All comics by ralahinn1

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by ralahinn1
4-01-20
-and now, a word from our sponsor -
There is trouble in our world-and while I know you too may be experienceing the bad times,it is now that we really need your help.
Hey,funny man,aren't you American ? Won't you be getting a "stimulus"check?
Yoicks !

 

At a local radio station-
I'm a world known financial advisor,and I want you to call me,and find out why other personalities call me "friend"
Brother,they call you "friend" because it's in the script .
by ralahinn1, 4-05-20

 

by ralahinn1
4-05-20
-and now,a word from our sponsor -
Here at "Donate a Doc",we help the undocumented migrant on their hard trip from their homeland to another land up north.
Couldn't that money be used to examine them,before they are turned over to ICE,and sent back to their homeland?
Yoicks !

 

Somewhere near DC- like a vulture circles -
We are sad to announce that Bernie Sanders is dropping out of the presidential race-
Bill ! Call Michelle,tell him we don't have to kill anyone this time-I'm going in!
by ralahinn1, 4-08-20

 

Some where in Eastertown,day before Easter -
Have a good night at work,baby. I'm expecting a big "carrot" when you get back,tee hee.
by ralahinn1, 4-11-20

 

by ralahinn1
4-17-20
I bet many people are having this dream recently-
Dad hasn't been able to relax lately,you know how he gets when Johnny recycles guests-
K' Boss,but I expect more pay for all the "extra work" lately.
Somewhere on this world-
Sure,the bar's closed, but I'm still taking bets-

 

by ralahinn1
4-17-20
I'm here for my "Covid-19 test.Does it includ an anal probe?
For,you,yes.
Faaabulous!
Tell your friends.

 

Is there any way to inject household disinfectant to clean out corona?
Sure, I've no problem with it.
by ralahinn1, 4-24-20

 

Whatcha got there,sport?
I filled out the census and sent it in. I got a letter back saying "bull shizz".
by ralahinn1, 4-25-20

 

I'm hoping this meeting plays out with Covid-19 soon-
Even though you weren't made by God,you had a good run. Time to go-that'll do,pig.That'll do.
by ralahinn1, 4-28-20

 

by ralahinn1
4-29-20
Killery endorses Joe Biden for President-
Thanks so much Hillery!
Now,pick me as your running mate,fool!
Burrr,did it get chilly suddenly?
No,Joe.And it's a pleasure to nominate you.

 

So, in fb jail again are we?
I tried posting the story of the mother in Wisconsin who was harrassed by police for lettering her child play at her neighbor's house.
by ralahinn1, 4-30-20

 

by ralahinn1
5-01-20
You cant make this stuff up-
I'm Maryland governor Larry Hogan.I bought 9 million dollars worth of corona virus test kits from Korea,and-
now they are in a "hidden"location,guarded by National Guard,and State Troopers,because I'm afraid the Fed.s will take them!

 

ral,look,you have another follower.
Thanks,kevinguy21333
by ralahinn1, 5-01-20

 

by ralahinn1
5-02-20
Gee,ral,you were in Facebook jail recently,what did you do?
I posted a comment on an article I shared,and Facebook admin didn't like it.Do you know they even monitor private messages?
No,we don't.
See?

 

by ralahinn1
5-07-20
In the days of "Social Distancing"-
I say,Percy,did you hear that the American IRS says that stimulus money sent to dead people must be returned?
Really? Are they turning in their voter cards too?

 

May 8,2020.Ocean City,Md. Is open again -
There goes the neighborhood.
by ralahinn1, 5-09-20

 

Happy Mother's day to all you Mothers out there-
by ralahinn1, 5-10-20

 

Heeeres Johnny -
Thanks, Ed.Tonight we have a whole hour of Jerry Stiller,and our musical guests are Little Richard, Betty Wright,and Andre Harrell.As they say in the bumper "More to come"
by ralahinn1, 5-11-20

 

Heard around Baltimore 10 minutes after the Democrat Mayoral debate starts, May 13,2020.
Junior,turn that shizz off.Someone should ax dem how many gift cards dey gonna steal in office dis time?
by ralahinn1, 5-13-20

 

This is happening in every state where prisoners are let out because of covid-
They let you out,and you are already back 5o your old ways-
I'm not doing anything wromg,officer. No one's home,so I'm practicing "Social Distancing",and see, I'm wearing a mask *smile*.
by ralahinn1, 5-16-20

 

by ralahinn1
5-19-20
And now,a word from our sponsor -
Here in the "far away"village,life is muchas it was 1000 years ago-
baaa?
Your gift of just $30 a month can bring these people to the modern age-
Hey funny man,your competition says $19 a month-
I have to have money for alcohol,after talking to people like you-
Have you tried the"native" alcohol from our stills yet?

 

The "aliens" invade,and as sad music plays-
Good lord,did we do this?Was it the pandemic of 2020?
No,its Baltimore.
by ralahinn1, 5-20-20

 

In a few days,President Trump will be visiting Fort McHenry in Baltimore, Maryland. This is what I imagine -
Well,hello there,little fellow -
I welcome you to the city,sir,as the city mascot and member of the democrats.You have done so much for us <3
by ralahinn1, 5-22-20

 

Look,Ral,another follower.
Thanks,Arbitrary,and Wb ^_^
by ralahinn1, 5-22-20

 

by ralahinn1
5-22-20
Hello, I'm a "Contact tracer"and I'm calling because your city health department would like some information.Question 1) Have you been tested,and what were the results?
In truth,I haven't gone for a test yet.
Question 2)Are you wearing "panties"?Uggnuggh-
What are you doing?Are you really working for the city?!

 

After one too many days in "Lockdown"-
Why are you looking at us like that, Tiger?
by ralahinn1, 5-24-20

 

On a street corner, somwhere in Baltimore-
Esss no fair,I worked so hard to come to America,and Meester Trump,he no give me the stimulus -
Dude,what part of "coming here illegally" you"no habla"?
by ralahinn1, 5-26-20

 

Somewhere in Baltimore -
Now,you go out there,boy,loot sumthing,make Dr.King proud.
First I'm not a "boy",Uncle.Second,it's Baltimore,who'd know?Third Dr.King woiuld abhor looting.
by ralahinn1, 5-30-20

 

by ralahinn1
6-01-20
- and nowI'm going to pay my respect to a very special place-
What's the status?
No protesting here,sir.All clean and ready.

 

by ralahinn1, 6-02-20

 

In the near future -
Lemmr lay it down for you.Leave yo door open,give me money an'let me have sex wi'yo woman,or ya'll racist.
I'm sorry I'm white.
by ralahinn1, 6-04-20

 

by ralahinn1
6-06-20
-and now,a word from our sponsor -
Yo,"Father's Day " is coming- sfter you trick the free clinic to do a few DNA tests-
- of your moms male friends to see who may be yo pops-
Use these "protests." to call up the crew and loot a few stores,to get something nice for you an your pops

 

by ralahinn1
6-09-20
Mr. Biden,sit down and relax. Enjoy the refreshments.
But I want to speak to "the people ".
Don't worry,you will. I was hired to make you look "dynamic"and give you a chance to get elected-
-then, a few months in, you can speak,and your VP will take over your duties.
Oh darn.

 

by ralahinn1
6-09-20
-and now,a word from our sponsor -
We have a new medication you should try,it helps prevent heart attack,stroke,and death-
Hello-
Well,maybe not death-

 

by ralahinn1
6-22-20
It's been a while since I've been here,but you need a new face to announce the murder rate in Baltimore, so like "Aunt Jemima", I'm taking a hike-
Dude, all the same to me. I've been spreading Covid love-
We now intrduce Satan's new partner -
I'm down for the struggle-
Nothing like someone ready to "represent"-

 

by ralahinn1
6-27-20
-and now,"You might have Covid if"-
The CDC recently added new symptoms for Covid. Prepare for today's contestants -
I'm having my first period, mom says you have to check me.
Covid,next-
-and now,"You might have Covid if"-
My Junk's itching.Can I get that cream you gave me last time?
Covid ,next-

 

Oh,look,ral,someone else is following you.
Thanks,strange universe <3
by ralahinn1, 6-27-20

 

This week, the Murder rate in Baltimore is 163. Go Team Baltimore.
Go Team Baltimore!
by ralahinn1, 6-29-20

 

by ralahinn1
7-08-20
Recently,a bunch of nuts tried to take over a church-
Did someone say "nuts"?
After this, I wwnt to go "burn som coal".
This is what a bunch of nuts looks like!
This is what a bunch of nuts looks like!
This is what a bunch of nuts looks like!
Oh my

 

This week the murder rate in Baltimore is 174
Go Team Baltimore!
by ralahinn1, 7-13-20

 

by ralahinn1
7-16-20
Recently on "Strip Creator.Com"
So, I told her I shut down the "non- donor " section to "get rid of spam".
Did she believe it? You could have just blocked the users who spammed-
Too much work-
Well, I don't think it was such a hot idea. I'll see you later.
Thanks Comrade, you had to do it. Too much "truth" was coming out. Now come with me for your money.

 

by ralahinn1
8-01-20
-and now,a word from our sponsor -
Don't have Covid, but feeling "blah"-
Want to legally take drugs?
Let us make up a disease for you. Using CDC like changing of symptoms in Covid,we can make an illness for you. Call for rates!

 

Welcom home,Ms.Ginsberg,the master will give you your intakeinterview personally.He's a fan of your work.
by ralahinn1, 9-18-20

 

Meanwhile- Biden and Harris makes sure they thank all those who voted for them-
Thank you.
Thank's Democrats
by ralahinn1, 11-06-20

 

The Biden campaign,earlier this week-
- and,if you vote for me, I'll give you a ham sandwich.
Can I haz 2?
by ralahinn1, 11-06-20

 

President Elect Biden,and VP Ellect Harris, go into a "hidden " room in a building in Pennsylvania -
OMG, I never realized there were so many un-counted Trump votes!
Now we got to get you out of here, and wait 5 minutes,so you can honestly tell the press you don't know of any "un-counted " votes,maybe you can nap now.. Thank Marx for your dementia,comrad.
by ralahinn1, 11-11-20

 

Say,did you hear, they are hand counting some of the votes.You worried?
Naw, I've been voting Democrat for years
by ralahinn1, 11-11-20

 

by ralahinn1
11-19-20
Oh, there's no place like a Homo for the holidays-
Oh, there's no place like a Homo for the holidays-
Uh,guys,you probably altrady know this,but that's not how the song goes

 

In a galaxy not so far away, they just learned David Prowse has died-
by ralahinn1, 11-29-20

Showing page 28.

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