All comics by TheNewSoup

Profile

 

by TheNewSoup
8-09-05
john. my name's john, alright?
okay. john. cool. bye then.
later.
see ya.
why aren't you leaving?
that sounds like a made-up name.

 

by TheNewSoup
8-09-05
i can assure you, john is my real name. goodbye.
okay, bye.
what now?
when's your birthday? mine's in september.

 

by TheNewSoup
8-09-05
january. my birthday's in january.
january...
...taurus?
look, can you just leave?

 

by TheNewSoup
8-11-05
man...that guy was a total pest.
excuse me, sir! might i raise an inquiry to you?
no! i told you to go away!
damn! you mean you saw through my clever disguise?
you're not wearing a disguise!

 

by TheNewSoup
8-11-05
look, just answer me this one question and i promise i'll leave you alone.
well, okay. fine. what's your question?
can we hang out?
NO!

 

by TheNewSoup
8-12-05
why can't we hang out?
because i-
YOU AFRAID I'M GONNA RUB SOME CREAM ON YOUR BALD HEAD OR SOMETHING?

 

by TheNewSoup
8-21-05
hello! i am YUL LATEN, LORD OF INVISIBILITY!
kidding! i'm just hiding behind this wall!

 

by TheNewSoup
8-21-05
IS HE GONE, OR IS HE STILL STANDING THERE?!! SUCH IS THE MADNESS OF YUL LATEN!

 

by TheNewSoup
9-05-05
so, seen any good movies lately?
of course not, you've gotten us lost in a massive mountain range 10,000 miles from civilization.
i thought the constant gardener was pretty awesome.
i'm leaving.

 

by TheNewSoup
9-05-05
wait! you can't leave!
i'm sick of being lost all the time. you're the worst leader ever. see ya later.
so all my prurient sexual advances were for nothing?
yeah.

 

by TheNewSoup
9-05-05
so now i'm really all alone in this huge mountain range.
...this is scary...

 

by TheNewSoup
9-05-05
night's coming. i should start a fire. first i need to find some firewood.
shit, i think my firewood whistle and cedar pheremones at home.

 

by TheNewSoup
9-18-05
holy cow! finally! after months of wandering, i see a city over there! back to civilization!
hold it right there. you're not going one step further. i may look like a kid, but i'm actually the world's most skilled assassin.
let's just say i'm being paid a hefty sum to put an end to your journey, lilywocket.
HEY, YOU LITTLE BRAT! GET LOST, THE ADULT HERE IS BUSY! DON'T YOU HAVE A BOY SCOUTS MEETING TO BE AT OR SOMETHING?
your death will be merciless.

 

by TheNewSoup
10-19-05
okay, look here kid, i'll cut you a deal.
i'm listening.
whatever your employer paid you for this job, i'll double it!
really? well, i got $500,000.
man, that's a huge allowance! just how much chores do you DO for your parents, anyway?
shut up!

 

by TheNewSoup
11-11-05
read my comics while stoned.
better?

 

by TheNewSoup
12-05-06
so grandpa, how was your day?
aw shucks, you know i don't like to talk about dairy time...
heh heh heh... naughty, naughty milk...

 

by TheNewSoup
12-09-06
gather around, fair tentacles. i have a story to tell. four eras ago, there were many tall buildings that swayed with the tide-
wait, how long is that four eras?
like eighty years.
each.

 

by TheNewSoup
12-09-06
this guy is an erotic novelist.
GET IT?! CAUSE YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT! HAHAHAHAHA!
BLACK PEOPLE ARE CANNIBALS

 

by TheNewSoup
12-17-06
well well well, if it isn't hootie and the blowfish! haw haw haw!
please hootie, not yet. i've still got so much more to do with my life...

 

by TheNewSoup
12-19-06
welp, i've sealed the doors shut, and there's no way to escape! haha, it's just you and me! ho ho hah ahaaha ha!
please, not the ass. i'm begging you.

 

by TheNewSoup
7-04-08
why would anyone pay you 500,000 dollars to kill me, anyway? who could possibly hate me so much?
that's for me to know and you to find out, my employers demand absolute secrecy.
how about this? how about i guess, and if i get it right, you have to tell me.
okay, sure.
josh.
wrong.

 

by TheNewSoup
7-04-08
ted.
wrong.
max.
wrong.
alan.
wrong.

 

by TheNewSoup
7-04-08
gary.
wrong.
josh.
you already said josh.
i know, are you sure it's not him?
yeah, positive.

 

by TheNewSoup
7-04-08
chaz.
wrong.
okay, here's another idea. how about when i guess, you tell me if i'm hot or cold, so i know if i'm close.
okay, that sounds good.
josh.
cold.

Showing page 4.

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