All comics by BigFrank105

 

by BigFrank105
12-13-04
Hi Santa! All the presents are ready for delivery!
You are one freaky looking mother fucker.

 

by BigFrank105
12-13-04
How do the Christmas decorations look?
I'm the wrong guy to ask Maura, I hate Christmas.
But how can you say that Pete?
It all started when I was a kid...
10 years earlier...
Yay! Santa! What did you bring me?
Bend over. I'm gonna stick my yule log up your holly jolly ass.

 

by BigFrank105
12-15-04
Hey! It's Santa! Where are all of your elves?
*Burp*

 

by BigFrank105
12-15-04
BigFrank teaches a 5th grade Sex-Ed class.
Billy, can you tell us all where babies come from?
From a lady's vagina!
Okay, that about wraps up my lesson.

 

by BigFrank105
12-15-04
And that wraps up my talk on anal positions. Any questions?
Mr. BigFrank, why does my daddy always call my mom "easy"?
Uh, well, Susie... That might mean---
---And he always says that she "screws around" with "mulattos" and never uses "rubbers"?
Well, why don't you give me your mommy's phone number and your daddy's work schedule?
Ask the principal, he should know.

 

by BigFrank105
12-16-04
You kids really have it these days with your porno movies and internet and such.
Back in my day, me and my friends did UNBELIEVABLE things for sex.
Kinda like when I purposelly failed Sex-Ed to take it again...
Is that why you're still a virgin?

 

by BigFrank105
12-16-04
Wow! Santa! Was I good this year? Are you gonna give me lotsa presents?
Presents? Ha! I'm going to tie you down and shove hot fireplace pokers in your ass and piss on your face!
So I was good?

 

by BigFrank105
12-17-04
My brain capacity is completely full.
How you mean?
Well, whenever I learn something new, I have to push some information out of my head to make room.
That's the stupidest idea ever.
Shit, now I don't know where I live.

 

by BigFrank105
12-20-04
Can I interest you in some pie?
Oh no thanks. I don't like pie.
WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?

 

by BigFrank105
12-20-04
Dude! Did I ever tell you about the time I farted and a house blew up?
Were there people in the house?
Yeah.
HAHAHAHAHA! THAT'S FUCKING HILARIOUS!

 

by BigFrank105
12-20-04
They say fight fire with fire.
Or maybe it's water?
Is that why you shot flares into that burning orphanage?

 

by BigFrank105
12-20-04
Yo dawg, you wanna buy some drugs?
DRUGS? HOLY SHIT! I FUCKING LOVE DRUGS!
DRUGS ARE THE FUCKING BEST MAN! I WOULD FUCKING KILL MY OWN MOTHER FOR DRUGS! DRUGS ARE THE BEST!
So you'll buy some then?
No.

 

by BigFrank105
12-21-04
I went into a drug store for the first time yesterday.
And I'll have you know I was extremely disappointed.

 

by BigFrank105
12-21-04
Uh, will you go out with me?
Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you? I'm a guy!
You didn't answer my question.

 

by BigFrank105
12-21-04
Ha! I just went potty all by myself!
Ass.

 

by BigFrank105
12-23-04
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
Uh, today isn't my birthday...
WELL FUCK YOU THEN!

 

by BigFrank105
12-23-04
What was in that cocktail I just drank?
Uhhh... Rat poison, cod liver oil, dead babies, and cherry juice.
Cherry juice? You sick fuck!

 

by BigFrank105
12-23-04
Yeah so then I generated the gravitons and he was all "Liek WtF?11" and I said that blah blah blah...
God, he's been rambling for hours. How do I shut him up?
And the cowboys didn't know what I was doing, so I decided to---
---Did I ever tell you about the time I got crabs? Funny story!
Yes, that went over quite well.

 

by BigFrank105
12-23-04
Damn Boinky! 2000 sure is a lot of comics! What do you have to say at this milestone?
CUNTS!

 

by BigFrank105
12-24-04
Hey.
What?
Fuck you.

 

by BigFrank105
12-25-04
Merry Christmas, Susie!
Daddy! I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus last night!
Dammit, your whore mother's at it again!

 

by BigFrank105
12-26-04
Christmas Eve, 2004.
Tonight's the night that Santa comes down the chimney!
I know that...
That's why I have this.

 

by BigFrank105
12-28-04
*ring ring*
Hello?
Heheh! Is your refrigerator running?
Um, yes it is.
Oh, okay.

 

by BigFrank105
12-29-04
Can I fingerbang you?
Sure!
BANG!

 

by BigFrank105
12-29-04
What do you mean I can't run for a third term?

 

by BigFrank105
12-30-04
Hey baby...
I HAVE HERPES!!!

 

by BigFrank105
12-30-04
Hey baby, wanna fuck?
I HAVE HERPES!!!
We'll use plastic wrap, then.

 

by BigFrank105
1-04-05
"Who was this guy?" I thought to myself. He claims to be my best friend, yet I haven't had any human contact since I started playing Everquest.
Yeah, I really don't think I've ever seen you before...
You dumbass! I'm your childhood imaginary friend!
Of course! When I was but a wee lad I had no friends except my imaginary friend Trenchcoat Sam! I thought he had ran away because I was such a loser which made me slit my wrists on multiple occasions.
Trenchcoat Sam! It's you! Where have you been all these years
I've always been with you, you've just been repressing me with porn and hard liquor.
Ironically, Sam had been the voice in my head that told me to buy that Penthouse and the bottle of Jim Beam. He had always been one for advice, but how could he help me find my pants?
Uh, so how can you help me find my pants?
Do not make haste, Blue! For we must be prepared if you wish to know the truth!

 

by BigFrank105
1-06-05
MWAHAHAHAHAHA! I AM THE GRIM REAPER, THE KING OF THE UNDEAD! I AM HERE TO TAKE YOU AWAY!
Wanna buy some crack?
Sure!

 

by BigFrank105
1-06-05
MWAHAHAHAHA! YOU WILL COME WITH ME LITTLE GIRL! HAHAHAHAHA!
Your fly is open.
I hate myself...

 

by BigFrank105
1-06-05
So how goes GTA: Chi-town?
It's decent, except whenever I jack a ride I usually have to wait for 3 hours in traffic to go anywhere.
God that sucks, what about the weather or music?
Horrible, the forecasters can't even get it right, blaming all of their mistakes on "lake effect". And every radio station features Mancow or R. Kelly.
So why are you still playing it?
It's either this or GTA: Jackson Hole.

 

by BigFrank105
1-06-05
I heard you got Grand Theft Amish.
Don't remind me...
Jebediah, for this mission thou must raise a barn in 4 months!
Zecchius, thou shall fornicate yourself with an iron rod!
Maybe the series is getting a little to old...
And believe me, there is no satisfaction in "jacking" a buggy.

 

by BigFrank105
1-08-05
It's 2 in the morning, mom's asleep, and the door's locked.
Dare I go to the site where all teenagers dream about going?
www.joanriversnude.com
I hope I last more than 18 seconds this time!

 

by BigFrank105
1-08-05
I need to find a better porn site to spend my nights on...
I hate my life.

 

by BigFrank105
1-08-05
SexyCamBitch12 has sent you an Instant Message, do you accept?
Finally! A hot cam girl to get me going!
Downloading...
MOM!?!?

 

by BigFrank105
1-08-05
BOOM! Did you see that? Ahman Green took the ball and ran it one yard!!! It's gonna be third down!!!
Oh John Madden, you're so hot when you get excited like that!

 

by BigFrank105
1-11-05
You've been sitting and starting at that computer screen for three days!
You need to get out of that chair right now!
And then I realzied he'd be dead for three days.

 

by BigFrank105
1-11-05
Hi! I'm an elf! I'm always happy and I spread Christmas cheer wherever I go!
Holy shit... I am so high right now...

 

by BigFrank105
1-12-05
Reports today show that a child died from soap ingestion after his mouth was washed out with soap.
Sources say he'd been mouthing off to his father for quite some time.
That'll teach the little bastard.

 

by BigFrank105
1-12-05
A man was arrested earlier today trying to solicit sex.
He'd been offering people sums of over 1000 dollars for oral sex.
Damn, where can I find this guy?

 

by BigFrank105
1-12-05
And now, to Bryan Gumble with the weather!
Alright folks! What's goin on in your neck of the woods?
Heh heh heh heh heh heh heh...

 

by BigFrank105
1-16-05
The police arrested a black man this afternoon.
Apparently he was driving too fast while stopped at a red light.
Wow...

 

by BigFrank105
1-17-05
So Tim, what did you do to honor the great MLK today?
I got naked and waved my penis at traffic.
I'm just kidding, I never got fully naked.

 

by BigFrank105
1-18-05
Boy I'm stuffed! I just ate 47 small children!
Yeah, I know the feeling.

 

by BigFrank105
1-21-05
Uh, hello. I'm President George Bush. I'm talk to here with drugs you about.

 

by BigFrank105
1-23-05
My fondest memory was when I was playing Halo 2 online and I got a "Killamanjaro" Medal in a ranked game!
MY FONDEST MEMORY IS WHEN I CRAPPED IN A CAKE AND GAVE IT TO YOU FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY AND WATCHED YOU EAT IT!
Dude...

 

by BigFrank105
1-24-05
I'm gonna go take a shower.
Watch out for Jerry Lewis! LOL!!!
You see? Dumbass comments like that is why you never get laid you cunt.

 

by BigFrank105
1-24-05
You're gay!
At least I get laid.
:(

 

by BigFrank105
1-24-05
hay you wanna party in the club
time to ride dog
ride a bike yall
were my dogs at
i enjoy cheese
shut the fuck up

 

by BigFrank105
1-27-05
START THE SHOW! START THE SHOW! START THE SHOW!
START THE SHOW! START THE SHOW! START THE SHOW!
Ladies and Gentlemen! Put your hands together for Ja Rule!
WOOOO!!!
WOOOO!!!
Actually folks, the show's cancelled. Ja Rule got high and passed out in his limo with a bottle of Vodka.
WHAT THE FUCK?

Showing page 5.

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