All comics by Chuckaduck

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by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Chester: Well, looky here. If it ain't the balless man. Don't suppose your wife ever lets you see your testicles anymore, does she?
Married Autobot Chuck: Well hey there Mr. 'It's round. I'll fuckit!'. Caught any good STDs lately whorebag?
Chester: Wow. You seem rather chipper. Did someone mistakenly inform you you're a man or something?
Married Autobot Chuck: Clever! Did the slut that lowered herself to touch something like you teach you that one or did the easybake ovenlight flicker for a moment inside that melon?
Chester: Something is amiss here.
Married Autobot Chuck: Really? Are you wearing panties again?

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Chester: Who's the kid?
Married Autobot Chuck: My fro-sense is tingling! I'm sensing dignity, responsibility, and half a fucking clue. Hmm...
Chester: What the fark are you doing?
Married Autobot Chuck: Jinkies! That's it! I'll take things Chester doesn't have for four-motherfucking-hundred Alex!
Married Autobot Chuck: Now son, don't repeat the horrid language you hear while we're here. 'Kay?
Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck fuck fuck.

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Chester: Okay Ultra Dickless. If you suddenly got all the right replies to everything; If you're suppose to be a fucking Autobot, why can't you transform numbnut?
Married Autobot Chuck: Who said I couldn't?
Chester: Well fine then Mister 'I'm obviously the ugliest lesbian ever, and married to another lesbian, as it's apparent I have no male genitalia', let's see it!
Married Autobot Chuck: Done! CHUCK, TRANSFORM!
Yay! 100th strip!
Chester: You HAVE to be fucking kidding me.
Married Autobot Chuck: Not at all!

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Chester: A phone? A pathetic fucking phone? What do you do, sit there and let your old lady chat it up with friends & family like the testicless wonder you are?
Married Autobot Chuck: No, nothing like that Chester, Chester, the Child Molester. But I CAN call, say, that woman that works at the porn shop you 'claim' to work at.
Chester: Despite popular belief among Men-with-vaginas, I DO have a job.
Married Autobot Chuck: But ONLY because the woman's blind and therefore can stand to take the snotty end of a fuckstick from the likes of a perversion like you and ergo tolerates your 'schedule'.
Chester: Asshole!
Married Autobot Chuck: Please, no details! HEY! Let's give her a call, shall we?!

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Chester: You wouldn't dare!
Married Autobot Chuck: Shh. She's picking up. Care to hear an impersonation?
Chester: Don't do it!
'Chester's Voice': Ms. Jism? Hi, it's Chester. I'm going to be out sick for the next month. I've gotten a severe case of anal-glaucoma.
Chester: Please stop!
'Chester's Voice': 'What's that', you ask? I can't see my ass coming into work.

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Chester: Quit doing this to me!
'Chester's Voice': No Ms. Jism, it's not that I don't want to work, it's that I can no longer stand taking my shrimp boat to your tuna town.
Chester: I'll kill you!
Married Autobot Chuck: She hung up. Wow. I think she's angry.
Chester: Must...kill...you......
Married Autobot Chuck: Relax grusome. I yankin' yer chain. I don't even know the phone number to that stupid place. Though I COULD look it up....

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Chester: Fine. Idiotic point fucking taken. You're not helpless as a phone. Big whoop. It's still a pathetic thing to change into.
Married Autobot Chuck: Don't touch that child, er, DIAL just yet bucko! I'm a triple-changer scumbag.
???
Married Autobot Chuck: Checkit! CHUCK, TRANSFORM!
Chester: A phone and a rocket. Brilliant.
Married Autobot Chuck: I sense sarcasm... ..wait, no... ....it's jealousy!

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Chester: Anything else in your dumb bag'o'tricks?
Married Autobot Chuck: Well sure! I'm also a Pretender.
Chester: Yeah I know. You're quite good at pretending to be male.
Married Autobot Chuck: Fucker. MATRIXPRETENDERSHELL!
Chester: Yes. Intimidating... ...friggin' pansy.
Married Pretender Shell Chuck: What?

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Low Self-Esteem Whore: Ooo, yeah. Give it to me good big daddy.
This is what I needed. To forget about assmuncher for bit and watch Facials & Rimmings 3. It's not new, but it's got restrokable value.
News Anchor: We interupt your memory of Facials & Rimmings 3 to bring you a special report.
Farmer Chuck: What the crap?
News Anchor: We're about to bring you a live report from a Chuck claiming the infamous Farmer Chuck is gay!
Farmer Chuck: What!?!

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Don't look at me folks.
News Anchor: We take you to Frivolous Reporter. And when we come back the film crew will be doing upskirt shots of me under the desk.
Frivolous Reporter: I'm here with a man who has identified themself as Luvs-the-Cock and nothing more. We suspect him to be another personality of Chuck but who, we do not know. Sir?
Luvs-the-Cock: I've been having a secret affair with Farmer Chuck for a couple of years now.
? ? ? ? ? ?
Frivolous Reporter: And why have you come forward now?
Luvs-the-Cock: I think it's time he fessed up to his ways.

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Luvs-the-Cock: The way he tongues my nuts, it's lickalicious!
Farmer Chuck: Dead man! Whoever the fuck that is, is a DEAD MAN!
Luvs-the-Cock: It's not a matter of I think what we do is right or wrong, I just think he shouldn't hide his ways!
Luvs-the-Cock: Just the other day I busted a nut on his...
Farmer Chuck: Dead man!

 

by Chuckaduck
2-25-05
Hey peeps. You ever get really drunk and stoned at a party when you were a teenager...
Frivolous Reporter: I'm on site where a confession from a partner in a secret relationship has turned into an apparent lover's quarrel.
Farmer Chuck: Bullshit!
...then wake up the next day and have to be told everything you did with invovled but was not limited to sleeping with the school's biggest cheerleading slut?
Farmer Chuck: AHA!
.... ..... .. .....why the hell did I ever quit drinking again?
Frivolous Reporter: WTF?
Unit Lee: Err, pay not attention to the robot folks...

 

by Chuckaduck
2-28-05
For the record, I'm an excellent care-giver to my child.
Should I tell him? If so, now or later? Should I wait for him to find out himself?
Married Autobot Chuck: Okay, fine. My Pretender mode needs work. Stop staring at me like a jackass, 'kay?
Remember that, please.
Chester: Your son's gone.
Married Autobot Chuck: Is that some form of insult I'm not up to date with or something, because I... ...um.... ....
This would never happen. I'm too protective. FYI.
....... ....... .. ..... .. ..... .. . .... . ... ... .... ......... .....FUCK!

 

by Chuckaduck
2-28-05
Chester: *Snicker* You lost your boy.
Married Autobot Chuck: I did not lose him! He wandered off! It wouldn't have happened if you had just left me alone!
Chester: Sure, place the blame elsewhere. Who are YOU to have responsibilities, eh? Tsk, tsk.
Married Autobot Chuck: Shut it oaf! You're no one to judge another person!
Chester: You beat him don't you.
Married Autobot Chuck: Silence or be annihilated! And no I don't!!

 

by Chuckaduck
2-28-05
Our hero struggles through the fact his son has just gone missing.
Chester: Do you want me to help you find him?
Married Autobot Chuck: You'd do that?
Chester: Not a chance! I just wanted to see if a high amount of sudden stress would lax your reasoning when it came to judging reality. Apparently it did.
Married Autobot Chuck: Gonorrhea can grow in warm, moist areas like the reproductive tract, mouth, throat, & anus. Common symptoms in men include burning when peeing and painful or swollen nuts.
HA! Nice.
Chester: Wait. Why did you say that? Do you know something?
Married Autobot Chuck: I've got to find my boy. Good luck to you!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-01-05
I had no idea there were such glorious vistas in my father's mentalscape.
I know he'll worry, but I simply must locate this 'Farmer Chuck' and have words with him. My father's sanity may be at stake.
Unfortunately for me this area is looking heavily void of people. Directions must be obtained!
Dark Chuck: OBLITERATION AWAITS ALL!!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-01-05
Mateo the Great: Am who might you be?
Dark Chuck: THE DESTROYER OF INFIDELS!! THE ONE WHO ALL CHUCKS DRAW THEIR DARKNESS FROM!! I AM VENGEANCE!! I AM THE NIGHT!! I AM, ER, WAIT. NEVERMIND THAT LAST BIT!!
Mateo the Great: Intriguing. Father's inner personalities, while of a uniqueness on their own, pull aspects from all others. What a intricate web. I had no idea.
Dark Chuck: SCREAM IN TERROR CHILD!! I AM THE DARK CHUCK!!
Mateo the Great: Desist at once with your yelling or be crushed.
Dark Chuck: I'M SORRY!! I CAN'T HELP IT!!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-01-05
Mateo the Great: So what, may I ask, is the significance of the yelling?
Dark Chuck: IT'S INHERENT!! IT ALSO STRIKES FEAR INTO THE HEARTS OF THE WEAK!!
Mateo the Great: Have you considered other work?
Dark Chuck: YES BUT NOTHING HAS PANNED OUT!! NO ONE CAN WITHSTAND WHAT I HAVE TO SAY!! MY VERY VOICE DRIVES THEM TO MADNESS!!
Mateo the Great: Telemarketing?
Dark Chuck: TELEMARKETING!!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-01-05
Mateo the Great: As much as it would be enjoyable to stay and chat; May I ask for directions of ye?
Dark Chuck: OF COURSE MORTAL!! YOUR FORTITUDE IN MY PRESENCE IS AWESOME!! ASK!!
Mateo the Great: Might you point me in the direction that I could find a personality named 'Farmer Chuck'?
...
Mateo the Great: Did you not hear?
Dark Chuck: OH!! YES, I HEARD!! I JUST HAD A MOMENTARY BRAIN FART AS THE CLEAVAGE ON THAT YOUNG WOMAN FROM FLORIDA WHO IS READING THIS DISTRACTED ME!!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-01-05
Dark Chuck: THE MAN YOU SEEK LIES BEYOND THE CITY ON THE HORIZON YOU SEE THERE!!
Mateo the Great: My thanks to you sir. I'll be taking my le...
Dark Chuck: CAN I COME TOO!?!
Mateo the Great: Um. Well. It is not that I...
Dark Chuck: PLEASE!?! I'M BORED AND A NEW EPISODE OF TWENTY-FOUR DOESN'T COME ON FOR ANOTHER WEEK!! A FRIGGING WEEK!!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-01-05
Mateo the Great: But I have a nagging fear if I do not intervene the land of Chuckdom could be tossed into insane chaos.
Mateo the Great: And that, good sir, is why I must locate this 'Farmer Chuck'.
The Chuck of Days Past: Killer. One question.
The Chuck of Days Past: Where does the tentacle faced dick breathing down my rotted neck come into play?
Dark Chuck: HAVE I OBLITERATED YOU BEFORE!?!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
The Chuck of Days Past: Little man, I'd be happy to help. I'm glad to see that Autobot I put in charge is doing so well. Imagine, Chuck, a son. Married, for crying out loud!
The Chuck of Days Past: Just pass through the city, beware of the recently wrecked zone, and head due West. I'll even distract squid face here so you can leave.
Dark Chuck: INSOLENT ASS!! I AM TO BE RESPECTED FOR MY MIGHT!!
Mateo the Great: My thanks to you. You'll save me the task of having to destroy him myself.
The Chuck of Days Past: Hmm. Son. Awesome shit.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
The Chuck of Days Past: Take care little guy!
Dark Chuck: I DO NOT WISH TO STAY HERE WITH THE LIKES OF YOU!!
The Chuck of Days Past: Tough shit y'whiney bitch. Just because I'm dilapidated doesn't mean I can't put a hurt on you if you don't chill the fuck out.
Dark Chuck: I WAS NOT MEANT TO SIT QUIETLY AT THE COMMAND OF OTHERS!! I WAS MEANT TO RULE ALL!!
The Chuck of Days Past: My, that's quite the complex you've got there.
Dark Chuck: YOU'RE NOT EXACTLY MODEST YOURSELF LOWLY DOG!!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
I can't believe he wandered off like that! He's such a good boy, it's unheard of!
Perhaps some fuck has kidnapped him. Maybe that slacker has some part in this.
Untainted Hooker: Robo Nerd! Now ready for luvluv?
I did NOT just hear that.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
Untainted Hooker: Robo Nerd want one Oral B? Sloopy doopy in the poopy? Game of handjacking toothpaste squirter?
Married Autobot Chuck: Stop! Stop with the horrid sexgame names already!
Married Autobot Chuck: I will not have sex with you! I'm a married man and despite this pathetically loose day & age that still means something to me!
Untainted Hooker: But me good for luvins. Have much powpow in hips.
Married Autobot Chuck: AAHH!!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
Untainted Hooker: Why Robo Nerd not want sweet meats between powpow hips?
Married Autobot Chuck: Is it a self-respect thing? Are you trying to fill some void the past has put inside you?
Untainted Hooker: We talking about same thing.
Married Autobot Chuck: Fuck all. Just, I dunno... ...fine, make your butt jiggle in thong.
Untainted Hooker: I make butt jiggle in thong!
Married Autobot Chuck: Yes, yes. Very nice. Go you.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
Rebelling Anti-Religion Atheist: Religion is a crutch for the mentally weak!
Rebelling Anti-Religion Atheist: I will not conform to any society! I plan to get a tatoo that shows how anti-establishment I am!
Mateo the Great: Just like everyone else doing the same thing?
Rebelling Anti-Religion Atheist: Yes! Er, wait...

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
If you're anti-religion, fine.
Rebelling Anti-Religion Atheist: Religious beliefs are unfounded! Their followers have no right to tell others what to do!
If you're an atheist (and they are different), hey, whatever floats your boat.
Mateo the Great: From their perspective their beliefs do have solid foundations that can be backed up. Everyone's got the same evidence, it's the interpretation that's different.
Rebelling Anti-Religion Atheist: They have no right to tell others what to do! They should not dictate stupid religious fluff to people!
This is just spiteful ramblings in regards to a ten year old with a nose ring I had to hear squawk in the mall the other day. He needed practice.
Mateo the Great: They should listen to others telling them what to do and not tell others what to do. As well they should stop saying beliefs to people because of other people saying beliefs to them.
Rebelling Anti-Religion Atheist: Yes! Wait, what?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
Mateo the Great: You need to work on your beliefs and not rely on screaming a t-shirt slogans.
Rebelling Anti-Religion Atheist: Eat me half pint!
Jesus: *Ahem*
Mateo the Great: ?? Oh, hello there kind sir.
~Fin~
Jesus: Please stop.
Mateo the Great: Check.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
Married Autobot Chuck: Excuse me, has a little baby strolled through here recently.
Skiddish Chuck: No! I don't know anything! Please don't hurt me!
Married Autobot Chuck: Drat, I must be on the wrong track. Why would I hurt you?
Skiddish Chuck: Aren't you President Bush?
Married Autobot Chuck: What?! No! Fuck no! Why would you think that?!
Skiddish Chuck: Not Bush?! *Whew* I thought maybe he was coming after that quart of oil I bought yesterday.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-02-05
Oops...
Married Autobot Chuck: Excuse me, has a little baby strolled through here recently.
Skiddish Chuck: No! I don't know anything! Please don't hurt me!
Married Autobot Chuck: Drat, I must be on the wrong track. Why would I hurt you?
Skiddish Chuck: Aren't you President Bush?
Married Autobot Chuck: What?! No! Fuck no! Why would you think that?!
Skiddish Chuck: Not Bush?! *Whew* I thought maybe he was coming after that quart of oil I bought yesterday.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-07-05
Married Autobot Chuck: So, you're not a fan of Bush?
Skiddish Chuck: SHH! Don't say that! They could be listening!
Married Autobot Chuck: Who?
Skiddish Chuck: The people working for Bush!
Married Autobot Chuck: Hmm. Yes. Lord knows they've been so on top of things in the past.
Skiddish Chuck: ... .... ....you have a point.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-07-05
George W. Bush Jr. is the biggest piece of shit on the face of the Earth.
Married Autobot Chuck: So, why the focus on Bush?
Skiddish Chuck: WHY!?! How could I not fear a money-grubbing terrorist who is in charge of the US?!?
I'm not saying I hope he is assassinated. I'm saying when's the last good one we had?
Married Autobot Chuck: Yes. It is frightening.
Skiddish Chuck: We're all gunna die.
Fuck him. Fuck that rotten bastard to hell.
Married Autobot Chuck: Rattrap reference. Nice.
Skiddish Chuck: Who?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-07-05
The MattMan character is based on a realife person named Matt. He has a blood disorder called hemofelia.
Married Autobot Chuck: Exuse me for a moment Skids. I feel the breath of an idiot behind me.
Skiddish Chuck: Okay. Please don't call me Skids.
Thanks to the efforts of 'W' Matt has had medical plan after medicinal support canceled and been forced to find another with haste.
Married Autobot Chuck: Yes?
Matt is only one handi-cap classed individual that has been affected by 'W'. Eat shit Bush.
Bush Supporter: You shouldn't talk bad about George W. Bush Jr. He's just a man who has his own beliefs. Different from yours, but still he is willing to stand up for them. He also ran for Congress.
Married Autobot Chuck: Beliefs? Money, oil, and looking out for the upper crust of US society. Check. He also lost his in his running for Congress.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-07-05
Bush Supporter: I hate listening to 'liberal' whining.
Married Autobot Chuck: Because Lord knows you shouldn't have to hear something bad about the first president in US history to enter office with a criminal record.
Bush Supporter: Um...
Married Autobot Chuck: Why should you have to be aware of Bush's connection to the people behind the 9/11 attack? No reason for you to be bothered...
Married Autobot Chuck: ...with the fact that he squeezes every ounce possible from the worst day in America's home history to his advantage. Poor fool. Having to endure reality.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-07-05
Bush Supporter: He's just trying to help his people.
Married Autobot Chuck: Like his apparent concern that invalids are losing what vital medical support they need to live.
Bush Supporter: He'll make this country better. We need not worry about the economy under his administration.
Married Autobot Chuck: Yes, he did so well with that oil company he had. Couldn't find oil... ...in Texas... ...went bankrupt. But that's over thanks to taking over the middles eastern oil fields!
Bush Supporter: Wait...
Married Autobot Chuck: Nothing like having a man that spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury as well as shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history in charge of things, eh?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-07-05
Bush Supporter: You MUST be a democrat.
Married Autobot Chuck: Nope.
Bush Supporter: ....... ....how can you dislike Bush but not be a democrat?
Married Autobot Chuck: I dunno. How can you have reality shitting in your mouth and still think Bush is the be all of great?
Bush Supporter: gave millions of people hope, and pride to be an American citizen, to be alive.
Married Autobot Chuck: By making a sympathy play off of a terrorist attack he had prior warning about but ignored while on 'vacation' during the month of August. Go Bush.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-07-05
Bush Supporter: You're just hateful for religious people.
Married Autobot Chuck: I'm a Christian.
Bush Supporter: Impossible! If you really were you would support Bush! He found God!
Moron, a vote for Bush doesn't mean a vote for God or something. There are followers out there that need not automatically lump themselves in some people pile just because that's where the majority is
Bush Supporter: But...
Married Autobot Chuck: The people that voted for him for your provided reason are those that dump money into evangelists just because their a well-known. If you think he's righteous, fuck you dumbass.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-07-05
Bush Supporter: You need to stop talking about Bush like he's some dictator.
Married Autobot Chuck: Even though he's been quoted as stating it would be preferable and it's pretty much the next best thing in his hands right now?
Bush Supporter: You gave part of your responsibility over your own life to someone else.
Married Autobot Chuck: Not 'W'.
Bush Supporter: He has the hard task to do a lot of things that affect your life & happiness. You should be very grateful for him to take on some of that responsibility. He is doing you a huge favor.
Grateful? Of what? What was the favor he did by ignoring a report on EXACTLY what happend on 9/11? How does cutting vital healthcare to invalids & terminal people give cause for them to be grateful?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-08-05
Bush Supporter: If you, for some reason, believe Bush to be evil, you should have voted for the lesser evil?
Married Autobot Chuck: 'Kay, first; I did. Second, LESSER EVIL? I could have sworn the other major candidate was named 'Kerry', not 'Satan Incarnate'.
Bush Supporter: Kerry is a flip-flopper.
Married Autobot Chuck: Why? Because he originally agreed to a conflict, but after seeing the amount of mindless destruction he opted for an end?
Bush Supporter: Yes.
Married Autobot Chuck: Congradulations dimwit. You've labeled Bush Jr.'s father as such as well.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-08-05
Being negative about the W is about as difficult a task as breathing.
Bush Supporter: He's trying to help the U.S.
Married Autobot Chuck: In his first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their jobs. He also cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in US history.
You don't even have to remember to do it.
Bush Supporter: I think it's great we have a president with some real business savy.
Married Autobot Chuck: He presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed namely because they were business associates of his.
If you are a Bush supporter or care for what he has done, you do not know the facts and/or are unwilling to face them.
Bush Supporter: Um...
Married Autobot Chuck: First president in US history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously go bankrupt. And, um, HOW many companies run by him went under before his reign as president?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-08-05
Bush Supporter: He's only started the war to spread freedom to the world.
Married Autobot Chuck: By dissolving more international treaties than any president in US. He's also the 1st president in US history to order a US attack & military occupation of a sovereign nation.
Bush Supporter: But...
Married Autobot Chuck: He's also the 1st president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the human rights commission and the elections monitoring board.
Bush Supporter: Wait...
Not only has he rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant he's removed more checks & balances, & has the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US history.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-08-05
Please forgive wrongly facing peeps...
Bush Supporter: He's helping the folks fighting the war.
Married Autobot Chuck: Oh please. He cut healthcare benefits for war veterans and some them still supported him! It's also only recently that troops are being properly equipped.
...as well as typos & not being able to stay tried & true to starting every verbal balloon with the name of the person speaking.
Bush Supporter: How...
Married Autobot Chuck: He also withdrew from the World Court of Law refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and by default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions. Fucking genius.
Kind of rushing through. Promise to try harder. Domo arigato.
Bush Supporter: You're just hateful of Southerners and Texans.
Married Autobot Chuck: I'm both. Eat me you mindless twit. There is no existing reason for your support of Bush. You're a moron for doing so, and worthless for proclaiming him great.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-08-05
Bush Supporter: He's proud to be an American fighting for the freedom of people.
Married Autobot Chuck: He's also the first US president to run and hide when USA came under attack. THEN he later lied, saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1.
Bush Supporter: Er....
Married Autobot Chuck: Must have gotten that idea off of his Happy Meal box. Also loved how he sat doing nothing during the inital parts of the 9/11 attack. Go Bush.
Bush Supporter: He's a good man.
In that he claims to be a man of God & yet does horrid things? What about his cocaine use or conviction for drunk driving? How about having his driving history erased? That he went AWOL in wartime?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-08-05
Bush Supporter: I still believe he is the best president for us now.
Married Autobot Chuck: Then you have no problem telling me exactly why with information and past events. Aaaaaaaaand, go!
Bush Supporter: ...............
Married Autobot Chuck: Yes?
Bush Supporter: He's a great man.
Married Autobot Chuck: I hope stupidity becomes inherently deadly by those whom have it. Then the world can get on with things without sewage like you and 'W'. Excuse me, I've got to go find my boy.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-08-05
Mateo the Great: This must be path that zombie fellow spoke of. My quest is proceeding quite nicely.
Mateo the Great: I cannot help contemplating what may have happened to this area. It's been decimated thoroughly.
Mateo the Great: Greetings!
Ultra Smooth Chuck: Oh shit. You're not, like, looking for your long lost father or any shit like that, are you? Because you're not mine.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-08-05
Mateo the Great: I'm seeking to speak with a man named 'Farmer Chuck'.
Ultra Smooth Chuck: *Whew* Close one there. What, did he knock up your mom or something.
Mateo the Great: Iknau zemius! Wrektho ra!
Mateo the Great: Speak not as such in regards to my mother, degenerate.
Ultra Smooth Chuck: G....kck..... ... .ah... ....pl.. pl.... ...rrr..

 

by Chuckaduck
3-09-05
This is horrible! I MUST find my boy! Poor little guy, just wandering out there. I bet he's scared now. How can I even know if I'm going the right way!?!
Married Autobot Chuck: ... ...... .. ....Crap! Not YOU again!
Nancy: Have I offended?
Married Autobot Chuck: Forget it! I'm not going into with you. Have you seen my boy?
Nancy: Hmm, *Guh*... ...whoa. That was a good one. Felt kind of wet though.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-09-05
Amendment: In a recent strip attacking Satan's cousin, 'W', I mispelled the name of the blood disorder Hemophilia while rushing through.
Married Autobot Chuck: How can you just stand there and soil yourself?
Nancy: How can I not? Oh, now I'm pissing. It's warm.
Matt has commented on the piece and threatened my life for my mistake. He is a danger to all when angered.
Married Autobot Chuck: Don't you know how to use a fucking toilet!?!
Nancy: A what?
He has an oar, so I'm making a public apology. I fear for my life. Can I sleep at your house tonight?
Married Autobot Chuck: Screw this, I'm going the wrong way. MATRIXGETTHEFUCKOUT!!!
Nancy: Ooo! That breeze is making my piss-soaked pants cold! What a chill!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-10-05
???
THE FRO: You should not be here.
Married Autobot Chuck: AAAAHH!!!
THE FRO: The agenda cannot be altered.

Showing page 3.

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