All comics by dcomposed

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by dcomposed
11-11-02
Here is the artifact.
Thank you. you will be rewarded for your work.
So what does this yo-yo do that is so special?
It is fun to play with.

 

by dcomposed
11-13-02
Happy birthday Brad.
Thanks.
Let's go drink beer and watch wrestling.

 

1
by dcomposed
11-15-02
Hello, my name is Osame Bin Laden.
OH NO!
I can understand why you would be scared of me, I am an evil genius after all.
It's not that that scares me.
what is it?
I thought there was a german sheperd on your face, but it was just your beard.

 

2
by dcomposed
11-15-02
I have come to tell you something.
What is it?
You are my father!
OH NO!
wait.. I'm a virgin.

 

3
by dcomposed
11-15-02
But mother said my father was a matodor.
But there's lots of matadors, why do you think it would be me?
She also said he was a matador who lived on the moon, and I don't see any other matadors here.
What about that guy.
Trick or Treat!

 

4
by dcomposed
11-15-02
I don't think he's a matador.
But I can't be your father. You're older than me.
That's not true.
And I'm Mexican, you're Arabian.
Your father was also Ararbian. It must have skipped a generation.
My father's not Arabian.

 

5
by dcomposed
11-15-02
Your mother was then.
My mother was a dolphin.
There's dolphins in Afghanistan.
But there's no water in Afghanistan.
They're sand dolphins. They swim around in the sand.

 

6
by dcomposed
11-15-02
So what you're saying is that my father traveled from Mexico to Afghanistan to rape a sand dolphin.
Exactly!
OH NO!
meanwhile in some other place...
This way, boys.

 

7
by dcomposed
11-15-02
Don't move, we have you sorounded.
OH NO!
YAY! I KILLED OSAMA!
You killed my son!
He was your son? You'll inherit his millions of dollars then.

 

8
by dcomposed
11-15-02
Congratulations sir, you've just inherited a million million canadian dollars.
OH NO!
Oops, my mistake. American dollars.
OH YES!

 

by dcomposed
11-17-02
My name is Tobor.
How can you love an imputent robot?
The same way I love my imputent cat.
How's that?
In the ass!

 

by dcomposed
11-19-02
What's this? "You: Impotent Red Robot".. "Me: Dashing Young Billionaire".
I'm an Impotent Red Robot! And I do love billionaires.
But the billionaire can not love for who I am... he only wants me for sex, and that would be wrong.. What should I do?

 

by dcomposed
11-19-02
Hello little girl, I'm going to molest you now.
If you have to.. but please be carefull.
Oh.... I forgot I was impotent.
Can I molest you then?
Ok, but make it snappy, I need to see a bilionare about a cock implant.

 

by dcomposed
11-27-02
That was so sweet.
Thank you.
Can we get on with the sodomizing now?
Of course.
Right after I make you a romantic dinner.

 

by dcomposed
11-27-02
Now we are ready for sodomy.
Alright.
Well...
What are you wating for?
I forgot I was impotent.

 

by dcomposed
12-02-02
I know all your secrets.
I don't have any secrets,
What about the time you were sick and had to take Viagra up your anus.
That's no secret, I sent the tape to America’s Funniest Home Videos.
I also know that you were the cowboy in the Village People.
IN THE NAVY!!!

 

by dcomposed
12-12-02
Did I ever tell you about the time I turned into a deer and ate santa?
Hey Santa, I'm gonna eat you.
Fair enough.
Yeah, I think so.

 

by dcomposed
12-25-02
how I spent 12/25
wait.. when did I start smoking?

 

by dcomposed
12-30-02
I've been at stripcreator for a year now.
wow.
well, I'll be in the can if you need me.
I hope he meant on the can.

 

by dcomposed
12-31-02
If I don't fuck up, this will be the first comic of 2003.

 

by dcomposed
3-21-03
After a couple of months of not being able to access the make comics page, The problem seems to have magically worked itself out.
Now I can make my award winning comics whenever I want.
Well, I'll be in the can if you need me.

 

by dcomposed
3-28-03
Don't you know who I am?
Tarzan?
No! I am Jesus and I have come to stop this war.
Let me ask you something, Jesus... Is Heaven a part of the U.N.? No! And it's not because they think you're not good enough!
You're right! I will join your fight against the United Nations. Together we will fight the greater power!
Greater power? But we have Jesus on our side!

 

by dcomposed
4-13-03
Hello brad!
What are you doing at my house, DexX?
I just relised how we are such close friends, but we never do anything together now.
Well there was the time you left that note saying "die you fucker, I hate you" on my lawn.
Yes, good times.
And did you really have to fill my bed with cookie crumbs?

 

by dcomposed
4-13-03
I was thinking maybe now that you are rich you could pay me the twelve thousand dollars you owe me for all the art I submitted.
But you donated that art.
You should have read the fine print I wrote on A_Chicka's inner thigh.
I spent hours staring at Chicka's character, how could I not see it?
I heard you spent all your money on underage pornography, so you're going to have to find a way to get me my money or I will tell boinky33 about the photos of him you have.
Please don't, it could ruin our valuable friendship.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
Hey pimp1-2, got any work for a sexy beast such as myself?
Sure, I can hook you up, but first you have to shave off all your hair like you said you would.
I never said that.
It's right here in the fineprint, look, right here on my ring.
There, I'm as bald as crabby's genitals.
It's time to get to work then.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
So you're my first customer?
Yes, rather ironic isn't it?
Sure is, and I charge by the hour so we better get going.
You charge by the hour?
Do you know a better way?
I'd prefere a flat-rate of sucky sucky five dolla.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
I think I got something from that Asiangirl1-2.
My money I hope.
No, the bitch didn't even leave a tip.
Well you better get it by next week or I'm going to cover your dog in chocolate.
Did you just turn into a ghost?
Thats right, I am not only a great artist, I am also the ghost of braces past.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
So because I got my braces off you've come to haunt me?
Fuck no, I came here to watch football, who's winning?
The Lions.
Great, I love Brisbane.
No, the Detroit Lions.
NOOOOOOO! NFL! That's it, time for some haunting.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
Dude, it's been three days, when's the haunting going to start?
I've been haunting this whole time.
Really?
Well I watched you in the shower, does that count?
I guess that is kind of scary.
It was scary for me too, I didn't know you had your braces reinstalled down there.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
...and now I'm stuck with DexX following me aroung everywhere.
So where is he now?
He should be right here...
Oh no, where'd she go?

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
I miss my good friend LadyJ.
Shouldn't you be out looking for her, then?
Fuck no, you have bigger tits, I'm staying right here.
Oh really...
!!!
Hello, brad.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
So all this time I was married to you when I thought I was married to a slighly more attractive woman.
How do you know that's what happened?
You changed from Jael to LadyJ, I just assumed...
Well you assumed wrong, all this time I was really DexX.
That explains why you've been so good in bed recently.
I'm suprised you didn't remember me from that weekend we spent together in Iraq.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
But I've never been to Iraq.
Oh yeah, I must have imagined that, my wife thinks I'm too ugly so I don't get much real action.
What about all those animals at the petting zoo?
That was just a lie to impress the guys in #stripcreator.
Wow, that's kind of fucked.
Yeah I know. Speaking of fucked, Spankling told me he can get you the rest of my money.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
Hello Spankling.
Hi brad, what can I do for you?
Hmmm.. It all looks pretty good.... I guess I'll take the Anal Hamster Deluxe Package.
Right this way, sir.
MOOOO!
Hey, since when do hamsters say... !! What the h... hey, this feels good.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
Well that was fun, now where's my money?
Money?
Yeah, DexX said you were going to pay me for this.
DexX?, I havn't seen him in years. How is the smelly old bastard?
What? I hate that little wart dicked faggot.
Those warts are my handy work. Get it? HAND-y work! HAHAHAHA!

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
You said Spankling was going to give me money.
Yeah, I guess I lied.
What? Why would you do that?
I'm just a big fat ugly australian liar with a bad haircut, aren't I?
Did you lie about the twelve thousand dollars, too?
It would appear so, yes.

 

by dcomposed
4-14-03
Why would you do that?
Because I love you, brad.
I love you too, DexX, let's get married!
This is the happiest day of my life.
And they all lived happily ever after
You can't have the left side, I sleep on the left. I'm sleeping on the couch if I don't get the left side of the bed.
Oh brad, it doesn't matter what side we're on as long as we're together.

 

by dcomposed
4-22-03
Did I ever tell you about the time I met Osama Bin Laden and he froze me?
Now I shall use you to cool my beverage.
Yeah, I think so.

 

by dcomposed
4-22-03
Did I ever tell you about the time I turned into a loser and sold a burger to a fat guy?
This is good burger.
Yeah, I think so.

 

by dcomposed
4-23-03
Did I ever tell you about the time I turned into Satan and got arested for smoking in a non-smoking section?
Who's the prince of darkness now?
Yeah, I think so.

 

by dcomposed
4-24-03
So what you're saying is that some fat guy found an enchanted hockey mask and now he can't get it off his face so we need to get him to the forbidden cave of doom before the world ends?
That's right.
How are we going to get him?
We will go undercover and trick him into coming with us.
How are we going to do that?
With song, of course.

 

by dcomposed
4-24-03
So you really think this will work?
Sure, fat guy will never suspect a skull and a blob.
But how will we get into his secret underground basement lair?
With song, of course.
As the heroes sang some West Side Story tunes the entrance to the secret underground basement lair exploded.
See that pretty girl in that mirror there!
What mirror, where?

 

by dcomposed
4-24-03
Now we are in the secret underground basement lair, but why are we now disguised as nerds?
I did some research and found out that nerds often dwell in basement lairs playing computer games.
Can we play computer games?
No, we are here to retreive the hockey mask wearing fat guy, but first we must disarm his pet bull. How? With song, of course.
Once again West Side Story has saved the day.
My parents treat me rough, with all their marijuana they won't give me a puff.

 

by dcomposed
4-24-03
In order to get closer to the hockey mask wearing fat guy we have taken over two characters in his nerd army game.
Now we have infiltrated his computer we must get to the main control room and blow shit up.
How will we do that?
With song, of course.
The computer is destroyed by West Side Story.
We'll find a new way of living...
...we'll find a way of forgiving.

 

by dcomposed
4-24-03
We have the hockey mask wearing fat guy and now we will take this luxery ocean liner to the forbidden cave of doom.
That's all good, but how did you get breasts?
The passangers on board the ship were inspired to sing a song from West Side Story.
With song, of course.
I just met a girl named Maria.

 

by dcomposed
4-24-03
We are above the forbidden cave of doom and ready to drop the hockey mask wearing fat guy.
With song, of course.
The fat guy was reminded of West Side Story as he fell to the cave.
A boy like that who'd kill your brother...
...forget that boy and find another.
Now we can get back to playing the halloween game.
It's so fun being a witch.

 

by dcomposed
4-24-03
Well at least my grand mother isn't here.
Just like that the old lady appeared on the scene singing her favorite song from West Side Story.
Only death will part us now.

 

by dcomposed
6-02-03
Welcome to Choking Chicken, what you want bitch?
Yo, can I get a beefy beef burger with beef fries and a beef juice?
No.
IT'S BECAUSE I'M BLACK ISN'T IT?
We don't sell beef products, only chicken.
Oh I see, you only have WHITE meat here.

 

by dcomposed
6-03-03

 

by dcomposed
6-03-03
...

Showing page 4.

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