All comics by boorite

 

The Sheriff of Nut-in-Ham by boorite 8-09-07
So you call this place "Sure Wood."	Sherwood. And something about "Merry Meat."	Merry Men. Merry Man Meat.

 

Dreams are stupid by boorite 8-09-07
Wow, I can breathe underwater!	Imagine running into my high school girlfriend on the ocean floor!	On closer inspection, it's not her after all.

 

Artificial inelegance by boorite 8-09-07
Thank you for laying out my tactical stealth suit, Valetron!	Evildoers beware! Blindman AWAAAAAY!	*snicker*

 

A likely story by boorite 8-09-07
Goddamn stupid ATM! *kick kick* Halt, criminal!	the fu--? Come quietly or I will be forced to administer BLIND JUSTICE!	That's right, fucking a plucked chicken.

 

Motel 666 by boorite 8-09-07
Go check out that noise. If it's a burglar, throw the cat in his face and run. Will do.		It was just some kids in the pool. By the way, this thing can swim like a bastard.

 

Prepare lies ahead of time by boorite 8-15-07
No, sorry, I haven't seen your beloved family goat. I'll be happy to keep an eye out for it, though. Say, what are you packing into that orange crate?	Oh, you know, just some...	...tractor parts.

 

The office comedian in space

HEY! AH CAN SEE MAH HOUSE FROM HERE!

by boorite, 8-15-07

 

I just saved a bundle on my health insurance by boorite 8-15-07
Give it to me straight, Doc. Look at it this way. What could be worse than living in this post-apocalyptic hell?	Ball cancer? Bingo!	Usually, I'm shit at guessing. No, that was very good.

 

Why Timmy is afraid of squirrels

I'm sorry you had to see that.

by boorite, 8-15-07

 

You're welcome to stay for dinner by boorite 8-15-07
What are you doing? Shaving nutmeg.	Why do they call it that? Because it comes from nuts.	She's in the kitchen shaving her nuts.

 

IT'S INTERNETS COMIC WAR

I, MANDINGO, AM A CRAZY RETARDED PERSON WHO GIVES OFF AN OFFENSIVE ODOR! You have poop on your face!

by boorite, 8-20-07

 

Wake me up before you K-K by boorite 8-20-07
Shitty liberal East Coast elitist hotel.	I had to ASK for a third pillowcase!	I can't WAIT to get back to Arizona.

 

Starback Trekhouse by boorite 8-20-07
I AM TREVOR I WILL BE YOUR WAITER THIS EVENING CAN I START YOU OFF WITH SOME DRINKS AND FRIED BLOOMIN' ONION It appears to be trying to communicate.	UNABLE TO PROCESS INPUT PLEASE SPECIFY COMESTIBLE PREFERENCE It seems to be a core of organic composite sheathed in a layer of polycyclic hydrocarbon grease.	SO THAT'S ONE BLOOMIN' ONION

 

Habitat for Humility by boorite 8-20-07
Sorry I'm late. Let's get to-- holy shit! Ow!	Uh, you might want to turn the ha-- Fuck you! I know what I'm doing!	Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.

 

But I can order a burger at Burger King

I don't care what color of metal your card is, sir. You cannot order the Hooters. Get a lawyer.

by boorite, 8-20-07

 

Keepaway by boorite 8-23-07
God damn it!	Shit!	C'mon, guys, gimme Dad's head back!

 

Your mangina sir by boorite 9-06-07
Eet ees time already to shop the costume of Halloween! Ay dios mio! Por qué?	Last year I go to party of costume dressed as deranged butt freak who smell of the sewer! Ay ay ay! And what proceed?	THEY ASK WHERE EES MY COSTUME! O FORTUNA!

 

Random random by boorite 9-07-07
What the...? Weeee ssseeeeekssss Asssian ssschoolgirlsss for sssssecksssss		Konichiwa.

 

Dougan Comes Alive by boorite 1-10-12
OOH BABY I LOVE YOUR WHEY, EVERY DAY	WANNA TELL YOU I LOVE YOUR WHEY, EVERY DAY	WANNA SMEAR IT ON MY TOUPEE

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