that made you the twisted sex machine you are today.
HMM. TOBOR REMEMBERS WHEN TOBOR WAS YOUNGER, AND SAW A GODZILLA MOVIE FOR THE FIRST TIME...
wow! tobor isn't sure what that is, but tobor wants some of it!
Am I ever glad I brought a cyanide pill for myself...
WANT TO HEAR ABOUT WHEN TOBOR INVENTED EDIBLE MANRAPE JELLY(TM)?

 

by NeoVid
6-13-01
Hello? There was supposed to be someone else in this panel... Hello?
...I was rotting someone's mind just a second ago. Where'd he disappear to?
But the other guy in my panel is still here...
AHAAHAA! I have conquered the Right Character slots for all time! Half of Stripcreator is yours for the taking, my minions! BWAHAAHAA...

 

by NeoVid
6-15-01
You know, this would have been the funniest strip ever if the sound guy had shown up today.
Did Tobor really say "UVULA BROOM WILL BROOM YOU!?"

 

by NeoVid
6-16-01
Dammit, I only said "dialogue" when I should have said "text." This is your fault, isn't it?
Yes! You will never escape the vengeance of Miss Interpretation!

 

by NeoVid
6-20-01
You know what's great about summer? Nothing.
Hey, I get to leave school and you still have to work!
See! That's what I mean... there's nothing good about it. I was 350 pounds until I started sweating for 60 hours straight!
I hate 150 degree heat...
Don't knock the heat, man. You can get free grilled pigeons right off the sidewalk!

 

by NeoVid
6-20-01
Guess what, Gabe1, I'm back, and I'm taking your role.
'Bout damn time. Ever since that Tobor thing happened, I've been looking to quit.
Uh... you're not going to fight to keep your job or anything?
That's right! Stick that up your ass if you don't like it.
But... I do like it.
Then stick it farther.

 

by NeoVid
6-27-01
Yo. I'm replacing my brother as Gabe in these strips from now on.
That's all right, I guess. As long as you're nicer than the last one.
Nice? Of course I'm nice, you ^%&#head loser gimp. I'm the nicest damn person you'll ever meet, dumbass...
...You tryin' to make me look bad by saying that? I'm gonna get you for that...
Oh good, he is nicer.

 

by NeoVid
6-29-01
So, we're stars in this comic strip generator thing now?
Yeah! I think that since we're the default characters, we'll end up as mascots.
I think we're more likely to end up being overused in all sorts of horrible strips I don't even want to think about.
...Yeah.
In fact, Captain Obvious should have said that.
"Hi! I'm possessing this little Asian girl just so I can tell you that I don't exist yet!"

 

by NeoVid
7-01-01
You say the people who own you colonized the Moon 42 years ago? We never heard about it until we came here!
That is correct, sir.
So why didn't you tell Earth about it?
We are not allowed to use radios.
Oh... you're controlled by an evil dictator or something?
No, we're Amish.

 

by NeoVid
7-08-01
Well, Mr wirthling, the tests show that there's no discernable reason for your illness...
You mean I'm dying and you don't know why!?!
That's correct. Your insurance won't cover your treatments, since they say it's an "act of God."
So how long do I have to live?
27 seconds later...
...Why did you kill ME instead of him??
I don't know! I thought it'd be funny, OK? Jeez...

 

by NeoVid
7-11-01
DAMMIT! CRABBY WON THE LAST CONTEST! JUST BECAUSE HE'S A NEWBIE, TOO!
NEWBIES SHOULD NEVER GET TO WIN!!!
ACTUALLY, NEWBIES VIRTUALLY ALWAYS WIN EARLY IN THEIR STRIPPING CAREERS!!!!
YEAH... ISN'T THAT HOW NEOVID WON THE FIRST TIME?!?!?
WHY YES, IT WAS!!!!!!!
ARGH!!! I'M NO BETTER THAN HE IS!!!
NOW CRABBY'S EVEN MANAGED TO PISS OFF NEOVID!!
THANKS, CAPTAIN OBVIOUS!!!!

 

by NeoVid
7-17-01
And here's our next competitor! Are you ready?
I'm still working up to it... This is the hardest event I ever been in, man... I wouldn't be able to do it without my good friends at Joe Blow's Headshops!
Nice plugola. Now, are you ready for our event... Tongue Dialing? You must dial a phone number using only your tongue and a public pay phone!
Yeah, I think I'm almost stoned enough to try...
While he's gearing up, let's talk with our last competitor...
I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for the good people at 911(TM)!

 

by NeoVid
7-20-01
Excuse me, I have to have a talk with your son... um... daught... whatever that is.
Figures. What did the little punk do this time?
He/she stole my car. Again.
All right... GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!! AND TURN OFF THAT MUSIC!! If I have to listen to one more Sir Mix-A-Lot song... he's not even popular anymore...
Listen, I want the best for you... I even stopped using drugs for a month when I was pregnant, and this is how you repay me?
...You've been "confiscating" my weed again, ain't you, Mom?

 

by NeoVid
7-23-01
Man, I love the jerky this place has... cheap, too...
Why you wittle punks, you think you'we so good...
Man, this homeless guy looks like he's in bad shape... maybe he'd like some jerky...
I used to be popuwar with childwen, but then I was weduced to making powno movies!
Hey... aren't you Elmer Fudd?
Wight! Did you see my wast fiwm, "I Tawt I Taw A Puddy?"

 

by NeoVid
7-24-01
At last, I've found you, evildoer!
If you're looking for an evildoer, try DexX or Brad/Johnny.
Look, kid, I'm just trying to get in character here... anyway, It's curtains for you, criminal scum!
...Puns. Even the writers here don't sink that low. Who are you anyway?
I am... CAPTAIN LOWPASS!
Well. Too bad you're on Stripcreator now, isn't it?

 

by NeoVid
7-24-01
Don't worry Senator Lipservice, I'm here to stop all evil and bad humor!
You need a permit for that.
Hello, Dr Pedantic, I am Captain Lowpass-
Then perhaps you should have arrived here when the Stripcreator was still called Lowpass, shouldn't you?
I am Captain Lowpass-
I'll make sure they spell it right in your obituary!

 

by NeoVid
7-24-01
Asian power!
Christian power!
Black power!
Flower power!
White... uh...
Watch it, you racist scum.

 

by NeoVid
7-31-01
All your base are belong-
SHUT UP!!! ARGH!! I am going to kill whoever put that online!
What you say?
That guy had better hope no one finds him, or he is so dead...
"All your-" *click* "How are you gentl-" *click* "make your time-" *click* "All your Smurf are belong-" *click*
Hee hee... just a few more days, and my AYB virus will have finished off all the humor in the world!

 

by NeoVid
8-02-01
My name's Pete, and I'm a (sorta maverick) cop. Right now there's a supernatural creature trying to stop me...
Shoulda known that I'd have to deal with freaky $#!+ when this started.
If you want to get any farther, you'll have to deface me!
This is the last thing I need when I'm low on ammo. If I can't get past this @$$wipe, this might never end....
I'll give you ten seconds to get out of my way.
PREPARE TO DOOM YOUR MEAT!
If I can't break this curse, I'll be stuck narrating myself and censoring my %^$*in' swear words forever!
Huh... one bullet and it's down.
How can this be?! I am indivisible!

 

by NeoVid
8-03-01
Jon's enlightenment by Jesus' brother Bob continues...
The worst part is having to use stolen jokes all the time. "All your base" wasn't funny then, and it's not now...
Yer just thinking about it the wrong way.
...Hmm. You might have something there. How should I think about it?
Well, for one thing, stolen jokes aren't stolen jokes, they're "references."
And a "reference" that's been used so much it's not funny any more is called a "classic!"
Moh.

 

by NeoVid
8-07-01
You know, I think that gays really shouldn't be allowed in the military, ever.
And I suppose you don't think blacks should be in the army either.
That's right! In fact, neither should asians, latinos, amerinds, the poor, immigrants...
Yeah, the only people who should be allowed in combat are white people who make over $30,000 a year!
...Hell, now I want to agree with him...

 

by NeoVid
8-10-01
The GM and the Hack-and-slasher...
In the clearing, you see a gazebo...
I WASTE IT WITH MY CROSSBOW!
The Newbie and the Scene Stealer
Um... couldya remind me what I roll for an attack?
"With a steely look in his eye, Sir Jaered draws his sword, ready to face down an implacable foe blah blah blah drone drone..."
The Elitist and the Pissed GM
I told you you shouldn't have let these losers into the game.
OK, the gazebo explodes and kills the whole lot of you. Game over, and I'm quitting.

 

by NeoVid
8-17-01
Oh yeah, Pokémon. Sorry, but most of my memories of it were erased by the trauma when I read an Ash/Pikachu X-rated snuff fanfic.
I do remember a few scenes from the games, though... "The JUGGLER wants to fight!"
I choose you!
Goddammit, I am not a Pokéball! I wasn't supposed to split open when you threw me!
"The CUEBALL wants to fight!"
Oh, very funny, dumbass.

 

by NeoVid
8-17-01
You know that toy you've been asking for?
Did you get it? Did you get it?
Your father had to search all over, but he managed to get pick one up on his last business trip! It's right outside.
YAY!
Uh... MOMMY?!
Hi! I'm your new polka man! I can dance and do any polka tune ever made! Here, let me get my accordion...

 

by NeoVid
8-17-01
Eh heh heh heh... at last, it's happened...
...What's happened?
After all this time when I was limited to being a mere Caption Guy...
Good lord no...
I am now... A STRIPCREATOR CHARACTER! Eh heh heh heh heh!!
NOOOO!

 

by NeoVid
8-17-01
So you're the freak who's been writing all these strips.
Yep, that's me. Beware my wrath, and stuff.
Sad. The only thing scary about you is your looks.
Careful what you say to the guy who runs your world, punk.
Like you can really do anything to me. And aren't you supposed to be a huge URL whore?
Out of all the bad things that have ever been said about me, that's the one that's not true. Now, let's cut this short, I have to write something for www.gameeire.com.

 

by NeoVid
8-17-01
And now, making his way to the ring...
Weighing in at maybe 145 pounds, if you count those Popeye-like forearms...
"STONE DRUNK GABE_BILLINGS!"
Oh, very funny, dumbass.

 

by NeoVid
8-20-01
Hmmm....
Hey, I want to ask you something...
Why is it you always smile when you have your hands in your pockets?
Nuh- no reason....

 

by NeoVid
8-24-01
Stripcreator users have lowbrow senses of humor!
Heh heh... if you name the main character of Suikoden 'Bates', they'll keep calling him 'Master Bates'.
Sticks-his-dick-in-your-ass-when-you-have-your-back-turned-man is about to do your mom!
Five, four, three, two...
And I broke Habnem's record of getting off ten times in an hour! Believe it, or I'll make you help me demonstrate.

 

by NeoVid
8-28-01
What the hell? We were supposed to be invading a country, and this is all they put in our way?
Something like this isn't about to stop-
AIIIGGHHH!!
Another one defeated by the world's first antipersonnel mime!

 

by NeoVid
8-28-01
Must... get... outdoors...
Aw, come on. You know you have more stuff to work on online.
Yeah... but I don't have enough time online to get everything done anymore.
That's why you need to dedicate every second to your writing! You know it's true...
Five minutes later.
Yeah! I beat another Ninja! My ranking should go way up!
I'll consume your soul.

 

by NeoVid
8-30-01
Well, it's been a long couple of months, but DragonXero is back!
It really is like looking into a hippy grunge mirror... but anyway, you've been gone two months?
Yep. But at least I came back, unlike, oh, BottleRockett.
Well, since people have have two months to forget who you are, I'd say your ranking has gone down to...
...one notch below Crabby! Say hello to your new sidekick, Crabby!
HELLO TO YOUR NEW SIDEKICK, CRABBY!

 

by NeoVid
9-06-01
whO's yOUr dAddy?
...
I sAId, whO's yOUr dAddy?!
...OH ALRIGHT! TOBOR'S FATHER WAS A GIANT VENDING MACHINE! PLEASE STOP CORNHOLING TOBOR NOW!
y'knOw, thAt jUst rEAlly fUckEd Up my mOOd, mAn. gEt Off mE, yOU bIg rEd shlOngslEEvE.
THERE IS A GOD!

 

by NeoVid
9-07-01
Here's what happens when you put the wrong combinations of characters together.
Forumuser Combination Technique!
Spankling!
Wirthling!
Combine to form... WANKLING!
Oh, very funny, dumbass.

 

by NeoVid
9-15-01
That's my last time snorting bleach!
Back to smoking linoleum for me.

 

by NeoVid
9-15-01
Now I will absorb your soul, you drunken fool!
AAIIGGH!
Mmm... lemon flavored.

 

by NeoVid
9-15-01
Most of these comics make no sense.
*SNORT*
NOW they're funny!

 

by NeoVid
9-17-01
All the land mines I planted are working. NeoVid, have you and Spanks gotten rid of any newbies?
Dude, this isn't Spankling, it's a newbie I hit with a Homofication Ray.
Ew, what's happening to kramer-vs-kramer over there?
Let go of that.
No.

 

by NeoVid
9-18-01
Hmmm... The Church of Arse needs something we can consider unholy...
Yeah... but what should this church use to represent heresy?
I've got an idea! Tousers!
What?
Yknow, trousers without the arse in them!
Excuse me, I've got to go retch because of that pun...

 

by NeoVid
9-21-01
What, you think I made all those posts just to get a higher ranking?
No, but now people who don't post much are way behind, even if they've been around a long time.
Hey, you can't blame me for having too much free time.
Your a fag!1! Goh to hel yu homoh!
What the hell?
I just thought I'd skip to how arguments here always end.

Showing page 2.

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