All comics by Speez

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by Speez
11-03-01
Denza mad that Speez takes to long in the bathroom.
Here we go again.
Dear god man, how long does it take for you to take a crap?
Denza, I can't just sit down and let it fly. It takes careful planning and excution.
Speez, you sit on the toliet and drop a dookie.
Hey, did the mailman drop off my mail.
Yeah, he set it on the ground here. It's freaky you have him deliver it to the bathroom door.

 

by Speez
11-03-01
Denza picks up Speez's mail.
Hey, it got quiet really quick out there! What are you doing.
According to this, he may have already won five thousand dollars.
Denza, I've never heard you shut your mouth for more than 30 seconds.
Here's one from the people of "Big Franks" thanking Speez for his support. Because of him, they can put their kids though college.
Denza, are you reading my mail?
Whoa, in this one, MDD is poclaiming her undying love for Speez, and she must have him right here and now.

 

by Speez
11-03-01
Denza is still reading Speez's mail.
Denza, help a brother out and put down my mail.
I can't even read this letter because all the white powder on it.
Come on Denza, the stress your putting me though isn't making it come out faster.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Denza, why are you running away so fast?

 

by Speez
11-03-01
Later...
Finally done. Now I can see why Denza ran away so fast.
...$%@!
I got to pee now.

 

by Speez
11-03-01
Yes folks, he's still in the bathroom.
Ahhh, finally! I'm done "making water".
....$%@!
No matter how much I empty out, I always never get it all the first time.

 

by Speez
11-04-01
After opening one of Speez's letter and finding white powder all over it, Denza runs to a board at UBCS so not to infect anyone else. In another words, he's at the Video games forum.
OH MY GOD! I have a letter in my hand that has white powder all over it! Oh god, what do I do? What do I do?
I'm going to get sick and die, and everyone will miss me, and it's all cause of that stupid Speez. Wait...
...WHY AM I STILL HOLDING IT!

 

by Speez
11-04-01
Yes, Denza is still holding the letter.
There's only one thing I can do with this letter.
Note: I hope Denza an American.
It's not only my duty as a UBCS member, but an American citizen!
Later, while CP is in his private room.
Why is someone trying to slip a piece of paper under my door?

 

by Speez
11-04-01
Denza, I'm disappointed in you! You should know better than just trying to dump the white powdered letter on me.
I think you know what to do with that letter now.
I sure do.
Here Ian, this letter is for you.
Oh! Oh! I letter for me! Oh, happy dance, oh happy dance! I have to do the happy dance. It's fun to do, and easy to. Everyone do the happy dance.

 

by Speez
11-04-01
Note: There is no pic of Ian character holding a letter. So just pretend Ian is doing what he's saying.
How can I do this to my fellow man? I mean, Ian's human too, I think.
OH MY GOD, I LETTER FOR IAN!
I'm a bad person. I need to be spank. Where's GD?
I can't see the letter cause of this white powder on it.
Ok, maybe I won't miss Ian that much.
I'll just lick off this powder.

 

by Speez
11-04-01
Speez looking at the mess Denza made with his mail.
Man, Denza went though all my mail. Hey, here's one from MDD. But Denza messed it up so much, I can't read it.
Darn it not in yet.
I thought my free sample of baby powder was suppose to come in today.

 

by Speez
11-04-01
Speez, I did something bad.
Did you wet yourself again?
Well yes, but I opened one your letters and it was covered in white powder, so I gave it to Ian.
Oh, is that all? No, that's not what you think, it was my Baby Powder I get in the mail.
Umm, why do you need baby powder?
You think my butt is silky smooth naturally???

 

by Speez
11-04-01
Together we stand

 

by Speez
11-04-01
Humor me, and pretend TGS is holding a ray gun.
Hey, JNJ, look at this ray gun a made!
What does it do?
It will change the course of human life forever. It's so grand, i can't even say what it will do.
You don't know do you?
Well, that too.
I'll be off in the distance, where you little ray gun can't get me.

 

by Speez
11-04-01
I need something to test my ray gun on.
But what?
I think unstick the FanFic rules for no good reason, which Speez stuck.
hmmmmmmm

 

by Speez
11-04-01
Speez shoots CP with his ray gun.
?
There's something you don't see everyday.

 

by Speez
11-05-01
I have perfect idea, that will change the world for the good forever. I just can't lose my train of thought.
Holy crap, what the heck is that, and is his hand in his pocket?
DANG IT, I FORGOT!

 

by Speez
11-05-01
CP, trapped in his new body, tries to get help from Ian.
What's this, a new playa? And he has his hands in his pants. My kinda of man.
Ian, you need to help me!
Oh, I have a better place for you to stick that hand.
!?!?!?!
I didn't piss off the little gay kid.
I had enough of your gay crap. Let's go right now.

 

by Speez
11-05-01
CP goes to Speez to change him back.
Hey, it's the Mini-CP
Speez, you need to change me back.
I'm a little gay guy who likes to stick his hands in my pants.
What, and turn you back into a big gay guy who likes to stick his hands in his pants?
Come on, my hands having too much fun down there!

 

by Speez
11-05-01
Speez is fixing the settings on his ray gun to change CP back.
Ok, let me just fiddle with my handle.
You don't need my permission, you fiddle with your handle 24/7.
Oops, my finger slipped.
Ok, that is different.
I'm not a happy clown.

 

by Speez
11-05-01
ILC askes Speez to zap him with his ray gun in an attempt to turn him back to his normal self.
I dunno if this hurts or not.
I don't care. Anything to get my orignal body back.
I hate it when they scream.
ARGH!
I guess it didn't change you.
Not exactly. I'm a lady squirrel now...

 

by Speez
11-05-01
Misty in her room, alone.
I wonder if Speez has gotten my letter I sent a few days ago.
I'll go check on Speez, to see if he got it.
And so, another wacky UBCS comic saga begins.
It should grow into some huge funny out of control story that everyone will laugh at.

 

by Speez
11-05-01
Umm, Speez, I was wondering.
Yeah, yeah, spit it out, I'm trying to get GD drunk again so maybe I'll get lucky with her.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN! Oh sorry, I mean did you get anything interesting in the mail?
Oh, go check the bathroom. Now I have to split. Catch you on the flip-idy-flop
Why is it everytime I talk to boys they point me towards the bathroom.

 

by Speez
11-09-01
Ok, why do all the boys send me to the bathroom when I try to talk to them.
Like I'm going to believe that Speez really has his mail sent to the bathroom. I bet I cookie he was lying.
Misty sees Speez's mail.
I'll be darned, I owe someone a cookie.

 

by Speez
11-09-01
Man, Speez has all his mail from the last year here. And I really got to take a pee.
Wait a second.
I do feel naughty reading Speez's mail while sitting on the toliet.

 

by Speez
11-09-01
In our last comic...well...if you don't remeber, go read it again.
Man, Speez decorated this bathroom nice.
He hung pictures on the wall, put in neat lighting, a cusion seat on the toliet. Wait, here's a button.
Misty pushed the button.
A BIG SCREEN TV WITH ASSORTED PRONO TAPES!

 

by Speez
11-09-01
Much later
Ok, Speez kept all his letters here, and mine not in here. I'll go ask him about it. Oh yeah, I gotta flush.
*#$@
Don't you hate when you don't get it all out the first trip.

 

by Speez
11-09-01
Misty confronts Speez about not finding her letter.
Speez, I didn't find the letter I needed.
A few days ago Denza went though my mail. Maybe he has it.
Now excuse me while I go put my moves on GD
I don't know way GD gets all the guys. Other than the fact she likes to play "Flashy Boobies" for a quarter.

 

by Speez
11-10-01
Misty confronts Denza about the letter she wrote to Speez.
Hey Denza, did you happen to come across a letter I sent to Speez a few days ago.
Let me think...
Oh yeah, the one where you told your undying love to him.
OH MY GOD, YOU DO KNOW ABOUT IT! ACK, I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO KNOW!
Hey, can I show you a trick I can do with a hammer, some nails and a small woodland creature?

 

by Speez
11-10-01
So, um, how long did you get to read the letter?
Only a few seconds before I threw it away.
That's a relief. So you don't remember it?
No, I remember the whole thing. I have a photograhic memory.
Even the thing about the Two all beef patties speical sauce, lettuce, onions, pickles on a bun?
Yeah, you went into great detail with that. Can you fit that all up there?

 

by Speez
11-10-01
Youc an't tell anyone about that letter!
What if a be an ass and use it to black mail you?
Can I see the hammer and nails
Umm, here you go. And why?
Few moments later...
Don't Trust Anyone Denza. DTA.
Ok, you win! I will not tell anyone. Now I'm going to make the bad man stop and just end my life now.

 

by Speez
11-12-01
So, news for today, OGO has been banned for like the millionth time.
hmmm...
MY GOD! GD IS THINKING! I THINK HER HEAD IS GONNA BLOW!
I always wonder where ppl go when they get banned.
Come on OGO, all people who are banned have to go into my bag.
I ain't going in your stinking bag.

 

by Speez
11-12-01
OH MY GOD, WHAT IS THAT LAP!
Huh?
This is a low day in the life of LAP. OGO out smarted me.

 

by Speez
11-12-01
My god! OGO is loose on the boards! I have to tell CP right away!
I can't let anything stop me. Strait to CP, and nothing else.
SQUIRREL!!!!!!!
Is it me or did it just get dumber all of a sudden?

 

by Speez
11-13-01
Hey LAP...
It's squirrel...me...like....squirrel!
...I've always wondered...
NO...must....tell CP...OGO.....is on....loose.
Is that your lips or are you always sticking your tounge out?
I have a strong ugre to step on a small woodland creature.

 

by Speez
11-13-01
I'm sick of your crap! That's it, I'm going Super Squirrel on your ass!
Super Squirrel?????
AAAAAAARGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
I think I just wet myself.
Your going down LAP!
It ain't just wet down there now.

 

by Speez
11-13-01
I'm sick of your crap. Stuffing poor unsupecting squirrels in your bag? You think your god? Well, one of us have step up and will take you down!
Wait, this reminds me of something...
For years squirrels, as well as any female human, ran from the sight of LAP. They were both afraid. The squirrels of your bag, and the ladies of you, umm, "bag".
Evil tyrant....surpressing a "lower" race....and I ain't talking about CP and the UBCS.
But after after 1000 years, a Super Squirrel finally emerges to take you down. Now, I have to scream for a long time.
It's DBZ. Right down to the insane amount of talking.

 

by Speez
11-13-01
It's a fight you want! Well, I'm warning you, this bag can do some freaky (stuff)!
Bring it clown!
The battle rages out of control.
Hey, hey, you can't use the ax to cut that!
Says who?!?!
Had enough yet?
I'm just warming up!

 

by Speez
11-25-01
Board mod DJ sees the destruction that ILC and LAP are causing.
My god, I could use my powers as board mod to stop this mess.
Or...
Hell with it, I'll just tell CP about it and he can take care of it.

 

by Speez
11-25-01
Outside CP's room.
I finally made my way to CP's room.
Ian, what are you doing in CP's room?
Umm, I left my underwear in there.
Oh.........my...........GOD!

 

by Speez
11-25-01
Inside CP's room.
Oh my god, what happen here?
Either someone used bombs to break in and kidnapp CP or...
...CP was eating beans again.

 

by Speez
11-25-01
The two board mods (this comic takes place before I become a board mod) of the where abouts of CP.
So, he's room was totally wrecked?
Yes it was.
Are you sure he didn't eat beans?
Not completly. Hey, why are we talking so close to each other.
Did anyone ever tell you that you have pretty eyes.
Yeah been hanging around Ian, huh?

 

by Speez
11-25-01
You think we should go looking for CP?
No, he just had really bad gas, then maybe went to get some pie.
Meanwhile, in some dark shack somewhere in the middle east, CP is tied and blindfold to a chair.
Umm, help?

 

by Speez
11-25-01
Pretend the voice is coming from out of the picture. And remember, CP is tied up and blindfolded. Ugh, why does my head hurt?
Hahahahahaha!
Who's there?
I knocked you out with a drug after I blow up your room.
Man, why does my ass hurt?
Umm, you fell on a broom stick.

 

by Speez
11-25-01
DJ gets a letter.
Hmm, what's this.
If you ever want to see CP again, you must shut down the board.
Haha, stupid guy, only CP can shut down the board.

 

by Speez
11-25-01
CP is still tied up and blindfolded...
Hahahahaha!
Who are you?
It's me! Hey, aren't you surprised?
Ummm...
What is it?
I can't see you. You never took the blind fold off.

 

by Speez
11-25-01
CP is tied up, the blindfold is off...
No, not you!
Yes, it's me!
Just one thing...
...who the hell are you?

 

by Speez
11-25-01
I'm PokeMaster Kevin!
My god...
...your the guy who cruelly controls his boards that are growing to fast to pay for and probably mad that I been gaining all your memebers.
All that, and hey look, i have a thing with three points.
Yeah, I never noticed that before.

 

by Speez
11-25-01
Yeah, I'm mad that your board is growing so fast and taking my members.
Yeah, what are you gonna do?
I'm going to bring back the "broom stick".
HOLY CRAP, SOMEONE HELP!!!!!!!!!

 

by Speez
11-25-01
Time for Mr. Broom Stick
SOMEONE HELP!
What, something burst though the wall!
Did someone call for help?
This day just gets weirder.

 

by Speez
11-27-01
Remember, The Great Speez is not a board mod yet.
I've been here for over a week? UBCS is probably dead by now. Why did I ever make Ace and DJ board mods? Quick, I need a PC to check on the board.
I have a PC stored in my ass.
Really?
Oh sure, all superheros do. Let me pull down my pants.

Showing page 2.

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