All comics by seanator

 

by seanator
9-19-08
One fine day...
...no further comment has been released on what will happen to the african american babies.
Oh no, it seems the national midget throwing competition has been thrown off by tragedy!
God have mercy, I feel like tossing my cookies.
We are sorry to end this broadcast on such a sad note...
♪Dm♪

 

by seanator
9-22-08
One fine day...
My farts pack so much methane they can get you high.
Oh yeah? My farts can melt icecaps and change the climate. watch-
Meanwhile...
Did it get real nippy out here or is it just me?
Nips? Where?

 

by seanator
9-22-08
One fine day...
hey boss look im an 'office zombie' for halloween heh...
Chen, you need to man up and clean that crap off you. what are you, ten years old?
no im an office zombie...its a pun you see? ill explain...
The higher ups are coming in today, and I don't need them thinking that we are a bunch of unprofessional know nothings, you hear?
im an office zombie...for halloween...
Melvin you dog! Are you a giant PHALLUS? HAHAHA! I always knew you were a dick head! get it? It's a pun!

 

by seanator
9-23-08
One fine day...
Doctor, I am having pain in my abdomen.
Well then, well just set you up with a CAT scan.
How the hell did you wander all the way over here? My back was turned for five minutes! Don't be such a moron and follow me.

 

by seanator
9-25-08
One fine day...
I just got back from Louisiana and boy have I got insane jet lag!
Isn't that only a couple time zones away?
Yeah
Well what time is it over there?
Circa 1850

 

by seanator
9-27-08
One fine day...
Alright! Lets cross that river styx! You go first.
No... I said....
What's the matter with you?
I cant swim!
Are you crazy? The fall will probably kill you.
Just stop it okay? I get it, har har har. Wait for the goddamn boat.

 

by seanator
9-29-08
One fine day...
Okay so I get the TV, the biggest room, the computer and the driveway.
Occupied!
For fucks sake dude! You've been in there for hours!
Sean is a real dick!
He takes after your side of the family.

 

One fine day...
Look cohort! Thousands of bottles of beautiful Coca Cola!
Let's replace them with urine and flat! MUHAHAHA!
by seanator, 9-29-08

 

by seanator
9-30-08
Sarah Palin is a small town girl with small town values. What she lacks in experience, she makes up for in strong christian values. She truly is a maverick.
But vote Republican anyway.
I'm Sarah Palin, and I am told I approve this message.

 

by seanator
10-01-08
One fine day...
So you're dating my daughter, I need to know you won't break her heart...
Don't worry Sir.
I need to be sure she wont be dissapointed. I need you to fuck me right now, that way I know you are good enough for my little angel.
wait what?
And may the lord have mercy upon your soul if I don't cum.

 

by seanator
10-01-08
One fine day...
So what do you think about global warming?
I personally think that its foolish to even SUGGEST that it doesn't...
oop!
What the hell is wrong with you?
A dingleberry just hardened, it feels like I sat on a Lego.

 

by seanator
10-03-08
One fine day...
So did you hear? Heather Locklear didn't deserve to be arrested! A member of the tabloids called the cops.
Just to get a story. what scum. Was she really drunk though?
No, she blew a zero.
so?
what does David Spade have to do with anything?

 

by seanator
10-07-08
One fine day...
Dude buttsex from chicks is so tough to get man.
I know what you mean! It's not even worth it!
Yeah man, then once you get it, they do nothing but complain!
Yeah! "I can't believe I am doing this"
haha "This isn't even fun for me!"
"I'm only ten!"

 

by seanator
10-13-08
One fine day...
Damn I have an itch again!
Where's that coat hanger when you need it?

 

by seanator
10-19-08
One fine day...
First mate Tibbs! Batton down the hatches!
YARR cap'n!
Tell shipmates Blackheart and Combs to get ready to dock!
YARR cap'n!
meanwhile...
Captain's sort of a faggot making us do this and all.
I concur.

 

by seanator
10-20-08
One fine day...
You know what they say about The Velvet Underground, barely anyone bought the CD but anyone that did made a band.
Nobody bought a Velvet Underground CD.
So it was a digital release?

 

by seanator
10-21-08
One fine day...
Lets give an example of something inappropriate in the workplace. Halloween is coming up...
Let's say I decide to wear a Klansman outfit, does anyone see anything wrong with that?
You're a woman.

 

by seanator
10-22-08
One fine day...
Porn is so funny to watch.
Sexy too.
Not really, It's just really funny.
Yeah...
My penis laughs so hard he throws up.

 

by seanator
10-22-08
One fine day...
So I was walking down this stairway, and some fuck was blocking me, going down all slow just to fuck with me.
yep.
So I kicked his ass down the stairs and took a massive shit on his chest.
good, he deserves it, that's such a dick thing to do.
...and you bet your ass I trashed his walker.

 

by seanator
10-26-08
One fine day...
On today's Dirty Jobs I am going to go straight to the underbelly in a job that is creepy and morally reprehensible...
That's right, Today I am going to bang scores of twelve year old girls, and then just deny any of it happened...
I'm Mike Row and this is Dirty Jobs, Jonas Brother Edition.

 

by seanator
10-27-08
One fine day...
So I think Jeff is gay.
Jeff? no way!
I know for a fact. My gaydar is supreme.
How could you possibly come to that conclusion.
He sucked me off and HE came.

 

by seanator
11-04-08
One fine day...
I'm the voting bat! VOTE!
Who did you vote for?
John McCaine... why?
My vote cancels yours out. Now neither of us has to.
Enjoy your day!

 

by seanator
11-05-08
One fine day...
Because Obama was elected yesterday, today I saw four african americans break down and cry out of sheer joy.
It really is a big open door now.
It made me realize something though.
That we still have a long way to go?
Four black people live in my neighborhood. The property value must be shot.
Pun intended?

 

by seanator
11-05-08
One fine day...
Hey baby gap how's it going?
Why do you call me that? I don't even work there anymore, I got a job at Bath and Body Works now.
Hey BBW how's it going?

 

by seanator
11-06-08
One fine day...
So what did you do election day?
My brother got election day off school. I don't know why.
Because the majority of highschoolers in Louisiana are adults.

 

by seanator
11-15-08
One fine day...
Does that title say what I think it says? Oh no I'm in a bedroom in an oversize trenchcoat... Hey you! Stop reading! Now! Please!
Oh crap here she is... I don't want to do this any more than you want to see this so please just quit reading! Please? Why are you still here?
Asshole

 

by seanator
11-20-08
One fine day...
I am so horrible at my job.
You're horrible? I suck at my job way more than you do.
You're really that bad?
No, I'm a prostitute. I'm excellent!
You're really cocky.
You have no idea.

 

by seanator
11-22-08
Let's see what the judges thought...
Yo dawg, it was aiight
You really showed your true talent in my opinion.
horrible
Was that a jack-o-lantern filled with vicodin?

 

by seanator
11-24-08
One fine day...
Mitch Hedberg? What are you doing here?
Just doing what I do best!
Going to town in a turkey for sheer kicks?
Overdosing on drugs.

 

by seanator
11-24-08
One fine day...
Quick I need a chili cook-off team name!
The Fart Starters
No but it needs to have 'fire and ice' in the name.
The fire and ice chili cookoff brigade.
Also it needs my name.
f-fire and ice patterson.

 

by seanator
11-27-08
One fine day...
My children, god is in us all!
What, does he have like, a bajillion dicks or something?

 

by seanator
11-27-08
One fine day...
Did you just kill someone in my house?
What makes you think that? It's just some jelly jam.
No, thats definitely blood.
It's some delicious jelly jam, it's all over my breadknife see?
You can't just call it something else because of the way it looks.
Why? they do it all the time with pasta!

 

by seanator
12-02-08
One fine day...
Gee wiz! This place sure is a blast! I hear if you say "Bloody Mary" you can see a ghost!
Cuba Gooding Jr.! I thought you were alive!
I am, I think my acting credibility is here somewhere and decided this is the next best place to look.
to what?
Snow Dogs, Boat Trip, Radio, Norbit, Daddy Day Camp, and The Land Before Time XIII. I'm gonna go ask French Stewart over there if he's seen it.

 

by seanator
12-03-08
One fine day...
...and he said to just message his sidekick! How impersonal!
You know what a sidekick is right?
Yeah, rhymes in couplets, says 'yeah yeah' in your rap songs, generally agrees with you, picks at your character flaws during the film's climax...
...laughs at your dumb jokes...
...yeah!

 

by seanator
12-06-08
One fine day...
From my experience, women are equal to men intellectually...
I do think that racism in the south is mainly just hype.
In all my years working at a fast food restaraunt, I never ejaculated in a single order of french fries.
I wouldn't know what sex with your mother would be like.
I thought you were supposed to be lying...
I would never lie about anything like that in my life!

 

by seanator
12-07-08
One fine day...
Hmm..
Whats that?
It's a card from my girlfriend, but something's wrong...
What? is it not to your liking?
The money must've slipped out.
Finders keepers

 

by seanator
12-09-08
test
test

 

by seanator
12-09-08
One fine day...
Someone returned a DVD with a chunk of pizza in it.
That's disgusting! Let me see...
This happened yesterday.
What? Why didn't you tell me then?
There wasn't enough for you, I didn't want to be rude.

 

by seanator
12-11-08
One fine day...
Oh hey Homosexual Innuendo Man...
What's wrong little fella?
Oh, well it sucks being a midget... I cant even see over the bar when im sitting.
I can fix your sorrows in a jiffy!
How?
I'll just push your stool in.

 

by seanator
12-11-08
One fine day at LAX...
Welcome to Knight Airlines, we'll be your shining armor.
Yes, well... I'd like a ticket to Salt Lake City, Utah please. nonstop.
I'm sorry, we have one with a layover in phoenix
You don't fly nonstop there?
We can't, its against the rules.

 

by seanator
12-11-08
One fine day...
and ill get that with a small coke...
We only have Shasta Cola. Diet.
ill pay you two hundred dollars for sexual gratification via intercourse...
Good news! I tested HIV positive so im only charging half that!
one wonka bar please...
Haven't you heard? The last golden ticket has already been found!

 

by seanator
12-11-08
One fine day...
Now son, the new computer is mine, so I don't want you on it.
okay dad...
later...
WelCUM back Hentai4Eva!
Who the hell is Eva? MOOOOOM!

 

by seanator
12-15-08
One fine day...
*nom nom nom nom*
OH THIS IS WONDERFUL!
How was that?
You have a poo moustache, you shouldn't butt munch as much beforehand.
I know, it smells horrible.
And the smell is cunnilingering.

 

by seanator
12-16-08
One fine day...
Wow this is great!
Why yes it is, a game designed around life in the kingdom.
But why is there a black king?
Don't worry, my liege, they always have to go second.

 

by seanator
12-16-08
Today...
They should make a jacket with tiny clear hairs infused inside the stitches
That way, when the owner goes near a black light it'd be funny to watch him freak out
"Hey guys, guys, get one of those lint roller things...alright... ACK! STILL???" That would be a riot.

 

by seanator
12-16-08
Today...
Despite all the buttsex, gays probably have immaculate buttholes.
I know it sounds farfetched, but all the jizz and poo is easily licked away.
Boy am I glad my dog loves the taste of excrement.

 

by seanator
12-16-08
Fact!
Because of the angle that the esophagus enters the stomach, horses are physically unable to vomit.
This phenomena is used to explain a horse's calm demeanor during a beastiality film.

 

by seanator
12-16-08
Fact!
One of Adolf Hitler’s officers planted a bomb intended to kill him. The device killed one officer and injured others,but Hitler escaped unharmed.
Now you don't have to see Valkyrie, you're welcome.

 

by seanator
12-16-08
Fact!
The man who wrote 'Take Me Out to the Ball Game' had never been to one when he penned the famous song
If he had, 'buy me some peanuts and cracker jacks' would be followed by 'fuck you that costs like, twenty dollars!'

 

by seanator
12-16-08
Fact!
It takes seventeen “hits” to sink an opponent’s entire fleet in a game of Battleship
It only takes one "hit" to be accused of cheating.

Showing page 4.

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