All comics by forbus

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by forbus
6-04-07
So that's the problem.
You're long dead Pac-Man.
Squigle... Squigle..?

 

by forbus
7-14-07
Welcome to heaven.
Cool...... Is there sex in heaven?
Sure, All marrages are null and void. You get to start all over with whatever relationships you like.
OK, so are there any goats around?
You want a goat?
I thought you knew everything?

 

by forbus
7-14-07
Mohammed is killing me in the recruitment's this year.
It's that 72 virgins offer?
How does he live up to that promise? Where is he getting 72 virgins for every one who signs up?
Third world AIDS babies.
That's sneeky.
I do work in mysterious ways.

 

by forbus
7-14-07
Perhaps I can have my own incentives program?
And just where do you plan on getting all of the necessary virgins?
How about a volunteer "amnesty from hell" program?
Reinstating their virginity might be a problem.
But, think of the over crowding problem it would help.
I knew my son was a clever one.

 

by forbus
7-14-07
There are still some marketing issues to deal with.
Yes, the number of virgins needs to be a magic one.
How about seven?
Against 72? I understand offering 777 is not practical. 666 would be a bad choice.
Well, I can offer quality over quantity.
So, after the generation of Madonna wanna-be's, we get the generation of Paris Hilton wann-be's. Go Joe Francis go......

 

by forbus
7-14-07
The next problem will be getting the word out about this new offer.
Yes, having even the sales associates.... errr, Pastors of the Mega Churches pitch an offer like that would be out of place.
What about John Edward? It's got built in plausable deniability.
That's true. But I'm thinking about a more direct approach to our target market.
What then?
I give visions to U.S. Military recuiters.

 

by forbus
7-16-07
Son, I'm going to have to replace you as a tool for morality control.
And I was looking forward to the parade in the sky.
Well, in a technological society, I think a more direct system is need to keep people in line.
Do I get to meet the replacement?
Hey there, I'm Richard Johnson, Global Wide Insurance. I hear you are a good candidate for our HMO plan.
Oh, I see.

 

by forbus
7-17-07
Say there Jesus, have I got the shared risk product for you. Life Insurance.
You think I need to buy Life Insurance?
Why, we can even cover for any circumstance of early death. We even cover hanging and crucifixion by the State.
So, if I die, you will pay anyone I designate a lump sum payment just after I pass away.
Well, after a four day waiting period and exhumation of your body.
I see.

 

by forbus
8-03-07
Hello, Mr. God. I 'm Senator Hue Will Pucket. Well, maybe you should call me former Senator.
Yes, my son. Welcome to Heaven.
Down there I really enjoyed the game of Politics. Will I be able to participate in the politics of Heaven.
Sorry, no.
So what kind of government does Heaven have?
Communist. It's a one party system, with just 3 members.

 

by forbus
8-05-07
I went to work, paid my taxes, paid my bills, cared for my family.
And you prayed to me every day.
The doctors and science cured my wife of cancer.
And you prayed to me every day.
What was I praying for?
So I could take the credit.

 

by forbus
8-03-08
OK, I'm here. Let's get to work.
Why Jesus, this is a surprise. What brings you to our Church?
Well, I thought I could take care of some business. Pay the electric bill and mortgage. Check on how the congregation is doing.
Actually, I do all of those things. I mean, we pretty much do everything ourselves.
So, I'm not really necessary to the actual workings of the Church? I could be a work of fiction and it wouldn't make any difference?
Well, you did write a really nice book. On second though. You didn't actually write the Bible, some men did.

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