All comics by eggy_mcmuffinman

 
These are some really crappy buildings.
Yup.

 
Trippy.

 

Stripcreator sucks!
Now, Holly, I really think you should think before you say something like that. Stripcreator has many adv-
Holy crap! your hair and shoe is sticking out of the panel!
Score one for the kid with the pigtails.

 

OHMIGOD! It's Peter Gabriel! I'm your biggest fan!
I've been to all your concerts and bought all your albums and seen all your videos at least twelve times...
I know. you've been stalking me for the past two weeks.
Sign my face.

 

Hey you're that guy from those comics on stripcreator! Will you sign me an autograph?
Sure!
Make it out to Katy from Detroit.
There ya go.
Now do it 70 000 times.
Eat me.

 

I need money.
I need a willing lab assistant who can endure excruciating torture.
I need money.
Hippie.

 

Hey, if we're in these comics so much, why aren't we paid for it?
Uh oh.

 

And it seems both Grey and our new character Katy have gone on strike.
This means I will be doing double duty, comedy-wise.
So prepare yourself for the hilarious comedic stylings of...me!
At least I still have my self-respect.

 

I like to move it, move it.
I like to move it, move it.
I like to move it, move it.
I like to move it, move it.
Oh, the humanity.
I like to move it, move it.
I like to move it, move it.

 

Even if the other characters are on strike, we'll be doing a countdown to the 120th Eggy Mcmuffinman comic.
And by "we", I mean me and the invisible narrator.
I'm watching you.
Stupid invisible narrator.

 

This is so cool! I've never been on strike before. Except for when I worked at that fast food restaurant.
Why?
Oh...various reasons.
Urge to kill...rising...
...But make sure the lettuce isn't too soggy, and toast the buns and replace the ketchup with mayonnaise...

 

I'd like to book this boat for a party please.
You're from stripcreator, aren't you?
Yes indeed I am.
This was a bad idea.

 

Where should I have that big anniversary party?
We'll need the perfect place, something classy but not too snobbish.
And something tells me prison isn't it.

 

So what'll happen if the author doesn't give in to our demands?
Oh, he will.
How do you know?
Just trust me.
Meanwhile...
Ask popsicle man!
Can't...feel...my...legs!

 

 

Just so you know, that last comic was a mistake.
Or was it?
Um, actually it was.
oh. right.

 

God bless America!
Otherwise, who will?

 

Look, being on strike is cool and all, but I need something to pay the bills.
Last time I checked, McDonald's was hiring.
You're kidding, right?
She wasn't kidding.
At least HERE they still call them french fries.

 

May I take your order?
I'll have a Happy Meal please.
You realize that it's neither happy nor a meal, right?
And that's how I got fired.
Bummer.

 

Welcome to our fun-tastic, knock-your-socks-off, super-duper 120th comic bash!
*sob*

 
I just remembered: this comic sucks.
Oh yeah...

 

Hello. We here at Eggy Mcmuffinman would like to take a moment to apologize for some of the mistakes we made during our brief yet illustrious run.
Wow. I guess we're just plain lucky!
Or incredibly stupid.

 

Wait a minute, weren't you supposed to be on strike?
Was I?
(insert hilarious ice-breaking punchline here)
Oh dear God, he's speaking in parentheses!

 

So...
Is it over?
I guess so.
Thank God.

 

Ashes to ashes, dust to -
SHUT THE HELL UP!

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-14-03
Oh sweet Jesus, not again.
Here, let me help.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-14-03
Why are we on a boat?
My guess is it's a setup for a lame joke.
Aside from that, I mean.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-16-03
You know, Phil Collins wasn't ALWAYS a pox on humanity...
Oh, don't start that again.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-23-03
Put on some pants.
Never.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-23-03
What's on the agenda today?
Well, we'll have one panel of dialogue, followed by an awkward pause, finishing with some ironic, self-referential remarks
Do you ever question the worth of your own existence?
All the time.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-23-03
And now, I'm pleased to present the newest addition to our stable of characters: Death Squirrel!
Tell us a little about yourself.
I'm trained in all forms of murder!
That's...interesting.
Guess how many heads you can fit in a duffel bag! Go on, guess!

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-23-03
Did I mention that I've been to prison twelve times?
Yes, unfortunately.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-23-03
My God, you have huge eyes!

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-23-03
You know, I don't think this one would've made sense even if it did have a punchline.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-23-03
Hey Grey, long time no see!
Who exactly are you?
I'm Bill Bloober. I went to high school with you.
Doesn't ring a bell.
I was the one who could fit 57000 marshmallows in his mouth.
Oh yeah...

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-24-03
So what have you been up to lately?
Oh, the usual.
Which is?
Oh.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
11-24-03
Hey, isn't that Ernie, former captain of the football team?
Yup.
The one who'd always get the prettiest girls and drive the fanciest cars?
Yup.
Do you think they'll ever find his face?
Nope.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-19-03
Hey, I'm done watching all the Lord Of The Rings movies back to back!
Dude, you were gone almost a month.
Oh, that's because I forgot to blink and all the fluid in my eyes dried up so I had to go to the hospital.
No one understands me.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-19-03
What up?
Word.
What up?
Sometimes when I can't dispose of a corpse, I eat it.
Have I ever told you how much I hate this place?
Word.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-19-03
My name is Cuban Pete, I'm the craze of the rhumba b-
BOOM!
I take it God doesn't like to mambo.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-19-03
Excuse me, why am I in hell?
Oh, this isn't hell, it's purgatory.
Then what's with the fire and brimstone?
Oh, that's not brimstone. Our Easy-Bake oven exploded.
Really?
Nah, I'm just kidding. Welcome to hell, kid.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-21-03
Isn't there some sort of way I can negotiate my way out of this?
Like...?
A fiddling contest or a fair trial?
Can you fiddle?
No, but there must be a lot of lawyers here, right?
I hate this job.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-22-03
...and a partridge in a pear tree!
Dumbass.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-22-03
By the way, how did you convince Satan to let you return to this mortal plane?
It wasn't easy. I had to a lot of bargaining.
In the end, though, I came up with something that would benefit the both of us.
I think ALL homicide is justifiable!
Preapre for pain.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-24-03
What's this?
A christmas card.
"Dear Stickman, you will never, ever, have a girlfriend".
That's what you said at easter!
Think of it as an all-purpose greeting.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-28-03
So, made any New Year's Resolutions?
Yes, as a matter of fact. I've decided to kill anyone that gets on my nerves.
Bye.
It's not 2004 yet, you moron.

 

by eggy_mcmuffinman
12-30-03
2004 approaching, sir!
Good, corporal. Keep it in your sights. We don't want to lose it.
OH...MY...GOD!
What is it corporal?? What do you see!!
I like to move it, move it. I like to move it, move it.
Get the nukes.

 
I'm telling you, there's something we were supposed to have been doing.
It'll come back to you.

 

It's the passion...
OF THE CHRIST!
You're not making this any easier, you know.

 

So that, in a nutshell, is my extremely complicated theory on how the universe works.
This is the most awkward date ever.

Showing page 3.

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